Checking in day 38. Hope you all have a great weekend!
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So pretty. Those are my favorite trees. Iāll miss them in Santa Monica this year. Thanks for the reminder. And look at you almost 2000 days!! Wowzers!,
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Day 255 checking in we keep it moving odaat
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Hey Mike. Iāve been watching and lurking on your quest to rehab. FWIW Iām so fucking proud of you and so happy you are making this decision. You know. You. And your girls, are always in my prayers. You are going to get that miracle.
Love you man.
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Thank you Eric that means alot man. Iāll miss chatting with you all but looking forward to coming back healed
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You can do it mike 
I have never utilized rehab but I think you are very brave and strong for doing so
I look up to that
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Be sure to pack some pics of those beautiful girls of yours. A framed tangible pic or 2. Thatās some mighty inspiration for ya. And theyāll love getting letters from Daddy. My kids still have my letters I sent them. And I still have the ones they set me. Youāre so worth it. And so are they. 
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Thanks man. I canāt lie there is a part of me that is like wtf are you doing, I feel like Iām gonna miss out on everything. But deep down I know nothing is gonna change if I donāt do this. At one point it felt like it clicked and I had it and I had a connection to recovery but after I relapsed I havenāt been able to get it back. Iām really hopeful that going and doing this is going to give me that connection and guide back.
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Me and my mind. I want to heal my soul and mind so that I no longer desire escaping myself
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Idk man thatās why Iām leaving Monday to hopefully figure that shit out.
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You will definitely get that connection back as long as you really want to recover. It was exactly like that for me. Because after such a relapse you are literally and figuratively off the path and you lose the feeling of recovery. After a while you want to but you donāt know how. This is the solution, the step you have now taken. Soon in rehab youāre going to think wtf did I really think I would miss this? No, you get the feeling back. I believe in you
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For sure I do want it. Otherwise I wouldnāt be going, nobody is forcing or making me. I want to do it bc I know Iāll be able to learn about myself and have rules and get a routine back in my life something Iām not doing on my own.
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Thanks man. I really hope I figure this shit out too. Idk either way Iām going hopefully itās not a waste of time. I want it, or maybe Iām just saying I want it who knows.
Day 14 (Part 2) - I made it. Thanks in no small part to the kindness and generosity of spirit of you all on here.
Today was a real test. I was alone for the whole day. Sat at home with nothing but time and my thoughts. For me and my addiction itās probably one of the most triggering situations. I didnāt really connect the dots. Since my seperation I have been busy and around people the whole time. Today I was alone for the first time and the cravings were bad. Iām not going to lie, the afternoon was long but I made it through until one of the people I am living with came home, which feels like a massive achievement. Temptation ignored for today.
Sitting here now I realised that it was the loneliness which had been driving those feelings. I really had to open up to how I was feeling and talk about it to get through. Iām feeling so good for getting past the temptation. It feels like a real victory.
So thank you again for all your support and kindness. Particularly to @Dazercat and @Butterflymoonwoman your encouragement today helped me power through a low ebb so thank you 
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Thatās the plan. Going in sitting down and doing what they say. Iām not going to make friends just better myself, pretty much just gonna sit shut up and do the assignments they give me and figure it out.
Yes thatās what we talked about and I said to take pictures and print them out and make a portfolio. I can only take 3 pictures with me, so Iām taking two of them and then the third in gonna have them draw me a picture together to take as well.
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Thanks @Lorelai itās both a relief and a joy to get to the end of the day and out the other side. Now onwards and upwards!
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Checking in- 66 days 
I have a busy Saturday planned. Gym, taking my daughter to her swimming lessons, and a lunch with a friend. Visit with my sister in the afternoon.
Iām getting close to the end of my blanket, and we have a bit of packing to start for our move at the end of the month.
Grateful to be sober. I felt a bit of a pang last night, my husband and I went out for an evening walk and snack after work along the water front. Thereās so many bars and restaurants, and there were a lot of people out drinking and celebrating.
I donāt miss alcohol, but I miss the social aspect of going out, being with adults, music etc.
I hope in time Iām comfortable enough again to go out and enjoy those things without feeling like I may relapse.
Anyway, just wanted to get those thoughts out of my head.
I love reading and catching up on how you are all travelling
@Charlie_C im super happy to hear you are keeping busy and doing totally fine unsupervised. I hope everyone loved the cookies!
@BrianP well done on 40 days! Got a medal and everything, youāre kind of a big deal now 
@mamador friendships are hard when you get sober, do what you feel is best. I question mine all the time when my life takes different directions. The ones that are happy to spend time with you no matter the changes or difficulty in your life are the ones worth keeping
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Hey congratulations on one week and escaping moderation thinking!
Moderation thinking and the ālittle compromisesā wasted so much of my time!! and i will have to watch out for them always. Catching them is something to be proud of.
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