Sending success vibes to you 
. I really respect people who go out and make their own business or try to do things themselves.
Edit - and I just read about the adoption visit. Exciting and nervous feelings, for sure.
That photo just makes me think of this song
(5063) Jessica Darrow - Surface Pressure (From “Encanto”/Sing-Along) - YouTube
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Thanks Fleur! 
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Hey all, checking in on day 735. I hope everybody has a good one!
Also, happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there!
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Day 10025
I haven’t put my days in when checking in before because deep inside it made me feel like a braggart or something. So this lovely morning I sat with my coffee and really thought hard about it. Do I take a bit of pride in my time? Well, yes. I do. Do I try to have others take pride and joy in theirs? Hell, yeah! After the lives we lived with so little to be proud of, every single day being clean and sober is something we can hold our heads up high over. Frankly, showing my days is also a way of being that role model in recovery I keep stressing. If an old addict like me can do it then I have complete faith that anyone can if they put everything they have into their recovery program.
Went to bed early last night and slept in late this morning 
I feel so well rested at last. My goal today is to relax. That’s it. Sometimes we just need to recharge our batteries. I usually just push and push to do, do, do. I forget to sit and bask in the peace and joy life gives me. Today is my day.
I’m hoping all of you have a blessed sober day and remember to give yourself time to just enjoy today. 
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I’m ao grateful u didn’t follow thru with that sneaky thot of taking a sip. Honestly tho… where DOES it come from?! Like even after years it can pop back up. I guess that’s why they call it a daily reprieve. I mean when I think back, I spent alot, if not all, of every day getting high or trying to find money for drugs. So I suppose it’s the same for recovery, working on it each day also. But I would be curious to know why once we have crossed that invisible line and became addicts and alcoholics, why we can’t go back. I guess it doesn’t matter really bcuz ultimately it is the way it is. It’s what we do with it now. And I’m grateful that u noticed that little voice and didn’t listen to it. Hope ur day is filled with lots of self care!
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Just remember: there’s two types of scared. “Losing your virginity” scared, and “Getting robbed at gunpoint” scared. Things are going positive for you now, you’re gonna be gold I can tell.
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I 
your post! If I could heart it 1000x I would!!! I had no idea you have been in recovery for this long and honestly I am sooo glad that you posted your clean time. Brag all u want bcuz honestly everyday is a win for us in recovery! People need to know it’s possible to get long term sobriety. I certainly do! To think I can stay clean for the rest of my life scares me right now! So its crucial for me to stay in the moment and focus on one day at a time. It does scare me but at the same time it doesn’t. The only part that scares me is managing my emotions and trauma clean and sober. But I am doing it now. The more I sit with my emotions and not try to change them instantly, the easier it gets to do that… I just never gave it a real good try before and didn’t think I could do it. I want to get to where u are! This inspires me and shows me that I can get real long term recovery. I love ur posts and I’m so glad ur here! Please keep posting ur clean time 
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Great to see your numbers 
show them with pride, you’re definitely an inspiration to myself and no doubt many others here. I’m so grateful you’ve joined our community
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Feeling kinda down lately, struggling with the regular use of refer and the mrs. We’ve been having talks and I think she agrees that things would be better all around with complete sobriety, but she really likes to smoke and doesn’t feel there’s really a negative with small amounts, but basically daily use. Also she completely quit drinking when I quit so I’m grateful for her support in that regard, and I also don’t hate pot. It’s not like it was with booze where I’m killing myself and ruining my life, but idk half the time I’m Ok with it (I obviously buy it) but even then I just feel like I could do better. Be more articulate and less forgetful… but then when I don’t smoke at all I’m MUCH more prone to manic episodes where I don’t sleep for like days and go off on spending sprees and other indulgences.
It’s hard cause it’s subtle AND it’s like the “living with a drinker,” problem which I’ve never hard to deal with.
Thankfully things with wife and I have never been better. We’re talking and working through this together. If the point in life is as simple as living then this thing will add to our life story together I suppose. That’s how I’m seeing it cause the perspective of being a constant failure (which is my default perspective 
) is just counterproductive.
Ill stop rambling now. Thank you all for being here. Take care.
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I was a big time potaholic. Even when I gave up my meth I struggled with letting go of my smoke. I still clearly remember the last time I did it. On a beach in Hawaii when I was still claiming around 90 days clean. My mind told me that trying some good hawaiian was on my bucket list so I did it. Went up to my apartment and did the classic paranoid peering out the blinds for hours lol. The next morning I passed on my turn speaking at the meeting. I couldn’t take it so at last call I spoke up and took my last white chip. It was January 7th 1995. I don’t regret it.
Now I stand up in support of any type of MAT for recovery. As far as your manic episodes have you tried any of the cbd products? Just remember there are two types. Those that still get you high and those that don’t but work on calming anxiety and help with sleep. Maybe give those a try. Even pot these days can be dangerous to buy because you never know what is added to it. I swear fent dealers will do anything to create more addicts for their business. Just my thoughts.
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Morning Check in
Day 125
Almost at work. Feeling pretty good today overall. Actually prayed and did my daily devotionals and readings on the bus. I haven’t connected to my HP like I usually do in the mornings for about a week (made me think about me being a really b!tchy person this week… coincidence?). Its amazing truly what my HP can do for me when my thoughts and actions are on God and being a better person and not being so self centered and ungrateful. Anyway, I want to wish all the fathers and grandfather’s here on TS a Happy Father’s Day! Hope everyone has an addiction free day! Hugs TS fam!
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I was having a pretty good morning until I realized it’s Father’s Day. My own father died alone, because due to circumstances I put myself into, I couldn’t be there for him. And I can’t have children of my own. I’m trying not to be bummed out by this.
Still, Happy Father’s Day to all the guys out there!
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Awww sweetheart, you literally made me cry lol. I’m so proud of you. I still recover 24 hours at a time.
Hun, the longer you keep pushing forward the easier it will be to face past trauma and work through it. I was a child of an alcoholic. Taken from my mother, separated from my siblings and placed in more foster homes than I can recall. Childhood abuse, some of it bad. Grew up, joined the military, suffered SA there. Got married and we both descended into the pits of addiction which led to a lot of emotional abuse and DV. Lived in my van with two kids. A lot more I won’t list. I’m telling this part to show you I do understand trauma. As I grew in my recovery each thing I needed to work through fell into place at the exact time it was supposed to. I learned not to push until I was ready to accept. My path is mine. Yours might be different and that is okay. I wish you well on your walk of trauma recovery. Just remember one day at a time works for that as well.
You are a blessing on this app. I throughly enjoy watching your growth. Stay blessed
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Day 737 clean and sober today. The concert was AMAZING last night and much needed. First time ever seeing Slipknot live and they were way better then I thought they would be, so freaking powerful. Have an amazing day today everyone I love you guys!!! 
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Day 14 today! 2 whole weeks, and not a single drop of alcohol. I honestly don’t know how long it’s been since I’ve done that and that’s a little terrifying to think about how much I turned to a bottle for one thing or another. But on the flip side, I’m so excited! Two weeks AF and I feel amazing to have gotten this far. I’m looking forward to continuing on to my 20 days and then my 30 days.
I hope y’all have an awesome day and can find some joy in being clean/sober today 
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5 Days
I WILL NOT DRINK TODAY
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Yes I often use cbd (which I call o’dweed lol) it does have a tiny tiny bit of thc… but I also, on other days, use heavy doses of thc. The cbd has been good though cause I feel different and relaxed without being like high and it’s been a good compromise. Also everything is “medical” so it’s more regulated than street pot.
“Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed down-stairs one step at a time” Mark Twain
Alcohol was something I was able to fling out the window but this I feel like I’m in the coaxing down one step at a time approach. As a somewhat binary person, on/off is more comfortable than regulating because that sometimes leads to anxiety in anticipation or a binge/abstain tomorrow mentality.
Thanks for sharing your experiences with me.
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Two weeks of being a miracle! Oh that is wonderful to see What an awesome milestone.
Ok, I’m going to show my ignorance here. I’ve wondered what it means and I’m finally going to ask. AF?? What does that mean? I keep seeing it posted. I know when you tell me I’m gonna be like 
duh lol
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Oh honey, I’m sorry. My father is gone too. I couldn’t afford to go home 1800 miles away when he passed and I still am very sad about that. He knew I had turned my life around but he never saw me in person clean.
I hope you still can find some good in today.
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Alcohol free 
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