Day 137 of no self harm
I haven’t gotten any less sick. I ended up in the er yesterday and got some IV fluids and I went home but still feeling just as sick.
Keeping nothing down for a week has caused me to lose weight which has completely triggered my eating disorder and now I don’t want to keep anything down even on the rare occasion I’m able to
Amazing! Well done
Hope you have a fun night and can resist those temptations. Do you have a get- out plan in case it gets too much?
Random shout outs, apologies to anyone I missed:
@GOKU2019 Congrats on 9 months!
@SassyBoomer Not worried about walls breathing. But it’s been 20 years since a sweat sock challenged me to a fight, and any day could be that day!
@RosaCanDo Can’t wait to see the tattoo. What ya get?
@CB103036 Don’t feel bad, and definitely don’t dwell on it. Forgive yourself and keep going. 
@Sunny11 700 is stunning, keep it up!
@Mindymoo Pants? Is this a bad thing in the UK? I’ve got tinnitus too, thanks to Lexapro. Hope you feel better soon.
I had a pretty non-descript day. I took a Seroquel which I haven’t done in months. Slept about 4 hours longer than normal and woke up feeling bad (not pants bad, but still…) I woke up feeling like I had a hangover. Now here’s the weird part:
Normally a hangover feels physically bad, plus I feel shame and guilt from having relapsed. I woke up with my body feeling bad, my emotions just automatically follow suit. I was feeling the same shame and guilt as if I had drank alcohol the night before! Has this every happened to anyone?
I posted pics!
And yes, I do know the feeling of physical pain/feeling physically bad triggering the emotional pain. I’ve shared here before that when I have migraines and can’t function I sometimes feel like I’m hungover and it triggers the shame spiral. It’s good to be aware and remind yourself when it happens that it’s normal and part of your recovery experience. Still sucks, but it helps to know where the feeling is coming from, in my opinion.
Hi Megan, I’m sorry you’re going through such a rough time. Congrats on 137 and hang in there. 
Congrats on 9 months!!
Congratulations on 2 weeks, you should be very proud, it is a big accomplishment
I don’t
But just finished dinner and I’m having a lot of fun. Sober still. I love dancing and I’m sure that will be plenty of distraction
Congrats on 2 weeks. I used to have a lot dreams like that. Especially in my boozin days, probably from dehydration. Get some rest, and take care.
Day 290
Hello everyone 
Last 2 nights iv managed to get sleep and be asleep and awake bright and early its 5:35am here and been up since 4:30am and I feel good and ready to have a nice day.
I got my chef hat back on and feeling much more like my new self again after a week or 2 of a few bumps, but I’m over them now.
So last night I prepared and marinated x2 types of lamb koftes, chicken shish tawook, and I have original kosher flat breads with tzakti and hummus and salad I am cooking this today and looking forward to it so il be posting pics of them later.
I wish you all a sober happy day
Il be catching up on here throughout the day too so if I run out of likes soon i am still reading and keeping up with you all, I’m here if anyone needs cheering up or anything I can do to help
I should have checked there first. Now I do feel like a tool. 
I’m pretty aware of mind/body connection but it still caught me a bit by surprise. Glad it’s not me losing my mind again.
@RosaCanDo @DryIn785 How interesting for me to see this written in a way that makes so much sense.
When i am having bad mental health spouts or my sleeping is off for a few days in a row I get that guilt shame feeling and only recently this week realised it made me feel like I was back there in all the problems shame and guilt it felt exactly the same and I was thinking about this and you have written it and it just made so much sense to me. Hope your doing okay
@Alicat22 congratulations on your 2 weeks. Dreams /nightmares I have them sometimes and they can be relly unnerving. Depends situation its been about for me but the feelings can stay with me for a while after.
Hope you feel better after waking up properly and knowing your sober and safe
@SadMemeQueen Hey I hope your feeling a bit better your doing so well 137 days I’m so proud to see the effort you put in.
@Lovelyoutlook Its nice for you to be able to still have fun and stay sober, it’s a great feeling when you realise life is still really fun without needing a drink. Good on you 
@GOKU2019 Big congratulations on your 9 months
@runner 2 days is amazing , you can do this and maybe try a meeting online to help through those tough moments, and reach out here where there is tons of support, you can get through this.
@maxwell congratulations on your day 36 ?
You always cheer me up and make me smile, thank you for being so lovely and thoughtfull. I often think of you and I’m so glad to be here with you 
@Sunny11 Huge congratulations on your 700 days 
@Staringupfromthewell We learn something when we relapse, for each of us it’s something that helps us stronger for the next time to stay sober for the better. I know you probably feel rubbish right now but you have to push those feelings aside, remember why you want to stay sober and not let the low feelings and emotions keep you in that dark place. I’m glad you came straight here after, unfortunately some never make it back, this addiction/disease kills. We have to pick ourselves up, and restart and there is no point making yourself feel worse than you do now. Lean on us and get to a meeting either online or face to face, it really is so powerful to listen to others experience. I know you have the strength to do this I’m here for you, so are we all.
You have a fresh start, and you learnt alot being sober before this, so use those tools that helped you and add in something new, something that can help you pass the time if you get feeling like you did before you used. Now you know that these feelings may come back that your felt before your relapse, so this time be prepared with how to cope with it, I believe in you.
Hi everyone I am reading all your posts, I always reply to the first 10 I come across reading up then the rest I am congratulating you for having the strength to get through today
Thank you for the encouragement 
That’s what I did when I went to see Pearl jam last weekend… I danced my way through it.
Could be dehydration it was quite warm here yesterday… my little boy woke me up early so I’m up at 6:30. But I’m grateful I’m sober and although I had a very disturbed night, I feel happy to be up with him.
Well done @Sunny11 
days in your pocket!
@GOKU2019 
months is a sober baby! 
Congratulations!! 
And a compliment for you as well @Alicat22 , well done for the 
weeks and keep them coming! 
Nice tattoo @RosaCanDo !! 
#Day 1397 
Feeling better day by day, but not the old “me” yet. Made a walk yesterday but it was longer then I wanted it to be. So slept the whole afternoon because of it. Hubby was crushed on the couch as well. So today only short walks are allowed.
Going to work tomorrow, hope it’s not to soon for it. We’ll see!
it!
That is a fun fact about hiding ‘ugly’ things in the Netherlands. I adore that couple, I too hope I look that happy someday. 
Thank you for sharing
