The zoom meetings still happen!! I have never been to one tho! Let me rustle up that link…
4 Likes
Here you go! They were on yesterday I believe!
7 Likes
tagging you here Hey there, just wanted to say that since you’re dealing with your past in therapy, it’s likely those characters/events/or something in the ball park would appear in your dreams too. You’ve opened that door to look in, so they might pay you a visit.
Don’t worry. You survived the abuse, you will survive the recovery 
7 Likes
Yes exactly. Our minds are tricky right? Although I am amid this new spiritual-based life, I began to live it in my head instead of just being. Instead of waking up in the morning and facing absolute surrender to my HP and to this life, I was planning my spiritual practice like it was a meeting schedule. Spiritual? Meh. Ego? Absolutely.
I noticed my ego took over when I caught myself last year planning to take my daughter’s meds. That scared me, and I really got on top of my thoughts and behaviors after that. Too much though, it was militant. It was as if I had lost trust in myself, but I had done the RIGHT THING! I called my sponsor when I had bad thoughts, I was open and honest with my DR about my thoughts and why I was having them, and I got properly medicated under Dr’s supervision. But that wounded part of my head grabbed ahold of the incident and told me that I couldn’t be trusted, that I was dangerous, and that I needed to be watched like a hawk. That is the part that is in my head that speaks from fear, it’s not wisdom, and it started to manhandle my spirituality.
Our egos don’t take too kindly to being shadowed by spirituality, therefore it’s not uncommon for the ego to ambush spirituality for its own survival and gain.
10 Likes
Seriously!! Same!! I have to laugh at it all sometimes…how we tangle ourselves up in our heads. That endless chattering mind of I have to I must I should if only.
6 Likes
Omg thank you Rob and also you @SassyRocks for finding this! I cant usually do saturdays due to work but tuesday is a possibility!! Omg im getting nervous now 
4 Likes
@Rockstar24777 Thank you so much 
your also one of the kindest caring people here, always making sure everyone is orite 
Its great to hear your enjoying work and also its been noticed that your doing it well
I didn’t sleep much last night actually i didnt sleep at all ! I fell asleep at 10am this morning and have just woken at 5pm 
usually id feel really guilty and bad for this but i dont which is good.
Just going to concentrate on a few things like going for a walk and cooking then i probably need to just get back into bed today.
Hope you manage to sleep tonight
3 Likes
This is very interesting and Im learning alot!!.. i was just commenting on another thread about self reliance and spirituality. How i often have to force myself to reach out to my HP during hard times bcuz my natural tendency is to want to rely on self. I want to fix me, I want to get myself out of this, I know whats best. When in reality my best thinking got me to this point of drug addiction and pain. What makes me think that I can do this on my own?? My HP is where my reliance needs to be on yet theres this daily inner pull to rely on myself to get things done. I guess thats why they say something in the rooms about how we have a daily reprieve from our addictions based on our spiritual condition (or something along those lines lol). Your insight has really helped me girl 
Thank you!!!
3 Likes
Day 66 AF!
Last night I went to a bar/club with my best friend for the first time in 66 days because we both needed a break and to catch up. As hard as it was I had a Red Bull and still had an ok time catching up. She had a drink. I’m not going to lie it was pretty tempting and I kept telling myself I can just have one to loosen up more. But I stood my ground and left after my Red Bull. Thankfully she’s not a heavy drinker and only had one cause if we would’ve made another bar trip I think I would’ve gave in.
I was able to drive home sober and am up this morning feeling great. I’m so proud of myself! Cause it wasn’t easy but I managed. Other than that!
These sober days are getting easier and I barely even think about drinking when I’m not around it! The days are also going fast. Next milestone is 90 days!
Y’all have a blessed sober day!
16 Likes
This definitely is something i am working on, surrendering to my HP.
My HP is God, iv just never learnt how to let go. But im working on this very hard, to try to understand and to let my HP help me to understand and do this.
Thank you, you always make so much sense when explaining stuff there is always something to take away from your words that opens up my eyes to things i couldnt see.
2 Likes
Good mornng. Checking in day 172 af. Taking my boy to the pumpkin patch today. Have a great day everyone!
14 Likes
Wow that is a breathtaking photo!
2 Likes
@HeyImKris its been a few days since I’ve seen you around and I know shits been rough on you. Just checking in to see how you’re doing. Thinking about you 
3 Likes
Wooooo 
there’s a thread around here called most inspiring nature pictures (or something like that) you should share this over there too. It’s lovely.
2 Likes
Its our local beach
2 Likes
Just checking in today!!!
I am feeling pretty good!!
1 yr 4 months 25 days no alcohol
3 months 6 days no weed (6th relapse), I won’t lie the cravings are still strong as ever and i so want to light up, but I won’t!!!
Had an amazing day yesterday. Me and a few MTB BUDDIES went to an MTB event called Good Dirt Ride and competed it. 22 miles & 1,500 ft In climbing & it was muddy and wet a MTBER dream for perfect dirt(hero dirt) It was in Rancho San Margarita some crazy insane hills, but i love the down hill part! Hills are love hate relationship 
Well was going to add a pic but it wont let me.
19 Likes
Hello all,
Checking in on Day 1,543.
God Bless!
17 Likes