Checking in daily to maintain focus #52

#Day 1617 :walking_woman:
Still feeling a bit sick, but work yesterday went well. Skipped my coffee routine to ease my stomage.
Today? Camomile tea :sweat_smile:
Having the day off and planning to go to the triftshop treasure hunting.

Look at this Heron and the big fish he caught!
It was to big for him to swallow. He was struggeling with it and had to drop it in the water.
It was fun to see and catch it on my phone.
Have a good day all! :raising_hand_woman:

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@Butterflymoonwoman Lazy is most certainly NOT a word I would use to describe you! I think your husband was just venting his own stuff.

@Juli1 ODAAT! Keep going! :purple_heart:

@SoberGuyUSA Hang on in there!

@KarenKW Mental health is a life-long journey. But the basis of it is definitely sobriety.

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And here I am again, on my way home. I don’t cough or sneeze any more, temperature is back to normal, but I have zero energy and I don’t tolerate a mask while walking.
My coworkers weren’t amused bc we’re still pretty much understaffed.
But I can’t work like this.
Tomorrow I have an appointment at the Dr. again. I hope I’ll get a sick note for this week too to recover fully.

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Day 924

Trigger warning - eating disorder and self harm

Struggling a bit with daily frustration, mostly with regard to the husband, and more deep seated dissatisfaction and tiredness, with life in general. Food is pretty bad of late. I don’t know if it is an effect of binge eating, or psychosomatic, but I have been having odd feelings in my chest. And feelings of not really caring about my body, that I am happy to just eat and eat and give myself a heart attack. I am probably being dramatic and not that unhealthy yet. But I just feel like I am losing control and I don’t really care. And I don’t like the feeling, so did resort to some not deep at all self harm. Like I do it just because I don’t know what else to do (drinking is of course off the table) but I don’t do it properly. I really need to engage some extra tools. Getting back to exercising would be a start. Or maybe try meditation for the hundredth fecking time.

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Sending you a big healing hug filled with love and care for you! You deserve it :heart::people_hugging:

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Hey all, checking in on day 982. I hope everybody has a good one!

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Day 266, you know I cherish my recovery very much and I’m working my but off today and every day here on out. With my med management I’ve been on the best track that I’ve been on, this winter I did not sit in self pity or depression like usual, I had some bad days yes of course but I was able to get myself out of the funks much smoother. I do have a hard time when I hear some of the guys say meds are just crutches and that I don’t need the medince I take for my adhd, they make me feel like I’m not sober because of this stuff. I’ve gone my whole life trying it my way without the meds for my ADHD and I’ve done nothing but struggle every day of my life. Today I feel attentive,focused, goal oriented, spiritual, and confident which is because of the med management and changing my thinking and putting in the work. I’m proud of how far I’ve come. I’m grateful to see the sun today, grateful to hear some geese coming are way, grateful to be able to ride my bike to the gym. Much love…and @HillbillyChris good luck with your dentist appointment, you’ll do good man. @Butterflymoonwoman you have come so far, you are certainly not lazy, but don’t take your husband words personally, he’s fighting his own battle and is more then likely just lashing out. Both of you are going to have bad days sobriety doesn’t mean everyday is going to be amazing, we’re gonna have bad days, months even, we can be in a funk for a while but it will lift.

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So proud of you @anon53116147 you are putting in the work and dont let others opinions detur you from taking care of your condition

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Checking in here, usually I just hit up the gratitude thread but I figured I might as well take a stroll down this thread as well. I’m all on my own for a few days while my bfs out of town, and it can be somewhat challenging. These buddies will help remind me that I am sober even when no one’s looking because it’s what I want for me and the me I want to be for them.

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@SoberGuyUSA Shit, man. Hope your day goes as smoothly as possible. Thinking of you.

@anon53116147 ease don’t listen to anyone but yourself and your doctors about your meds. I’m on meds for anxiety and depression. I have a great psychiatrist. They aren’t hurting me at all and I’m in a really good place where I feel confident in my thought process and decision making capabilities. Meds are NOT a crutch. Your turnaround, Mike, is one for the story books. I’m so over the moon inspired by you and grateful to be on this path with you. You are fucking knocking it out of the park. You are going to continue to help a lot of other with recovery. Just so well done on your part, Mike.

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Today is day 10 for me. Feeling good about life

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Day 5. Today I feel peaceful and motivated. 24 hours mode is really helpful lately. I don’t think in the future too much

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Trying for AF again! Getting ready for work and feel pretty awful. Slept really well last night but have brain fog like crazy. I remember this from 8 months ago when I tried quitting. Anywho…
Have a great day everyone and thank you for being here :yellow_heart:

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Congratulations to your 2 sober weeks!:tada::confetti_ball::tada:

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I’m sorry to read, that your son throwed ip, because you was so afraid of it.:confused:

It sounds as if your husband is in a really bad mood, but you did a lot of stuff for your family despite your mental state. Be kind to yourself.

I don’t know if NA has the same thing about people, who need to be cared of like they were sick, when they treat you unfair?

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Day 46

Going home afterwork. Lately feeling a bit moody, not sure if its weather, or lack of sleep. Anyway some related thoughts that is in my head for today.

As there was adhd mendtioned before, I got some related memories to it.
I am not a doctor here, so will just speak from my expirience and knowledge.

When I was going to school my teacher said to my parents that I have problems with hyperactivity ( I think it is something similar to adhd). Usually at that time, our doctors were old post soviet mentality, where the curing methods were a bit diffefent, more rough in a way. So usually the first suggestion with those conditions were to go to sports.

As I watched Harward school of science conference they were talking that adhd is indeed a sign of higher activity of neurotransmitters in the brain, overall more neurotransmitters and more active brain that if handled correctly can lead in higher mental potential of the individual in the future. What I can add here, from my perspective that can also lead to more problems, more mental problems, probably some tendencies to addictions or indeed when combined with those, could be posible trigger to make the condition worse or overall mental problems.

There is some correlations and it is up to everyone to make their own decisions or further research.

Todays world, western culture have more and more mental problems, more income of information, world gets much more complicated, food quality gets worse and people and kids expecially are much much less active to some cases of Hypodinamy.

I had read wonderful book called Hypodinamy (Don’t remember the author now, it is old book to the surprise!) about activities and how it affects our brain chemistry. Many illnesses like insomnia not directly affected by other core causes, some cases of depression, overall elevated anxiety levels are or can be direct result of highly decreased signals transmission to brain due to lack of physical activity.

I tried medicational protocol for about 4 years more than 10 years ago do to very severe panic attacks and depression. I tried a lot (but that is the whole different story). Mostly the main reason for this was 9 years of night job and out-of-tune biorythms, stress.

But overall, that all was spiritual practice. We like to talk about spiritual practices a lot. But we forget one important moment that we are not aware! **Life is a Spiritual Practice itself! ** Life is a Spiritual Practice itself!!It is an expirience! A miracle!! So let’s not forget a Higher Power here. Without it everything else loses meaning.

Life is a Miracle happening to You

:blue_heart:

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Welcome to the double digits! Nicely done!:tada:

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91 days :muscle: had 5 lower left teeth and one top left :sob:

Had to have injection in the roof of mouth nasty

Got to wait for next appointment to have the right side done ouch :face_with_head_bandage:

Then wait 3 mths for my new shiny doggie dentures lol :joy:

Chilling playing destiny 2

Happy sober Tuesday everyone

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Double digits for you! Well done!:confetti_ball:

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Thank you so much!

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