@Alycia sorry about the intensity of all the emotions but congrats on your year @Markjackson@CueBall8n9 congrats on 50+ days @anon74766472 thank you so much good luck with the packing @Becsta congrats on 1400 days enjoy the colour fun run! I bet the kids will love it @liminal.rehab congrats on 30 days @DryIn785 sorry about your teeth, and your brother @FeelingBetter enjoy skiing! congrats on 30 days
962 days no alcohol.
427 days no cocaine.
9 months no sex.
49 days no vape.
8 days no binge-eating.
Typed all this last night but fell asleep again whilst waiting for my day count for binge-eating to tick over…so, my check-in for yesterday:
Got a maximum of one hour sleep between 2:30-3:30am, and that’s it. I even did a good bedtime routine to try to help but I was just wide awake all night, and I’m not even tired today.
I read 63% of a new book. Did 4 booster sessions from my diabetes course, went for an earlier walk, managed to shower after, well, too long.
Thankfully, and possibly because it’s very Spring-like today, the depression has lifted. I have felt relaxed and peaceful. Did my usual meditations plus extra, did my afternoon walk at 4pm.
Have been reading here throughout the day too. Mostly old posts because I have a thing about having to start from the beginning of a thread and reading it all the way through, so what I’ve been reading is from around this time in 2021.
Not quite sure what to do with myself now the evenings are brighter and darkness comes later. The binge-eating urges still hit me really hard, and I haven’t been able to watch any TV since I stopped, so I’m lost for what to do and I miss the TV in the evenings.
Checking in on day 5 nearly at that 7day clean and sober getting my fitness back up got a marathon to run in 8 weeks gives me something to focus on i believe everything will be ok if I focus on my recovery meetings prayers connections with other addicts
Today is my 30th day. I was a bit mentally frazzled last night and didn’t bother to check the counter. I still love and appreciate y’all for the amazing congratulations and you don’t have to do it again hahaha!
Some other thoughts. I promise it will get better. Thinking about relapse cycles and shame. Is it the big awful brother of guilt in a way? The ‘I as a human being am wrong’ versus I did something wrong? Fueled by seemingly everyone got it right in the first try. I met someone from a group I attended here yesterday and we spoke about someone. Type of you want to hug and take by the hand and who you want to get it so badly and you have to realise that he isn’t there yet. The window to receive help, to get things into his heart, to reach him is not open. So you have to try again and again, show compassion without losing yourself, without losing focus that in the end end end my sobriety comes first. And so I keep on reading and it is often a thing of looking back for me where I have been once and also to have an outlook where I am still struggling.
I think I left behind the actual addiction and I am now in the middle of the real work. And this place gives me the space and open-mindedness of people to reflect on myself and writing it down without too much shame. Because places are scarce where I can do this without being judged or avoided afterwards.
I really need to work on my sleep pattern, waking up at 12 and going to bed at 3 isn’t doing me any favours. Last night I tried going to bed early, but couldn’t fall asleep until… well, 3.
I’m not a morning person, but I really wanna be. Especially now that the weather is getting nicer and next week I’m moving somewhere with a beach. I have this fantasy of starting my days with 7 am walks with my pup on the beach or something poetic like that. Maybe do my meditation on the beach. Hell, even work-out on the beach. Basically do everything by the sea until the sun is too hot and I need to retreat for the day somewhere with air con (probably a coworking spot).
Today I’ve got loads of end-of-the month work to do, BUT the volume is a lot lower than this time last month. Not because there was less to do, but because I left less for the last day. So… progress. Not perfection. But most definitely progress.
Congrats on whatever time you’re sober friend. It’s one day at a time for all of us anyway. Get past a year and the milestone confusion will be over as you will only get a badge once a year .
Day 181
Oh sweet Baby Jesus what a day
We had too many patients today. It’s always that full when there are upcoming holidays. But now I’m free.
I don’t have to work next week So now I’m waiting for my train home, then getting something yummy to munch and then? Being lazy of course
Going to read on here a lot because I had not much time this week for that. But it’s important for me. Being here regularly helps me to stay focused.
Have a beautiful sober day friends, stay strong
Wow, that is a powerful post right there!! That place in between ‘working on staying sober’ and ‘doing the work’. And also finding that empathy and compassion for others on their journey…as well as for you on your own.
Day 244, 8 months. It’s been a little while since I’ve checked in. A LOT has happened. February and March have moved quickly. My MIL was diagnosed with terminal cancer a few weeks ago. There’s a lot of unresolved “stuff” with my husband’s family. We distanced ourselves from his family 15 years ago and only saw my MIL a few times a year, mainly on holidays. With this diagnosis it has put us back in situations with a person who was very abusive verbally and emotionally towards myself and my stepchildren. I can feel that the trauma is still stuck in my body. I had panic attacks last week for 2 days after having to deal with that person. The anger that came bubbling to the surface was unreal. I thought I was not going to be able to control myself from beating her to a pulp. I have never felt like this towards another person. It’s making dealing with all of this all the more difficult. I’m still sober. That has been the farthest thing from my mind actually and I’m grateful for that. I hope everyone is doing well and hanging in there! Have a great day!
Checking in 10 months and 30 days…tomorrow is 11 months.
Im super excited for a double date night with my cousin and his wife. We are going to dinner and then a comedy show.
Im a little nervous we are going to a bar/restaurant for dinner. The last time i was there it was my bachlorette party in 2021. I had an amazing jambalaya that after hours of drinking i ended up puking all over the last bar of the night. Ewww. Im glad thats in the past. Just a little nervous about the bar. I dont believe ill drink. Im just nervous i may be uncomfortable.
Im not gonna future trip. Im gonna enjoy the moment and have my water with lemon and jambalaya.
Congratulations on your day before 11 months!!! Sounds like a fun night!! Maybe something different than the puke jambalaya? Tho I love jambalaya!! Maybe they have a serious shrimp etouffee??
Morning / Midday checkin. I think this is day #52. I didn’t check before typing in this thread.
Got back from my business trip close to
Midnight here last night and it took me forever to fall asleep. Slept in till 10:30am which never happens to me. I’m a 4 to 5am person.
Very groggy at this point and drinking coffee.
So glad to be home and done with travel for a while after two straight weeks of business travel.
I have three quit lot books that I have been reading during the trips and can’t speak highly enough about them. I am an avid reader so I just took a screen shot of the 8 books that I am in. Will post below.
So thankful for this community and all the committed people that have reached out to me over the last two weeks encouraging me and checking in on me. I can honestly say that I love this community.
I am a huge quit lit fan…I never want a drink when reading them. You have some good ones there!! Happy to share more when you need, have been compiling for 10+ years.
but congrats on your year 
good luck with the packing 
congrats on 30 days 
I have felt relaxed and peaceful. Did my usual meditations plus extra, did my afternoon walk at 4pm.
I’m on day 11 off to gym shortly, positive strong strength sent, happy friday 
.
So now I’m waiting for my train home, then getting something yummy to munch and then? Being lazy of course 
That place in between ‘working on staying sober’ and ‘doing the work’. And also finding that empathy and compassion for others on their journey…as well as for you on your own. 
but I also had that “Did I learned something 
Do I really need poison in my life” 
