@CATMANCAM Thanks – dealing with the symptons at a odaat basis. Yeah to getting your patches and getting your new glasses. 
@Scorpn I love hearing that being sober has become a part of your life and takes less effort these days – So inspiring! 
@XXIX the healing process takes long and the guilt and anxiety creep up to make us doubt ourselves and our choices. You are being honest about how you feel (which is hopefully helping you heal) and I am not finding you to be negative. Be well my friend. 
@SoberWalker I like the “winewitch” yeah the thoughts that I could be chilling with a cold beer or take a nice hot bath with a glass of wine (even know my mind saying bottle not glass) keep creeping into my head – well I know I can still do the things and do them with other drinks that will not affect me during or afterwards. Thank you – I don’t think we can get enough reminders to enforce these ideas.
@Mno congrats on what will be another of many breakthroughs on your journey. I am pleased to hear that you were able to have a chitchat out of the blue with a stranger. That is huge. Also – great on you for acknowledging the urge and moving on from it. I think you may be right – the warmer weather and more outdoor activity could be bringing on the urges. Have to be more mindful of them now.
@PinkyP Don’t be disheartened – 19k is a great start and now you can sign up for the same challenge in June — Every step is a step to a healthier you.
@Sabrina80 so so happy to see your post today and hear you are doing better!
@Marc this is a huge start my friend – way to go! 3 weeks and getting through a barbecue weekend. So excited for you!
@SimonSick man that sounds like a dreadful party while trying to start your sobriety journey. So glad that you enjoyed what you did and were able to leave when it became too much. It’s unfortunate but I now know that I have to bring my own na drinks to a party (not comparing the two but I’ve always had to bring food / snacks so that I would have something to eat at social events and now I just have to add on the beverages 
) Hey huge congrats on the 18 days
@Butterflymoonwoman I’m sorry your son is sick - I do hope its nothing serious and can be healed at home… sending healing vibes my friend.
Checking in Sunday afternoon (was about to say morning but its 12:06 - Yikes)
I did not sleep well at all last night so tried to stay in bed longer with my eyes closed but that did not work. Have new pains that are causing it difficult to focus and breathe. It will take a minute to get used to and understand how to navigate with them but for the moment I am exhausted and trying to do whatever i can without movement to keep me distracted. 
More comedy on the agenda… 
It’s beautiful and sunny outside but too hot for me to be outdoors so I’m enjoying from my cozy indoors. I am surrendering to the HP and I know that today will turn out better than it started… Have a wonderful sober Sunday my friends… sending much love 
and I’ve been thinking a lot about how “nice” it would be to have a drink. We went to have a (delicious) Thai food lunch today and drove by an Irish pub and I mourned that I’ll never be able to have fun in a pub again. I know this is diseased thinking. I know I’d have a couple drinks and we’d have fun and then I’d go home and drink myself into oblivion, waking up at 3am feeling sick and ashamed. No thank you!
I’m so sorry that you feel this way – and please note that self harm is an addiction and you are here to try and better yourself. Refraining from self harm is just as exhausting and takes the same will power as trying not to score or take the next drink.
