I’m glad you’re back to swimming and loving it again.
I forgot you all don’t use Fahrenheit over there do you. 
That’s still way to cold for me to be swimming or taking cold showers. ( Maybe you’re part polar bear? 
)
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We don’t …
We also use meters instead of miles 
Crazy folk…
I am looking different after such a session, especially my face and eyes, but I didn’t notice the polar bear until now 
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@ArtMama congrats on 90 days 
@Wakikki sending strength 🩵
@RosaCanDo congrats on 600 days
@Rebabeeba congrats on your year 
@jjcarson92 welcome back 
congrats on your continued sobriety
@ChickenLarb welcome
@Venga030 welcome congrats on 3 days
@Nowenbrace congrats on triple digits 
@Kelwooo congrats on double digits
@TMAC 
🩵
1017 days no alcohol.
482 days no cocaine.
1 day no vape.
So the nicotine demon finally got me yesterday, I made it until 3:30pm then gave in, I hated myself for it, and felt very disappointed in myself, and sad that I couldn’t resist like I had been the previous 10 days that I was on the lower mg patch strength. The nurse has prescribed the higher strength patches that I was on while I was doing well and not suffering with intense cravings, but I wont get them until Friday when I got for my shot.
I couldnt stop bingeing last night, I even drrove to the supermarket after the local shops had closed, just before midnight, because I really wanted to finish the last episode of the program I’ve been watching. I havent gone out late at night for bingeing before, but I think its because of how I was feeling about myself for buying vapes, so hopefully it wont happen again.
Today, has been much better. To my surprise I dont have any cravings at all today, no romanticising either, I feel peaceful. I woke up in the afternoon, because I was awake til the early hours. My cats woke me up at 11am, I fed them, took my meds, and had to go back to sleep. Since waking up properly, I’ve done my morning routine, and been for my lake walk.
🩵
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It’s funny you say that because the second I get a job I have non alcoholic rose to celebrate with the wife and dancing sounds great too
You are so kind for your words of encouragement
Stay awesome as you are 
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Thanks friend – That’s a great way to celebrate – I do hope you and the misses get to enjoy some NA rose and have a dance or two.
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Checking in. Day 229
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@CATMANCAM No hating yourself please. You have no cravings today for the nicotine? I am not sure of your not smoking journey and I want you to do what is right for you. The craves will come and the craves will go. It sounds like they were there last night and they are gone today. Has anyone suggested that when the craves come you sit back and let it happen without giving in? Then they will go? Let them wash over you? Without giving in. Throw the cigarettes out.
Right now I don’t think you have a patch on unless you have the lower dose on and you do not have the crave.
A higher patch will put a higher level of nicotine in you. For me it intensified my wanting to smoke, to the point of taking the patch off, smoking ten cigarettes and putting a new one on.
You are feeling peaceful today. I know that a lot of this is very hard for you, as it is for everybody, and I am not trying to disrupt the boat or upset you.
I think, I am not sure, that you can cut the patches in half ( I am not sure) Congratulations on your days free of alcohol and cocaine.
Big hugs … I am on your side.
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You are a feeling person and that is wonderful. Glad yall had this special time together and he was a part of this new part of your life. I also like the idea of the Face Times or whatever w Chief in the pics also. Big hugs for you, I am sorry you are hurting rt now although it is for a good cause. Big hugs
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@JazzyS God bless you always!
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Checking in
Day 465
Today has been a weird day. I slept awful last night. Had incredibly bad stomach cramps 
I woke up very tired. Once my son went off to school, i ended up sleeping for another 1.5 hours then woke up to do dishes and then exercise. I had a decent workout which im happy about. Picked up my son from the bus and then went to grab a pizza for supper. Im currently trying to work on a couple of resentments that have creeped up. Well, they have been there for some time now but they are sort of “just below enough the surface” that it didnt bother me too much. Something will happen and it will resurface these resentments. So im going to pray about it tonight 
Funny thing is, is that these 2 people dont even know that they rent space in my head. So who is it really hurting?! Lol ME. Anyway, im grateful to be clean and sober. Hope everyone is doing well today!
Much love 
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1,333 Days of Recovery
Today, I reached 9 years of being cigarette free. 
I am very, very scared, anxious, & depressed. Something very bad is gonna happen to me tomorrow morning, but I don’t want to talk about it. I just wanted to check in. I am terrified. 
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Amazing work that you are putting in for yourself.
I know tomorrow is scary but try to take a deep breathe and focus on now. I am sending good vibes your way that tomorrow goes better than anticipated. You are making remarkable strides Alex and I do hope that others will be able to see this too. 
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Checking in 421 days 
Finally booked my psych appointment and picked up my script for meds.
I don’t know why that was so hard to do, but I made the time to get the help. I’ve been trying so hard to struggle through and help myself but I just can’t do it on my own anymore.
Being sober AND showing up to help myself is something I’m really going to have to work on.
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Days
227 substance free
144 self harm free
Today was a good day. I worked early, got a certificate for my job, took the kids to play, and went on a walk in nature.
Nothing too stressful.
Feeling better every day
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#Day 1709 
Woke up very early (5 o’clock) but couldn’t got back to sleep. Today? Work.
Had a very nice walk in the evening and saw a Velduil/Short-eared owl! 
Have a good thuesday all
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Do you mean that you hope not responding to this feeling with binging again or that your hope you dont continue vaping?
I have the impression that there is something going on at yours and not in the positive direction. You had many abstinence points and they are getting less.
Some time ago you wrote about applying for a job again? All I write is not meant as an offence but I know from myself being all day at home doing nothing wouldn’t be good for my mental health. I need social connections irl and if it’s only colleagues and I need structure (I know you have a daily routine) and one can discuss this, I need some purpose why I get up every morning.
These are just my thoughts.
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Checking in.
Grateful for pieces of thought this early morning.
I remember back in 2020 when I was sent to full time home office. I hated my current job and didn’t come along with the colleagues. They were only there for job and little they give away from their private life. It’s a thing you can do. I wasn’t there at this point in my life. I took it personally. I learnt (believe it or not) it in meetings when people talked about why they didn’t like to exchange private things at work. Ahhh, true. Okay. But during these 12 weeks my mental health declined drastically. Being alone all day, in front of a desktop hating the job. Going back and forth to the fridge.
I went to therapy shortly after. And always it’s immediately getting better when I have people around me, understanding me or not judging me. This revelation cost the insurance company a lot of money. 
And I am getting better to choose social contacts. Not perfect. Still not there to go on meetup hikes stating 10km in 5nhours, 20 people coming. I don’t know if I’ll ever be there. But I go to the canteen with colleagues. And I also need feedback from people. Example: when during lunch they ask me as they see me coming in their direction heading for lunch: ah, Franzi Tu viens manger avec nous? (If I would be joining them) and I say NO (in a tone not intended) and I see their facial expressions. And I can correct myself saying: no, I maen nice no, I just prefer to take a walk. I need external feedback to get along better with people.
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If there are resources available to you to assist financially, do it. You have made mistakes and you have grown through them. You don’t need to punish yourself. As yourself why you feel you don’t deserve help. Everyone deserves a hand up when in desperate need. My 2 cents.
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You’ve grown and learned. Worked on it hard.
I think that’s human communication, it is an exchange and we should be able to do this, otherwise we aren’t doing our complete part on the communication by paying attention to to the other person(s). You’re doing great.
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I suppose it depends on who you are asking for the financial assistance from…If its your parents or something there is no shame in asking them for help if needed.
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