1438
Have as good a day as you all can friends. Sober and clean. Love.
Hey all checking in Tuesday morning. Had an up and down couple of days, but I think that fog I was in cleared up a little bit. Starting to feel more myself again. Had a very early gym workout and now gonna start the work day. Meeting tomorrow night at 6, looking forward to it. Have a great day guys.
@Butterflymoonwoman Dana, you are kicking addiction’s ass.
Keep doing what you’re doing. 
I ended up joining a social group that promote health, so no drinking, smoking or drug use. I met a guy on my first outing and he is 13 years sober and a health nut. We had a date, it was nice. But even if he and I dont work out, it made me see I want someone sober. I need it for me, for my daughters, for my relationships. Im sold on sobriety, praise god 
Day 350. So my second counselor (I have two) recommended a place called m.hab…this place has a pretty bad rep with lots of drugs being around. It’s a old college dorm so it’s a single bed unit with just a fridge and microwave, you share a shower with a guy next door. And you use the kitchen with everyone downstairs. I’m kinda saying like fuck that I’m not doing that bc just no I want my girls to be able to stay weekends and be with them. It’s all the way on the other side of town so it’s gonna be hard to get to college…busses here do not to to the college I’ve already looked into it. Anyways so that’s my choice or move back to Tupper. Idk doesn’t sound like much better choice either, no job, same old shit, no gyms. I want to say yes at the same time bc my girls need me man, they have we have missed out on such precious times that I am supposed to be teaching them. Addie’s still not off training wheels, which isn’t a big deal but if I was home we could get her off them. My mom is limited on what she can and will do. So yeah man I feel fucking lost. I gotta leave this up to my higher power and follow my heart but ATM I can’t decipher which is my heart and which is my mind. Much love fam
Sometimes all we need to do is rest. As @Dazercat mentioned, at the beginning of sobriety it is totally normal to feel tired as your body is healing. They say our cells go to work repairing all the damage we inflicted during our slumber.
I am sorry that you are feeling depressed. That can be taxing on your motivation. When i was in a bit of depression, i started watching /listening to comedy non stop. I found Sarah Millican to be an absolute sad mood buster. Sarah Millican she has many YouTube videos to watch.
I do hope your other medical tests you recently had went well. Best of luck with the upcoming stress test.
Wishing you a beautiful sober day!
I don’t really know what your hometown situation is. But I’m not sure the other place sounds like it would be condusive to your recovery. Unless you think you can keep yourself absolutely clear of the bullshit going on there. I’m sure your girls do miss you and vice versa. I’m sure whatever choice you make will workout for you as long as you stay the path of recovery. Hoping the best for you.
Thanks man. This place is supposed to be a recovery place, like across from it is a recovery center where they have meetings. But the building it’s self is known for having about half and half 50 percent sober 50 percent still actively using. But idk it just still does not seem ideal. And my home town situation is just I have lots of cravings and is just kind of triggering it’s a very small town so everybody knows everybody. Will see what happens thanks for your response man I appreciate it very much.
That’s a tough one. I really don’t have any advice. I do know that you are stronger now, so in a place with users around, back in Tupper, you can be true to yourself and make it work.
Love Sarah Millican! The mixture of her innocent appearance, her accent and then the often quite crude jokes is just killer!
Day 74 and still going. It doesn’t even feel odd anymore. Going on dates soon and have no thought of budging or slipping. Hope all well with everyone ODAAT
2 mo, 2 days. I’ve had so many great things happen and more than a few lousy. Interesting how I used to think drinking was the bridge between the good and the bad because it blurred the lines until nothing looked bad (except for the next day). These days it’s all on me to reconcile all the things to figure the best path forward. It’s exhausting, but I am becoming proud of the thought and labor I put into decisions. Before, the thought and labor was so exhausting and yielded nothing immediately satisfying, that I wanted to numb, to quiet my overthinking, to make it easier to relate to other people and just move on. Now I’m seeing all that thought and labor is very much me, and it’s fine. It just requires a little more patience and space for overthinking and emotions, but the wave always passes, and then I am decisive, witty, caring, and kind of awesome. I wish I’d figured this stuff out earlier. Maybe I wasn’t ready. Maybe I’m a slow learner. Maybe this is another wave of overthinking. The only definite is that I am sober today. Because of that, I know I will sort the rest out with some tears, laughs, and flair.
Totally agree! Ive now watched all her stuff on YouTube probably a dozen times and still get belly rolling laughter.
I couldnt believe how just laughing at jokes non stop got me out of my rut - was so damn greatful for the healing power of laughter and her in particular (other comedians were good but not like this for me). At that time i didnt think i would ever be “me” again and the sadness was overwhelming. I did send her a hearfelt thank you letter (corny i know) - not aure if she received.
Day 122.
I feel exhausted. Mentally. Still loopy, but no longer hyper loopy, just normal loopy. It’s really hard to focus on getting anything done, but I am trying my best. I really need a nap or something.
Hello all,
Checking in on Day 1,753 Sober. I attended an event over the weekend and there was a lot of alcohol and marijuana there. Watching people partake reminded me that it’s a personal choice to use these substances and ultimately its no one’s fault but our own. I didn’t stay that long as the people there got on my nerves pretty quick.
God Bless!
Day 1,068 clean and sober today. Had an appointment over the phone with a doctor last night about depression etc. I should be picking up my prescription sometime today. I have been off of them for a long time but this heaviness is getting really old. Have an amazing day everyone, I’m proud of you and love you guys 
800 days!!! You are awesome 
Over a year sober…That is great! I know its not easy…
Hi Joy, loved your post! Thinking wasn’t my strong point also,. I’ve said I want someone to think for me LOL. I guess that was a cry for help to HP.
We’re in this together choosing sobriety and fellowship.
Love absolute will see us through 
Ah man Michael- this is really between a rock and a hard place. I wish you luck with whatever you decide. Do know in your heart the situation is not permanent.
You are doing so well and i hope to see you continue your sobriety. Make sure you are double equipped with your tools so that you are not at the mercy of your urges.
In cases where you cant get to the gym - do excercises at home – so many ways to work out without equipment and still release the pent up tension and gain positive energy.
Sending you strength
