It is true for us all. It’s hard work putting yourself out there, to meet new people. Particularly if you’re very out of practice at it!
Maybe I come across differently here (online bravery!), but I’m extremely introverted. I’m not shy exactly, I can hold my own in a conversation with new people. It’s actually just getting myself to that point that’s really hard. Introversion is a bit of a curse, you feel very demotivated from getting involved in things. I love my space, and that can feel very easily encroached on.
But, we are the authors of our own misery. Loneliness is a horrible feeling, but by doing nothing, we change nothing.
It’s been on my mind to get involved in walking groups here, for example. I know there will be great people at these walks. But it’s like an invisible force holding me back
How about you Mark? Is there anything you’ve been thinking about doing?
Oh such a challenge area for me!! I too am very introverted. It crossed my mind to walk at a local mall…then have a coffee after. Could turn into a conversation or too?? I forgot about my goal of hitting a bunch of different coffee shops. That might result in a chance encounter also? Still working on this😃
I will say though, an organised group walk could really seal the deal. You have a whole bunch of people that are there, likely for the same reason! Do something fun, healthy, and meeting other people.
Meeting people by chance is a nice idea, but maybe you could force your own hand by doing a group walk. No chance meeting there, it’s already arranged
I had a good group therapy session yesterday. I said what I had to say. The therapist handled it well (and gained some respect from me) We had a good talk about why we are all there -for ourselves- and how our differing realities can coexist while still caring for each other, and having fruitful sessions. So for now I’m not leaving the group and I do feel a whole lot better about things and myself.
Biking there and home again following a bit different route, taking me more over small tracks through the woods, avoiding busy roads as much as possible, helped too I am sure.
And coming here before and voicing some of my troubles helped so much as well. Thanks for helping me friends. I still find it hard at times to accept help while I love to give it. Next to speaking out for myself, me learning it’s OK to receive help too, is a big part of my journey of discovery. Life is a two way street and we’re in it together, each on our own roads. Thanks so much for being here all. It helps so much. XXX
Checking in on Day 1,757 Sober…My brother’s stepson bottomed out hard with alcohol and is in a pretty bad place. He has a long history of such problems. No local rehab places have openings right now for people on Medicaid, which I was surprised by.
It’s causing a lot of anguish for my brother and his wife. Nothing I can do about it really. My attitude about him goes back and forth from a live and let live to a live and let die mentality because he has always been sort of a liability for my brother’s family, I dunno…
That would be better. I will think about that and do a little digging. I really struggle making those type decisions. But like you say…some effort will be needed to reduce loneliness.
I managed to buy only healthy stuff in the grocery store today, after what I ate this week that’s a good thing (cake and chips).
The back is better but it takes time.
Next week I’ll walk more again after work. Biking is nice but my body responds better to walking and I know I can loose weight with it.
Laundry is done and now? I could clean the apartment…I should clean the apartment But I’m lazy
Good morning checking in on a rainy but sober day 32. I’m headed out to buy some things for my son’s birthday party so that should take all day and keep me busy. I don’t know how you guys feel about IKEA but when I visited for the first time 3 months ago I thought it was the most annoying store ever. The reason behind this was because it would take forever for me to walk back out to the car to get another drink. What should have been an hour of shopping turned into three hours of frustration bc I needed more. Today I look forward to strolling the halls sober like hitting a walking trail but with pillows lol. Stay sober family and let’s continue the journey !!!
Day 354. Good morning with my girls, for the most part. I’m really kind of upset with myself bc I never see my girls and I find myself getting frustrated and snappy sometime, like it’s really upsetting bc I need to just seriously be in the moment, I won’t get these precious times ever again. Anyways we’re going to go for a bike ride, my mom is seriously the most caring and giving person I have ever met, she always puts everyone first. She knows that Gary Fisher bike I had doesn’t fit me well and wanted me to have something nice again so she got me this bike, it’s brand new and I literally got the best deal on it I was pretty excited about that and hope soon I can give to other what was given to me. Much love everyone here’s a pic of the new bike
@icebear How are you doing with being off the medication? I’m sorry to hear about your evaluation – I know it’s hard to shake these things off but do try to learn from it (if it is a learning thing) and grow from it. Holding onto these feelings can start to eat away at you. I do hope you get out in that garden today. Working with mother earth is so healing! @Scorpn LOL girl I saw the 160 and was like naw that can’t be right — so glad that we got that figured out. I am so glad that you did not give in to the thought of using. You are super strong woman and after the past month I can understand your brain trying to trick you into this but today and not for the foreseeable future! @Juli1 I am loving your positive attitude! Saw your plants – my goodness those babies are thriving. Keep up the amazing work on yourself @Mno so glad to hear that your therapy session went well and you are rid of the anxiety from it. That bike ride sounds amazing – Always around such beautiful scenery. Wishing you the best in letting others in to help you in your time of need @SoberGuyUSA I am so sorry – this is gotta be very hard on everyone! I do understand your mentality – it’s hard to be put through the same bs over and over again with no signs of change. I have had to remind myself that we are all doing our best to get through this life. Some are better at it than others. I do hope he gets the help he so clearly needs and that he wants to get better. It is truly a tough spot my friend sending you and your brothers family love and support. @Cjp I love it – Boscoe’s day out – have a blast at the AA meeting / picnic @Time2Live84 best of luck with strolling in IKEA today. It is definitely better to do sober and not aching for the fix. I try to avoid at all costs as the layout is super crazy and I don’t like that I have to go through the whole place just to exit. But I’m not one to stroll and shop – I shop with a purpose. My friends would always want to go there when they visited from Ontario and it would drive me absolutely bonkers. @anon53116147 Oh so happy that you are spending time with the girls – yes, it gets hard to be in the present when you start realizing how much you are missing but take a deep breath and try as you said – these precious moments do not repeat. Enjoy them to the fullest and Damn – what a nice set of wheels – Hope you all enjoy that bike ride.
Checking in on Saturday morning - woke up and took me a minute to realize where I was. I was in the midst of a super intense dream (which for the life of me I can’t remember). Woke up feeling bewildered (not sad / angry / happy or … just confused i think). Oh well - my parents showed up early to meditate/ pray so I didn’t have much time to analyze the feeling / dream and now it feels like it was eons ago. All good with my hot cup of coffee and getting the energy needed to start the day. Have a wonderful sober day my friends
I wanted to say Mike, I admire your commitment during the last year, day by day, step by step. All the shit that happened after your relapse episode. And how far you have come now. I don’t really understand your conflict with the housing but I thought to myself that often things will resolve on its own. I was so so so stressed last year not finding an apartment at all. I got the only one I applied for. I was lucky probably.
I think also that now that you are sober, you are a much better Dad than using. Maybe you were there but now you are present when you are there. And I think your girls feel the difference.
(cake and chips).
But I’m lazy 
