@mno glad you made it home safely from your bike ride and in time to not get soaked – I agree that it can be too much to exercise when temps are that high @nastya_is_fighting I am so sorry that your class and the damn teachers are so rude / mean. This is so triggering and please know that what they are saying is totally false! I am glad you are not going to attend the party. Please do concentrate on yourself and your wellbeing. @2jtravnz I am so sorry that the addict is so alive in you today. I do hope that you are able to dig deep in your chest of tools and fight off these urges. You are going through a lot emotionally and this is the time to remember that alcohol has not place in comforting or consoling you. You are stronger and healthier without it. Sending you strength my friend. Be well @kelwooo this is definitely a struggle early on as you are re-discovering yourself. Stay strong my friend and enjoy the journey of self-discovery @powerfulmileelamica So glad to hear that the interview went well. I know its not ideal but it does seem to have a few good points. The main concern is the environment but with school and your time at the gym you could be successful in keeping your head down and just work on yourself. You you’re yourself the best. Something to help you till you get more grounded? I do hope all went well on the school front. Man — you are 2 days from your 30!!! Woot woot indeed ! @sabrina80 UGH! I Hate it when the body is not feeling well and the weather is miserable – a recipe for a crappy mood. Sorry that you will not have much me time today – hope the training goes well and you are able to relax some afterwards. @catmama23 listen to your body and rest. In the early stages the exhaustion can creep up on you and allow the addict brain to gain a bit more power. You are doing great my friend and yes – smart to be on alert especially if the hormonal fluctuations are also at play. Stay strong!
Checking in on Hump day –
182 days (aka 6 months) alcohol and weed free
597 days cigarette free
A lovely start to the day with a bit of movement. I am slowly getting my emotional strength back and don’t feel so exhausted mentally. The physical will still take a bit of time to catch up but i’m sure it will catch up. I am enjoying the slow pace these days and taking things ODAAT! Hope you are all staying strong and enjoying your sober / addiction free Wednesday! Sending much love
Well just got back from the mood and memory testing. I tested pretty low in the percentile, I don’t even really remember what he said, it was 14 perentile for one thing and 8 percentile for something else. He said I definitely have a learning disability which kind of discouraged me from wanting to pursue school, but he said they will right accommodations to school for me. Definitely can’t let it get me down need stay up and positive. Much love
I would not want to do the memory test!
Don’t let it define or change anything for your future. You are doing really great, Mike. Follow through with your goals.
Omg I’m SO overwhelmed at work. Today is CRAP. Endless emails and new projects in my queue. I’ve started this new thing where when the stress gets to be too much I bang my hands on my head really hard and it hurts and now I have a headache. I really want to scream and throw things but our walls are paper thin. I hate my job so much and I feel so overwhelmed and stressed.
My friend, please work on healthier ways of dealing with the stress at work (or anywhere)! That’s not OK! Also may start thinking about a different career path when your current one makes you so unhappy?
My goodness this job is really taking everything from you and it’s so not cool to cause yourself harm in trying to deal with stress. My head got a jolt just envisioning this technique. So many hugs your way…
I do know how stressed you have been at this job for months now - any progress in your job hunt? I wish you the best in being able to leave this toxic environment.
Take care of yourself - hope that headache goes away soon
I definitely feel trapped… I’ve been trying to find a new job for like 8 months and am coming up empty for a variety of reasons… I also need the money and insurance. I’ve been trying to focus on the good parts of it (like working from home and being able to do some daily recovery activities) but it is so freaking stressful and I don’t enjoy the work at all. @Mno i do feel like I need a new career but have no idea where to start and can’t imagine taking that on right now… but… I have hope for the future
@JazzyS i know it’s so bad and it hurts, but somehow doing it relieves my stress. It’s like an intense release. It’s a habit I’ve picked up recently (not often though). I’m finally seeing the psychiatrist tomorrow… couldn’t come soon enough
Hey Cat! I had a crazy job that I quit when I got sober. Not saying you should do that, but if you need someone to listen and talk thru things, I’m happy to be there. I believe you have my number, but if not, I can DM you.
18 days and feeling good was a bit quiet on here yesterday just felt absolutely exhausted but feeling good today.
I signed up to a abseil for the children’s health Foundation charity in Ireland for August the 25th I will be climbing to the top of croke park stadium and will be abseiling down onto the Hogan stand absolutely bricking it as iam not great with heights but looking forward to it
I had a lovely morning with the horses, they always brighten my day. I believe it’s in the works that one of the other people who boards her horses at the same ranch wants me to take one of hers as she doesn’t have time for him. He’s a delightful little Arab, young, quite opposite to my big older draft, so I’m hopeful that’ll transpire. He loves interacting with people as does Harry. On the where-to-live front, my wife & I have agreed to buy a second home in Taos so I don’t have to do Airbnb’s anymore. It’s a bit unorthodox as we’ll likely spend a lot of time apart, but I don’t necessarily think that’s a bad thing, wink wink . Anyway, I’ve had zero cravings so far & feel content with all the big happenings in my life.
Firstly, although I know you have had long streaks of sobriety your recent relapse may have affected the score. Secondly, your tester was right, they will make accommodations and as an adult you can get advice on how to structure your study to suit you. My son has low working memory (and ADHD as I have mentioned). To get him to remember things he has to do bite sized study regularly. But he can remember stuff. And he has 14 year old level vision for the future (i.e. none). You have goals and vision for who you want to be to motivate you. You can do it.
449 days sober happy dance
Feeing good, got some exercise in, I’m doing great at work, things are really good with the fam. I’m very grateful
Wishing you all a good day
Love your attitude. Do not let this be defeat – it’s perfect to find out now and get the assistance and accommodations needed to pursue your education goals. I really can see you helping so many others so do not give up on your dream. @noshame it’s odaat – you have the desire to no longer vape and you will make that happen. Hold onto the feeling that it tasted nasty and gave you a bad feeling when the urge should arise. Wishing you the best of luck @catmama23 glad you are seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow. Would air punching with all your might be something that you might want to try? Stress balls (I’ve had to go through a few of them as I’ve shredded them with squeezing too hard)… anything is better than taking it our on yourself – the energy you are releasing is being released right back into you. You need to release it into something else so that it does leave you (preferably without causing more pain in the process) @dolse71 33 months — nice angle number my friend!
Checking in on Wednesday evening
It was a good day with little pain and the fatigue was manageable. I did go for a swim with my brother and parents which was real nice – took a lot to get my mom to go (she doesn’t know how to swim and is afraid of the water so this was huge). She had a blast and wants to go at 6 am tomorrow - we’ve created a monster The water was not too rough on my skin and being able to move freely with the fluidity of water felt so relaxing. I hope everyone had a wonderful day! Sending much love
it helps knowing that
. Anyway, I’ve had zero cravings so far & feel content with all the big happenings in my life.
The water was not too rough on my skin and being able to move freely with the fluidity of water felt so relaxing. I hope everyone had a wonderful day! Sending much love