I don’t think anyone here is tired of your low numbers. we all understand that sobriety isn’t easy and the fact that you’re tired of not seeing bigger numbers is good, it shows you truly want a change
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just had a tiny wake up call for my eating disorder.
I’ve been eating next to nothing. didn’t think anyone noticed. I know my parents don’t. well I ate 6 nuggets and fries for lunch. an average meal. and my grandpa said “I haven’t seen you eat that much in a long time” I had no idea he noticed
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Thank you so much 
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Checking in
Alcohol day 1402
Disordered eating: day 1
As a member of AA I believe in doing the steps, doing them thoroughly and doing them as many times as it takes. So I’m going through them again with a new sponsor. Going through Step 4 for 2.5 hours today was hard but enlightening. We’re halfway done. More work to do and more will be revealed. I’m thankful for this forum. There is so much acceptance and grace here. I need it.
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@Bomdhil thank you!
I do better when I have daily visuals and inspiration to get me tthrough, so this helps a lot!
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You’re doing amazing Dana. Keep up the good work, proud of you and your hubby
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Hi. I’m new. First post. Day 15. This looks like a wonderful forum and exactly what I was looking for but I am a bit confused about the organization, categories etc. I apologize if I am putting this in the wrong place. Maybe it would be less confusing on a desktop computer? So I have made it through the first 2 weeks. I haven’t figured out what my program, plan, or routine is yet. Or if I am doing AA or something else. I’m reading quitlit, posting and reading every day (but have been looking for a sober forum to call home, this could be it). I’m trying to do as little extracurricular life activities as possible the first 30 days. I can’t figure the order of the posts on here. I see some sober check topics but it says they are from last year or older. Well anyway, hello sober and aspiring peoples!
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Welcome!! I am one of the moderators!! You got close…I am going to move your check in to the Check in thread, I think that is what you are looking for…hold tight!!!
Additionally …you can also start your very own check in thread, where you can update us on your day to day. Or, you can do both!!
For now, I will move you over to check in and I bet you will get lots of welcomes!!!
Glad you found us and congratulations on your 2 weeks!!!
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Welcome @Genf congrats on getting through your first two weeks! Those truly were a battle for me. I hope you read around lots. If you use the search function above and filter the results to “latest” that will get you the livelier threads.
Welcome again. This community is amazing and supportive. I hope you visit often!
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Sober Billy my Sober Buddy 
Love my gift!!! Thank you
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Checking in on a late day 52. Got my last bit of money today and put away for my security deposit on mhab. Knocked out a tattoo tonight, and hoping maybe I can do some tattoos to keep me afloat. Also even maybe thinking of selling my machine, idk lol. Just hanging with the guys in the TV room, probably going to go up and lay down. Had some good groups today. Idk not much going on, saw one of my buddies getting married today, kinda hurt he didn’t invite me. Not that I would of probably went because way to much drinking and he still actively uses meth, you know what’s crazy is his wife doesn’t even know he does meth at all, like she is completely clueless too it. But idk why I am making that my business, anyways much love
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Thank you Mike! Im also proud of you and everything your accomplishing and doing to better ur life! 
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Welcome GenF
Congratulations on your 15 days.
Keep reading around and join in when you’re comfortable. If you got any questions just ask. The lights are always on and someone is always willing to help. We were all new once. It was tricky for me to navigate the threads, old ones new ones first post last post etc…. but I finally figure it out and I have met some wonderful people on the way.
ODAAT
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Hello all. I was feeling like my friends weren’t there for me the last few days. I’m now realizing i am feeling like i need to be wanted. I don’t want to act out sexually or use any substances. I don’t even have much of an appetite. But i feel i have no purpose except my son. He seems the only person that wants me around. I feel like all of my progress is going backwards… besides using. I’ve had some self harm thoughts… i know i won’t do anything but the thoughts come up. One day i love myself the next day i want to die…wtf. I’m on meds for depression and bipolar yet this feeling comes around at times. I messaged my sponsor. I feel like I’m failing recovery all of the sudden
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Huge hugs friend 
You are very much cared for. I personally dont think that ur failing recovery. You havent acted out in old ways and im soo very proud of u for that! Recovery is definitly not a straight line. It goes forwards and backwards and that line can go all over the place as we keep reaching for our destination. Ive been feeling like my recovery isnt as good either lately. But i sort of feel like when things arent the best, its just a sign that we need to up our recovery game. Get back to the basics of what works and keep plugging away at it. One day at a time. What activities have helped you in the past to get back on track?
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Welcome! And congratulations on 15 days!
We’re glad you’re here
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Love this. Keep going one day at a time!
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Day 279
Feeling rough around the edges today.
Frustrated, bothered, annoyed, surprised, and yet not surprised…
But whatever. It’s coming to an end. I’ve got another day down, and tomorrow one way or another the kids get to bounce in a bouncy castle. The rented one is more private, but if it’s not available, then I’ll take them to the indoor bounce center. We’re all due for some fun…
I hope y’all are ok.
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@Butterflymoonwoman recovery is the journey, not the desitation. So beautifully said.
I am sitting on my porch swing my husband got me for mothers day feeling incredibly greatful. Took my daughter to a birthday party today where I stayed and met one of her friends parents. Ended up having a very intense exchange about whats been going on in our lives, with the mom and grandmother, and though it felt awkward for me to talk about I also feel it is wrong in a way for me to say my sister died. Not wrong, but just…a silent cloak around domestic violence and even infant death, that I feel in a way its important when I feel able to say what really happened and to share a bit about what we have been through these past 3 years. I didnt cry, and didnt want to overtake the conversation or put weight around her sons birthday party, but thr couple I met today have been fosterinf and are trying to adopt…we ended up talking about my nephew, as we live in such a small community people know he lives with us, and our challenges. I sat with myself after, and imagined my trauma self…a trigger is when I feel poked, and while I knew I would likely feel that later - and sharing about myself, because I am very private and reserved - makes me feel raw, vulnarable and even a bif ashamed. So I sat with myself and my trauma self and instead of seeing it as a poke, I imagined I was putting a salve on the wound. Just because I tpuch the wound doesnt mean I am just being triggered. And I sat with the 16 yr old me whos like jesus christ I cant handle this, and said its okay…maybe you feel you cant, but I know we can and this is okay. Its hard and weird, and theres no right path or guide book to get us through, but today we talked about where we are. And it has been strange, living in a smalk town - in a place we all love and have come to love, but being literally alone in what we are dealing with in that we have not talked to those people we meet as we try to form new relationships about what we are actually going through. Anyway, sober today. A strange, beautiful day. Meditated again with my son tonight for a bit, trying to work these things into the moments life gives me instead of beating myself up about any exact routine. Im here today for a reason, and I just want to hang the fuck on. Wishing you all another 24. Xo.
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@juli1 I agree with @sadmemequeen 100%. I do love your determination and will to want to be sober. You will make this happen. Do not give up on yourself – you are doing awesome my friend. Yes – FUCK Alcohol!
@sadmemequeen I am grateful that you are begging to eat a bit more and I’m sure more people than you know have noticed.
@crystalclear So glad that you were able to get a sponsor. Grateful for the steps and the strength they provide. Wishing you luck with your journey
@genf welcome to the community and a huge congrats on your 15 days! I think you are attacking sobriety with a clear head and right focus – I have not started with any program yet but do find this community to be super helpful with advice, support and also a great source for mindless entertainment like memes, jokes and riddles to keep your mind off of the urges. Putz around a bit and you will get the hang of it rather quickly – I do prefer using a laptop for the app just because of the screen size and being able to type faster without so many errors. Glad to have you here with us – hope to see you around.
@anon53116147 Grateful that you are enjoying doing tattoo’s again – you have a great gift. “selling the machine”? - are you referring to your tattoo machine? Even when we leave our past lives it still stings sometimes not being a part of it – you are in a much better place now my friend. Doing awesome and having many things work out for you…making new friends in the process. Its not always easy but keep looking forward
@mewmcmew its not unusual to feel the need to be wanted. You are human and want to have a connection. I do hope that you are able to find a way to get out and create connections for yourself through group meetings or meet-ups. This one thing I believe will be huge for you. I know that in isolation or with loneliness you can start sinking into a dark space. Sending you loads of strength and love so that you keep positive and stay on a positive track. I do hope that your sponsor got back with you. We are here if you need to talk. Are you also able to see a therapist on a one on one basis?
@scorpn sorry about the blah day – healing and positive vibes coming your way – it will get better love. I am super excited for a day spent in a bouncy castle. I’m sure you all will have a blast – Happy Sunday to you and yours Renee
@CATMANCAM Hope you got rid of your migraine and were able to make it to drumming today
Checking in sober on Saturday evening
206 days weed and alcohol free
621 days cigarette free
Good day today - i focused on living (took breaks when the fatigue or pain got real bad) - did a ton of self-care and great healthy eating. my brother and i have kicked off the scary movie season (LOL) - watched two tonight in double speed - Evil Dead Rise and Angry Black Girl and Her Monster --i must be becoming numb to these cause they are not scary to me… the hunt will continue 
Off to bed --have a wonderful sober night / day my friends…sending much love
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