Checking in day 5, no walk this morning as my husband is off and did the walking duties so I got to sleep a little longer, definitely needed it, its Friday, I’m not as scared as my first weekend maybe a little more prepared mentally, just trying to get through today, tomorrow I’ll deal with tomorrow, hope everyone has a great day 
@Mischa84 that is a massive achievement 
@SadMemeQueen glad the interview went well, hope it works out for you 
Checking in for day 3.
We are invited to a wedding tomorrow and I hope to find nice people to talk to. That was rather difficult in this constellation at the last weddings…
Yesterday was a difficult day per se. I went with my boyfriend to a trial training session at a nearby gym. Both (my partner and the very experienced trainer) couldn’t understand how it could be that you can’t feel your muscles. (especially with certain exercises and heavy weight). They were visibly overwhelmed and tried a few things. I felt really uncomfortable after a while. Like I was some kind of deficient alien. I’m thinking about scheduling another trial (alone) and stating my training goal “I want to notice something in my muscles”.
I can TOTALLY RELATE!!! There was something in the past yr and a half about half open, or left behind drinks…its like oh hello there. Like who doesnt love room temp half fizzed out beer?? I so appreciate you sharing this bc it is me so completely! Finding those lottle beers was almost like permission for me to have it.
I also laughed when you saif you never left a beer unfinished. I remember thinking that when I first met my hubby, 12 years ago and he’d have parties or a few years later we’d have parties in our home…and it was the first time in my life I was partying (sober) in this kind of crowd, and while cleaning up in the morning I’d pour out quite a few left overs and just realized like wow. THIS is a different thing frpm what I’m used to 
Hey all, checking in on day 1174. I hope everybody has a good one!
Day 230.
So today I feel completely and totally drained. But I’m here. I’m still breathing. And I’m sober.
I also think the way I’m feeling is connected to the monthly torture my body insists on putting me through. It explains the raging and the emotions.
And that’s why I’m grateful to be sober. However shit I feel right now, drinking would make it 10x worse.
Nice one Mischa
I think that’s the hard part - the unexpected triggers. We can plan for foreseeable triggers, but the sneaky ones are those we don’t see coming.
Well done for dealing with it as you have.
Have an ace day xx
Day 39 check in.
Day 326
Yesterday I stayed home from work, and today I went in but was told I should go home. I have some kind of cold or flu. All of this constant running has caught up and I just want to sleep.
Sending you all hugs 
0.34 no DOC of marijuana
44.65 no smoking 
113.57 no alcohol
Yes I did it again, smoked CBD with that little bit of THC. It’ll get me if I keep doing it I know it. Just got to keep trying. That’s all I can do
44.65 no smoking. I’m back at the nic lozenges. I feel sad when I don’t have the lozenges. I wonder if that’s normal?
113.57 no alcohol. Atleast I have that time in there
Let’s gave a good day ok
If we woke up this morning then we are truly blessed and who knows… today could be the best day of our lives and we might not even notice 
Throw on some music and have a good day
I’m on my way to work in about 1 hour for a 8hour day + 1 hour lunch
Letssss gooo
Feel better asap
Get some rest and enjoy your day off at least.
326 is a great number
Your doing amazing. Your almost at a year!! Wow
Yes I know your right. Drinking will make it 10x worse. Maybe try spending time with loved ones?
I was actually talking about my monthly period. It gets horrible for me a few days before and during. I don’t wanna spend time with anyone right now 
I got nothing on that 1 lol
Have a good day today friend
@Amy30 @JazzyS @Just_Laura @Soberbilly
Thanks so much for the support guys i really appreciate it, its a difficult one all round, i think the difficulty is i dont fully trust my ex…i dont fully know what to believe with what hes telling me to be honest as hes lied to me in the past about things, last week he rang me out of the blue at 9am on the Friday morning drunk and crying saying he was in the middle of a forest?! Telling me how he had an arguement with his girlfriend the night before etc…then his phone went out of battery so i worried all day then i found out the police had to go find him and took him home …whatever hes doing hes not stable…ive had to have a talk with him and ive asked for now can he only see our daughter during the day and not over night until he gets a bit better, and he agreed so its just short visits for my daughter for now, weve told her that hes working on a night and that his car is broken (hes lost the keys). I dont want to stop her seeing her dad because she adores him. He has no intention in finding another job and is trying to get benefits for having a mental health condition instead 
the whole thing is just difficult, all the more reason for me to stay sober though and i will…i just feel a bit drained at the moment
@Ballroomdaze Sorry about your ankle. Want to say congrats on your 5 days of sobriety. Recovery will go smoother while sober. Wishing you luck with the surgery.
@happydays Great job on your numbers – congrats on tackling smoking! ODAAT – you can beat this addiction too.
@mischa84 great job on pouring it down the sink. I think I too would have had the second of urge (never waste alcohol was my motto and what a stupid fucking motto that was). Grateful for the reminder that unexpected triggers can occur at any time and we just have to be on guard. You should be super proud of yourself!
@timetochange I hope you are covid negative and start feeling well again soon.
@butterflymoonwoman OOH – I love it – what a great way to keep yourself occupied and awake. Can’t wait to see the finished dream catcher. I do hope you get some time to rest today
That’s right – just take it ODAAT and each day gets a bit easier. Have a wonderful sober weekend my friend. Congrats on your 5 days!
@flourishingperson1 Great job on day 3! Don’t let anyone make you feel odd – you are perfect the way you are. I think its smart to do the sessions on your own. Should have a safe space for yourself while training.
@scorpn Awe love I do hope you get some rest and feel better soon. Hopefully your kids can help in taking care of you when they get home from school.
@starlight14 I’m grateful that you can have an open conversation with your ex. Grateful that you have nixed the over night stays for your daughter – at least till he is able to show some stability. I am sorry that you are going through all of this now but do know we are here if you need to vent. I do hope it will get easier and better for all of you. Just keep doing what you are doing and take it ODAAT! So proud of you and how your are maintaining your sobriety and setting an awesome example for your daughter. Hope you do get some “me” time Kelly to rest and unwind.
Checking in on Friday morning
It’s a glorious day - sun is shining and i feel pretty good. I have PT in a few hours so i’m looking forward to that. Will work on month end accounting stuff later and try to get some fresh air as the weather is my friend today. Hoping everyone has a wonderful addiction free day - sending you all much love
Day 986, TW medicine use craving
Wasted from the week at the treatment centre. The circumstances there, but also my emotions that pop-up and quitting my ptss medication has an effect on my body. Thyroid values are reasonable. Starting medication for my ADHD is postponed till after the weekend. Really found it disappointing, I had them a year ago and worked fine but somehow a psychiatrist pulled me of them because they suppose to make me unstable and push me into my trauma’s. At he put me on risperidon and basically send me home leaving me in owe. In the diagnostic centre they think it was something else. According to them the ADHD was properly diagnosed in a centre at the time. I’m bit craving for them at the moment, my head spins with all the impressions of last weeks. So to be honest I cant’t wait to get the medication to support me to cope with things better.
Greetz
Thanks Jazz, my daughter goes back to school next week so i will get some time then to think things through…i think because ive just had my milestone im feeling a strong urge to do some proper work on myself and my sobriety i just find it difficult to do that when my little one is around so next week im going to make a start…our dear friend @Soberbilly has given me some great recommendations to get me started with learning the buddist approach to recovery which im super excited to get my teeth into. Hope you well Jazz, i appreciate u
Sol 7
2 
1
5
Woooopppp day 100. Feels good to hit that triple digits again. Had a pretty good day yesterday went to all ways to recovery meeting and overdose awareness, it was really nice they had hot dogs and hamburgers and it was just fun. I slept a good portion of this morning which felt nice. Ill probably go hit some weights and possibly go see some of the guys from the half way house, then later do a little reading. Much love everyone
