Day 11…
Decide to " marie kondo " the s$%t out of my house , well because, sober things lol 
being organised and getting sh$%t done instead of being a lazy slob on couch.
And luca is not helping at all. Has made " marie kondo" pile of " does it bring you joy or not " clothes, his napping spot for the arvo lol.
Happy Saturday.
Clean and sober Saturdays are very satisfying 
Struggling
What’s going on Charlie? Talk to us
What’s going on Charlie? We are here for you. I’m glad that you have posted.
We don’t know what’s going on. We don’t know if it’s your sobriety or some personal tragedy or disaster. So I’m going to leave the what’s your plan link here in case it is helpful to you. You know that we have your best interest at heart and are here to support you and I hope that by reading around it is helping you and I’m glad that you came here and posted.
I’m editing to add that I do understand if it is your sobriety that that can be a personal tragedy and a personal disaster and I’m not trying to imply that it isn’t. It was just how my sentence came out.
Oh my gosh, is that Gus? He’s so big!
He’s adorable Eric 
I’m happy to see you got the house you wanted. 
1729
@SadMemeQueen Two years is a huge milestone Megan! Thanks for sharing it. Enormous congrats. Excellent work.
@Charlie_C You’re not alone friend. Hang in there 
@CATMANCAM Yes we do intervision once a month, which is almost the same as supervision. Very helpful, the good part of that morning that I didn’t share about here.
@maxwell Congrats on 60 days Maxine!
@Butterflymoonwoman We’ll be working together Dana 
@Tomek Glad to see good things happening friend. Sorry for the overwhelming feelings. Hugs.
Thank you Maxi.
They grow up so fast when you’re no where near them. Pretty exciting life changes ahead for Pop Pop 
Happy 60 days tomorrow. I think it’s 60.
Been so busy it’s hard to keep up.
Indecisiveness is my greatest weakness. 2nd to procrastination actually, but they tend to go hand in hand. I honestly think that it was worse for me while I was drinking. I’d usually make rash decisions I’d later regret. Eventually it turned to all these thoughts of ‘what ifs’ flying around in my mind and I wouldn’t know what to choose. Now it seems much easier to make the decision by looking at it logically, but then I don’t put it into action. I know what I want for many things, but just keep putting off going thru with it. Is that the same thing? Bc that just made it sound like I can’t make up my mind 
There is one thing I definitely still don’t trust myself with, and that’s relationships. Every one of mine sucked, so when it does come time to decide about someone, it’s gonna be crazy up in here 
Still awake at midnight so im checking in again. My hip is hurting and my brain won’t stop, even after taking my sleeping pill. I have a plan for a new car. Found one i liked online - make, model, color, options, price. Going to the dealership in the morning. My husband said i just need to relax and if im not 100 percent, we can leave. I don’t have to worry about hurting anyone’s feelings. We’ll see what happens.
Im beginning to think that I’ve replaced the obsession with drinking with new obsessions. I spent all my time drinking, planning to drink, hiding my drinking, recovering from drinking - you know the drill. Now i need new things to focus my brain on. I have picked up some new hobbies, but i really don’t have many close friends. I have people i associate with and do activities with, but not besties anymore. I had to end my relationship with my best friend because he was also my number 1 drinking buddy and we were so toxic together. When i tried to get sober after getting my dui, he convinced me to start again - we would moderate. It turned into another 6 years of nonstop chaos and two additional duis for him. This time, i told him i was serious and we hung out twice. The first time he didn’t drink, the second time, he got loaded. We still text occasionally, but don’t hang out.
The weather is supposed to be getting nicer in my area, maybe i can start walking again. No more hiking due to my joint issues, but walking would be good. I also got my motorcycle license after i got sober, but don’t use it much. I usually just ride with my husband because, of couse, i obsess about something bad happening because i don’t have much experience. I don’t trust myself not to do something stupid or others not to run over me.
I really need to get it together, i feel a little crazier than usual lately.
Thanks to anyone who read this wall of rambling text.
This is exactly how i feel. I had no problem making shitty, spur of the moment decsions when i was drinking. Now im capable of rational thought and plan everything out - i love making spreadsheets - but can’t actually execute. My husband still laughs about the patio furniture debacle of summer 2021. It was patio furniture for Christ’s sake and i deliberated over it for months, then went to different stores, back to online, back to stores - color, style, size. It was a whole thing. I finally bought a set and we love it, but he makes fun of me every time we have a get together. Flower planting in the spring is ridiculous. I cried last year because the greenhouse didn’t have the exact zinnias i wanted for a particular spot and choosing a different color sent me over the edge
Yeah, you know? There were so many negative traits brought out by my drinking that have since disappeared, but now it’s like I’m seeing all the negative traits that were there originally, but covered up by drinking. It’s definetly not a straight road when you’re getting to know yourself for the first time.
Checking in day 60! I almost forgot to check in as it’s been a busy day. I wish you all a healthy sober weekend!
380
It’s either too many workers scheduled with not enough to do, or not enough workers doing it all. Tonight was the second one. Idk if my boss will ever get this shit right. It got really stressful for about 45 minutes at one point, but once it was all over, it was worth it. I was starving afterwards so I bought a tv dinner so I didn’t have to cook(i never do that). Buffalo mac n cheese. Super disappointing. All I have to say is that if you’re not from Buffalo, you shouldn’t make Buffalo flavored things, bc you don’t know what you’re doing. I don’t make the rules. Now I’m just trying to wind down bc I’m still wide awake and it’s almost 2! At least I can sleep in, if my body lets me. Keep on keeping on folks 
91 days
Woke up feeling great. Went and got tattooed, went to the beach with the kids later on, now they’re just chilling, watching a movie with their cousins.
Had a brief thought after the tattoo that it’d be a good time to have a beer. Just a habit, get tattooed, drink some beers after. Not anymore.
Good to have another chance to break old habits.
Thanks for the well wishes @Mno @JazzyS @Jimz @CATMANCAM @Cjp
my brother wasn’t trying to get me to drink, just being a host. Gained some good learning from it.
101 sugar
57 UPF
1 overeating/binge
The first day after overeating is mostly easy for me cause I still don’t feel well. The longer it gets the easier it is to forget how it does not help at all and how shitty I feel afterwards, and then the sneaky voice comes in. Today I won’t try to solve anything with food. Today I will not listen to the sneaky voices.
Interesting thought popped up recently. The more I feel like I’m connecting here, the more I feel a need to hide, cause people whom I like might think of me as a looser and a failure and not so great. Gives me a lot to think about.
Today I want to clean up my work place, take care of all IT-systems, enjoy the weather and meet with friends in the evening. Our daughter has still a cold and is running around with a red nose and a sore throat. Nonetheless I’m really looking forward to spring showing up on every corner.
Keep at it everyone. One day at a time. Taking life as it comes. Wishing you peace, kindness and freedom today 
I’m here, I’m alive and I’m sober.
Day 3.
This seems harder everytime I try.
To not drink last night wasn’t as easy as I thought. But I did it. And I’m going to do it again today.
It’s cloudy and rainy outside so today I’m planning to make some order upstairs.
We relocated the boys to downstairs like a month ago when our bedroom renovation finally got finished. Our 14 y/o has serious sleeping problems that comes with his autism, and he feel much safer sharing a bedroom with his brother and sleeping in the room right next to ours.
His brother didn’t mind, so we relocated them.
The plan was to have their bedroom downstairs, a huge play/hobbies room upstairs combined with a guestroom in the spare room.
But for now, the upstairs is just a huge mess with stuff I don’t have a clue where to put.
We’re also renovating the upstairs bathroom at the same time, so it’s an even bigger mess.
I haven’t had the time or the energy to even go up there and fix it. But today is the day.
Wishing y’all a great weekend 
