Day 134. Happy hump day! Wow we had a bad thunderstorm last night with tornadoes in the area. No major injuries reported so thats good.
My business is next to a liquor store. As the storm was going on with emergency warnings going off on my phones and tornado sirens being siunded there were still people driving up to get their alcohol through it. That was me when I was drinking. CRAZY dangerous but had to get my beer. Yes that is the insanity and powerlessness the steps talk about. Glad thats not me now.
Happy day to all! Feeling good this morning. Motivated. Again focusing on reframing and resilience.
Ex calls me here and there as with the children here and there. No consistency. I have expressed so many times the importance of him being in his childrens lives. Family court is on the horizon. Feeling anxious as I know he will have a reaction but will continue taking it one day at a time. Yet I should not have to tell a father this. I continue on doing the best that I can praying for strength. Starts with remaining sober and clean.
1296 days no alcohol.
761 days no cocaine.
276 days no vape.
21 days no binge-eating.
Checking-in with yesterdayās numbersā¦
Had my phone appointment yesterday morning, it wasnāt a doctor like I thought it was going to be, so I couldnāt ask for a referral. It was a triage nurse, she asked me to send a photo so I did, then I received a text a bit later on, to say sheād prescribed some cream to use for one nonth only, and that the condition may fade over some years. Not what I wanted to hear, but Iāll drive to collect the cream later on today hopefully, if it comes in the pharmacyās delivery, and see how it goes.
Therapy was good yesterday. I was able to recognise my progress. She wasnāt happy that one of the guys hasnāt replied to me, or what he said in his initial text to me, so she is going to contact him again. She also thought it was a waste of time when I told her how my meeting with the other guy went. I also showed her my back and she was horrified.
So today Iāve been catching up here. I can call the phaarmacy again after 2pm, for me thatās in 1hr, then Iāll drive to collect the cream, other than that I have a free day. Will hopefully do some reading and go for a walk, along with my usual meditations and catching-up here later on.
Day 742 with hotel room coffee. Today and tomorrow are for visiting relatives. We really only have 3 or 4 houses to visit these days as my Mom is in her 80s and her sisterās husband just died.
Today I will hope the coffee kicks in and that my introvert gets a little rest.
Iām not used to 3 meals a day and its an interesting experiment for my eating tracking.
I gave a tiny glance at the hotel bar at check in and my only thought was āwell, that wonāt helpā.
Sober and driving, not thriving yet today but weāll see if coffee helps.
Checking in 3 days. Working hard to build something new in my marriage. Though my wife is supporting me. She is understandably upset though too and that feeling has lingered in the house. I want to have the best marriage I can. I love my wife and she is everything I could have asked for. Healing will take time and we are both on board. But the bumps in the road are hard when I can tell she is upset and not talking to me etc. Just got to take it one day at a time.
Good Morning it all, I am checking in today. Day 1. Yes there has been many day ones for me. The path forward is a new path and a regardless how many day one I have. My God and I will overcome and I will recover. every day one I get stronger and I learn more variables to the equation. Today Will be a tough day. I enormously tough day. I might have to use the phone sponsor part of the sober app (seeing I dont have one yet). The goal. One day at a time and I. have a feeling there will be some parts of today that will be minute by minute. Starting this day with all prayer and My God for strength for I truly feel powerless as an individual when that time come.
You are in my prayers and my thoughts. having lost a marriage. i will be with you all day in prayer and thought. Time heals wounds and what God has put together let no one break apart.
Hopefully will have caught up with everything by next Tuesday.
Tonight I am going to watch Indiana Jones.
Itās been an OK week. I am just trying to get on track wirh workā¦ Which may sound dullā¦ But it pays the bills.
Hope you have success. Itās definitely work and if you stick around youāll get inspiration from all the very good folks here. Read, engage and ask questions. The wisdom here is astounding.
Day 105. Iām quick with my checks in lately. Unfortunately donāt get to read much, when I get home Iām very tired so I just eat and relax. Yesterday was beautiful out, I could feel the sadness kick in as I just didnāt know what to do on such a beautiful day after work. Nobody to hang out with, didnāt want to go the gym. And yeah idk it was just beautiful and I was going home to sit inside. Today is beautiful again and idk what Iām going to do. Itās a busy day at work, but yeah much love everyone have a lovely Weds
Iām new here, with 5 weeks of white-knuckle sobriety. I reached a sort of crossroads this week. I felt ready to drink yesterday, but didnāt because I knew I didnāt really want to. I was feeling low, ill-at-ease, lonely. I didnāt know what to do about it, yesterday, but I didnāt drink and went to bed early. Up early, and my first thought was: āI need community!ā And I found myself at Talking Sober. I started reading posts and smiled, because there were sober people saying they had no idea how they got here, and even sober people who just left toxic workplaces! Well,well, wellā¦ Iād like to check in and stay, because Iām looking for these people and their peopleā¦a positive, sober community.
Iāve had some very long stretches of sobriety and now am ready to build a shelter again. It definitely feels like Iām at the point where the cement truck is pouring a concrete foundation, but Iām in the cold and wet with no structure. I canāt build alone. Iāve done all I can do, alone.
I have all the necessities to begināI have food, clothes, house, kitty, and five weeks under my belt. Now I need a bit of courage to post, check in for a sober day and future. Courage to stay authentic.
Welcome aboard, @Lighter ! Glad you are here. TS has been a great help to me. So I hope you find it the same! Congrats on five weeks and hereās to many more.
feel better soon š©µ
š©µ
and sending strength to keep fighting š©µ
sending strength 
good to read from you. Sorry youāve been struggling, 
