Thanks! Lots of old feelings came up so I thought it would help to get them out. You keep kicking ass too my friend. 
š«¶š¼
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Love your way with words! Love the idea of young Frankenstein on a drizzly day too.
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Thank you and thank you. Putting the DVD in now and might nap to it.
āHearts and kidneys are tinker toys!ā
I canāt watch this movie with other people around. 
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Checking out on day 113
Tired and long ass day. Gym session, 4 new 125lb rubber mats put in gym for new equipment, gym redesigned for opening space for the 12ā long and 8ā bench outrigger. Itās gonna be big.
Got our lawn all mowed and limed, and tomorrow we head to our first job of season for client of what should be two solid days there for wife and I cleaning out all his garden beds, trimming the bushes, shrubs and trees then mow, edge trim, lime and fertilize. Iām tired already, lol.
Heās looking to hire my wife exclusively two days per week just to work on the gardens, which she is jacked about and she landed a server job at a great local restaurant with her first two shifts doubles on Thurs and Sat.
Seems weāre both going to be going hard this summer and retirement days are done till Oct.
Good night TS fam. Hope you all had a good sober day!
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2y2m14d
Work was hard 
After doing the overnight shift last night and literally pushing myself to go to work, thinking id have care for my son tonight so i can sleep, things changeā¦ when it rains, it pours. Our nurse for tonight calls in sick. So again, i have to stay awake all night and then push myself to go to work tmrw. Im starting to burn out. Including tonight, thats 4 nights in a row that i have to do now. My thinking is slightly disoriented. Its like i cant get the words out that i want to sayā¦ all bcuz im sooo tired. My son has had overnight nurses for 5 years or so and I have NEVER had to experience this lack of nursing. Its unreal. I messaged the scheduler tonight explaining in a polite but semi-firm way that i absolutely need care by May 1st. I hope she takes me seriously. I got my son to bed. Now im going to try and do some self care and relax a bit. Literally i am taking it One day at a time. One night at a time. This too shall pass
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Can your hubby take tonight?
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Good suggestion 
Im going to ask if maybe we can split the shift. He was awake all day watching our son and if he does the full awake overnight shift also and then have to stay awake all day tmrw, im worried he will accidentally fall asleep during the day. But im going to see if he can at least do a few hours overnight so that i can sleep a few hours
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Day 565
Monday I can call the doctors office and request an appointment 
itās been almost 8 months since I had insurance. Hopefully they can help me feel better.
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Checking in absolutely exhausted, but sober and happy. The drive home from the beach wasnāt too bad. Traffic was lighter than usual. Got everything unpacked and put away before going to bed. Got up early this morning and spent the day running our service organizationās game booth at a local festival. It rained a good part of the day and was so cold. There was still a decent crowd and we made some money. I left there and went to help out with the monthly fundraiser we do for a community member in need of financial help. Thankfully, a couple other members filled in and did the cooking, baking and prep work i usually do. I helped in the kitchen for a while, helped clean up, count money, etc. I just got home and Iām so tired, but also too wound up to sleep. I have one more day off before i have to go back to work. Itās supposed to get warmer here tomorrow, so im hoping to go for a motorcycle ride. Hope everyone is having a great weekend.
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@lighter Iām sorry that the insomnia is causing so much havoc. It is hard to operate daily with lack of sleep and I do know how distressing it can get. Especially when the insomnia is so erratic. I do hope you are able to get a good nights sleep tonight and get into a good rhythm. Sending you loads of calming vibes Marie 
@PositiveThoughts see you are hours away from triple digits my friend. That is very impressive work 
Sending healing vibes ā hope that the fever breaks soon. I know its hard to not get āmeā or ādownā time out of the house when you are working all week ā hopefully you can find a good way to unwind at home and practice some self care as a reset for your body and mind
It is easy to get complacent in our recovery when the days start to feel normal but we still have to keep our guards up as the sneaky devil tends to know just when to strike. Great job in staying on track
@tailee17 Hells Yeah!!! 2 months is fantastic work friend Lam Keep going strong my friend.
@seizetheday WOW thatās fantastic. Glad you were able to enjoy a sober holiday. One more milestone to add to your accomplishments
@john_connor1337 DO be gentle with yourself. It is good to have a routine and make sure you are busy so that you canāt focus on your DOC but also to not push yourself when your body needs rest as it is trying to detox and recover from all the damage done by the DOC. Do keep in touch here and with your meetings as support is key. Hold onto the shit feeling and remember it when your mind tries to say its ok to indulge. Sending love and strength Remember that if all you do in a day is stay sober then you have accomplished a LOT cause that in itself takes so much energy and effort.
@hillbillychris You do what feels right for you and your wife. I canāt even imagine the loss that you two have experienced but I can understand you not wanting to belabor the healing process by dragging it out. You need to work on healing and your own recovery. Sending you virtual hugs my friend. Hope you two are able to mend your broken hearts 
@twizzlers Yikes that is a hell of a day. Glad you were able to get it all sorted out and hopefully you are recovering from the side effects now. YEAH Girl ā waking up to 40 days 
@mindofsobermike Lovely to see you checking in Mike. Glad you are spending some quality time with the girls
I donāt know either if anyone wins in these fights but I do know that you wouldnāt be able to live with not having given it everything you got. I am so sorry that you are having to fight so hard in the first place. So sorry that they are making this such a ordeal and your nephew is hanging in the balance. I do hope that you are able to find a resolution to this soon. Sending you hugs and strength my friend.
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@butterflymoonwoman Oh man Iām so sorry to read this Dana. I do hope that hubby can give you a few hours of rest tonight as this is an insane task for anyone. The cycle is unsustainable. I am glad that you reached out to the company and I do hope that they take you seriously. Or hopefully you can report them or go above their heads or??? I donāt know but this is an inhumane way to treat a customer. Hopefully one of the nurses that they were training is up to par by now. Sending you massive virtual hugs my friend. I do hope you are able to get some rest tonight. Thinking of you
@scorpn Grateful that you are able to finally schedule an appointment Renee. Hoping that they are able to get you an appointment quickly. I do hope you are able to get treatment and start feeling better soon
Checking in late on a Saturday night
493 days free of alcohol and weed
908 days free of cigarettes
It was a good day overall. Did get some movement in which is always a plus and my symptoms / pain levels were all manageable. Spent today just working on me and trying PT type exercises myself as my appointment is not till end of June. I am not super tired so will maybe start a movie (that is a sure fire way to fall a sleep LOL).
Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day / evening ā sending you all so much love
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Checking in sober on a Saturday night. 
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1786
While the rest of the country was partying, I did a full commute on my bike yesterday. Funny how you forget how long it is, but already on the way back it felt a bit shorter. Not going to repeat today though, my legs do feel it a bit.
Working Sunday coming up. Thatās fine. Pays extra. Do have some stuff to do outside of work too, but that will have to wait. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Sober and clean. Love from my commute.
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Soccer squad? 
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Firstly, if I was really rich, I would definitely have a footie team: Ted Lasso style, and based in the Riviera.
Secondly, itās football 
even the emoji proves thatā¦
Donāt encourage Joe, @Lighter ā¦ Heās got a fair bit of confusion in his life 
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Iām going to stop doing that. Football is the game played by 2 sides of 11 girls or boys who play a round ball with their feet (unless you are the goalkeeper) or occasionally with their heads and try to put said ball in the opponentsā goal. Itās going to be 15 C today, my commute is 35 km, Iāll drink about a liter of coffee, and consume at least 100 grams of cheese, probably more. Have a great day all, all around the world 
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So thatās where the decent weather is then, the Netherlandsā¦ Itās rained non stop here for at least 24 hours. 
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Thank you Joe, thatās nice of you to say.
I will try to be here more, itās important for my sober me too I guess 
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#Day 2048 
Enjoyed Kingsday yesterday. Visitit a small touristic village nearby where we discovered a big cruiseship filled with tourists from abroad enjoying āourā Kingsday. It was fun seeing them wandering around the little village seeing the village people having fun with the festivaties. A tourist said to me: āI love to see you are all so patriotic!!ā It made me laugh out loud when she was gone (sorry) because we are not. But we Dutch people love to have a party and a day off
Maybe I smash some of youāre ideaās about Dutch people too 
When we walked by that cruise ship we saw the staff all dressed up in old traditional Dutch costumes
But the tourists had fun, that is what counts.Itās funny to see this at the other side. When I am on holiday abroad and I go see a flamingo show for instance, some Spanish girl thinks āthose tourists do strange thingsā
Today? A walk somewhere and no planās made so far.
Have a good day all!!
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