Checking in day 143.
We are on the merry-go-round of house drama. We are now re-visiting extending and renovating our house instead of knocking it down and rebuilding. It would save us so much money and allow us to keep living in the house while we make it larger and more comfortable. Plus as it is a renovation I can do alot of the work, and we can bargain hunt for material.
It is so difficult in Australia to buy or build a house.
Anyway, have a great week guys.
Day 3.
Not even feeling tempted right now. Remembering that the first drink is the easiest to say ānoā to, Iām just being really careful not to have that first drink.
Hope yaāll have a good day!
Hey fam, I havenāt felt truly happy or on track in months since relapsing, and I truly miss that feelingā¦ For once I feel kinda good again thoughā¦ I know Iām still far from who and where I want to be, but I also know I genuinely want to give my best againā¦ What an unpredictable rollercoaster my life has been so far, but Iām ok with that, everything has itās reasons and it can be so hard not to get lost, but as long as I keep trying, learning and growing, weāll find our way one day and way or another 
Hope you have a good sober day or night whoever and wherever you are in the world right now 
I know how you feel. Hang in there, be patient and forgive yourself.
Find your keys to staying strong, and then remember what youāre doing right. 
So glad your husband is home!
Checking in with 123 sober days under my belt. Iāll stay sober today too.
Reflecting on my decent into alcoholism and my progress of recovery today. In 4 years I developed a serious problem with alcohol. The addiction was so strong and the cravings unbearable.
Iām happy to have some distance between me and that vicious cycle.
Thereās a lot to ponder and unravel today. Should make for an interesting day. 
I hope everyone has a good day or night.
126 days sober
I fell during my hike this morning and hurt my arm. Itās sore and swollen since then. It doesnāt feel broken but am a bit concerned about it. Have been resting it today and putting ice on it. Iām feeling stressed.
Otherwise todayās been okay. I ended up staying in and working on the new translation. Making good progress on it so far.
The road out of town is closed for the next 2 days or so. Once its open if my arm is still swollen and feeling bad Iāll go to the capital to have an x-ray done.
Will get some sleep soon. Hope everyone is having a good sober day.
@karenkw Oh iām sorry to hear about your recent bout with the flu and Covid. Sending healing and energy vibes your way. Big hugs love ā hope you are able to talk with your therapist to help you through the depression 
@jules000 Yeah to having some good days ā i loved this post! OOH ā a good alignment can be painful but so worth it ā hope you are feeling better now and past the pain
@scorpn He brought them in and they had babies 
Yeah ā i donāt know about that. No scream but I did jump quickly 
So glad that you did not go in on your day off ā Super proud t see you standing up for yourself! OOH so sweet ā your daughters first date 
So sweet! Wishing you luck with the new job (in getting your schedule) and putting in the application as a good back up 
@danam56 Hope you are able to ice / stretch / heat the back and start feeling better soon Yeah to getting your sofa today
@s_unrelax Great work on 8 days friend. Wishing you luck with working and implementing the program. I know it sucks not having the energy and motivation to do what we want to do ā you will get this back. Give it time. The early days of sobriety take a lot out of us and we need time for our body / mind to regulate itself I see your updated post is 6 hours ago ā hope you were able to stay vigilant and keep away from that 1 beer ā never a good idea to give in ā¦ that 1 leads to destruction.
@1in8billion So very glad to have you back with us and really appreciate your kind words! I am sorry that you have been going through so much ā just know that you are still standing and getting stronger as you find the answers through self-analysis. This process is not easy in any sense. So many think that sobriety just means not partaking in the DOC but its sooo much more. We have to rewire our ways of being ā of thinking ā of feeling. Its crazy that all our learned behavior is no longer useful and we have to start from scratch all the while still living as āadultsā in society. This is where connection is necessary. We have to be reminded in our daily lie that we are not alone. That what we are going through is normal and will pass. That we are strong enough to overcome this addiction. Hope that cold shower helped. I did manage a better nights sleep ā wishing this for the both of us Glad you are starting to feel good again. IT takes time for us to feel like ourselves again. Just know that you are doing your best ā you are giving it your all and you will find your road back to you!
@jesile That damn moderation! Why does our mind trick us into thinking we have it āthis timeā? So glad that you are back on track with a new counter. You have not lost the previous time but are starting with new fresh intentions today! Wishing you a wonderful day 1 and donāt let the disappointment eat at you!
@avior87 Way to go with your double digits ā glad it went quickly for you. Stay vigilant my friend. ODAAT
@mrsodh Oh so glad he is home Sorry to hear about his spinal cyst. The body is so insane with developing cysts and creating so many other problems. I honestly didnāt know how this was even possible until I started to go through it. I am relieved that he is out of the high risk for strokes stage but sorry that he is in so much pain.
@catmancam Thanks Cam ā that was a terrifying experience for sure. I am glad too that they were rescued and hope they are somewhere safe. A friend did change my way of thinking about the situation as I was so mad at the Asshole that would do something like this but my friend said that maybe a kid was setting them free from a fishing tackle box huh ā i do like thinking this rather than the former. So glad you were able to get everything done and your inspection went well Grateful that your back is also better ā hope you have fun with getting your hair cut.
I do love this and I totally understand about having to remind yourself of these things as we do tent to forget. But for today ā this is a great mindset to have ! Glad you were able to get your momās eye checked out ā hope the inflammation subsides soon
I like this for you. Especially with the newborn at homeā¦ wishing you luck with the renovations.
@vanessa8 Thanks love! Appreciate this community and am honored to be here with you all Wow 123 days ā love the sequence. Digging deep can be good but also can wear you out emotionally / mentally. Be prepared for what may unravel. Know you are not alone and remind yourself of your accomplishments. Keep pushing forward
@laner OOH sorry to hear about your fall. I am glad that your arm is not broken but do keep it iced and monitored. The road out is closed? OMG! Well ā hope all is well with your arm and you donāt need to go anywhere. Sending healing vibes your way.
Checking in on Thursday morning
I actually got some good sleep but now feel like I need so much more
Did do my walk and swim this morning. No Crawdads in the pool today LOL. A lady did stop by the pool to say hi and that she was a fellow swimmer. Said that she noticed me swimming daily and wanted to tell me I was a really good swimmer. This comment made my day as I am self taught and super conscious of my swimming style.
I am feeling drained and exhausted so will try to nap ā tried earlier but my mind wouldnāt shut off LOL ā will try again.
Hope you all have a wonderful addiction free day - sending you all so much love
Checking in on day 1
Second check-in of the dayā¦ work has been annoying today, or better said: I was annoyed! Itās 8:00 pm here, so this day is almost over.
Been checking out AA groups in my area, there is a weekly meeting quite close, so I will check that out. I just attended an online zoom meeting, but Iām not sure if thatās gonna be my thing. Weāll see, for the moment I will keep joining. Have a good day everyone!
Day 907
Morning everyone! Just checking in. Have a few things to do this afternoon so im just getting ready for that. Not alot going on otherwise. Have a great day everyone! 
Checking om 952 days. I think I know what Im going to mark my 1000 days with when I reach it. A tattoo.
Day 46 - having a bit of a low day if Iām being totally honest. Some temptation reading itās head, but taking shape in some depression I would say.
I have a dinner with a friend tonight which will be nice, but I am also in a way dressing it because I will be telling him I cannot come to a party I previously committed to because of it being a triggering environment for me.
I donāt know why really but I seem to be forgetting the progress Iāve made and just feel down in the dump 
Great idea! Any thoughts on what ur going to get?
Not sure. I think maybe odaat. Small and discreet 
Checking in, day 31. Today has been a good day. I took a 2.5hrs walk in the nature and ate healthy vegan food. Feeling light and pure. I canāt even realize anymore how many years, decades Iāve been living in a pure ignorant hell. But luckily itās never too late to change. ODAAT.
Day 1328,
Closest to drinking in 1328 days. Going to a meeting saved my ass, f*ck it mode was in reach. Grateful for the fellow who took me for a little walk during the meeting.
Oh, Iām sorry, and I get it! Had a little of that type of feeling this week. Remember itās addiction. Itās not always a big event or problem that starts the thoughts. Sometimes that addictive voice will try to wrap itself in an otherwise pleasant event, like meeting a good friend for a pleasant meal. We usually drank at these types of events, just like non-events. And now there is this sentimental feeling about such a pleasant night with a warm (poisonous 
!!) glow. But if you stop and break down how these nights actually went, it doesnāt match the lie that voice tells us. Not even close.
Did I ever have a good evening with a friend eating dinner and drinking? Yeah, maybe a couple times. Like many years ago. And how did I feel the next day? Like crap. Even on the glowy, very rare types of drinking evenings with where I truly enjoyed myself ā¦. Was it the whole time, or for an hour? Did the evening start out nice but deteriorate once we were drunk? Yes. Did I stay up late and sleep poorly? Yes. Cottonmouth at 3 am? Yes. Did I feel like hot garbage the whole next day, and sometimes multiple days? Yes. Did I actually wish I didnāt the next day? YES. Were there crappy parts of the evening that I canāt see in the romantic version, like my friend vomiting or a very boring story repeated by me or others. Did someone burn themselves cooking or accidentally burn themselves with a cigarette when drunk? Did anyone drive while intoxicated? Straight up- someone could have been killed, badly injured or gone to jail. After four or five drinks. On a pleasant night. Alcohol does not care if you had a nice dinner. Someone usually drives on these nights. Stuff like that.
We leave all that out when the dream takes over. The lie. The sometimes pretty and always monstrous lie. That it has something to add. It never does. What makes the evening wonderful is you and your friend together, enjoying a meal. Not the alcohol, it only subtracts. I need to be honest when I start thinking about the new friends Iāve made in sobriety that are ānormiesā. Iāve already had that dreamy feeling that we could have a little wine in the backyard while grilling. What? Is that true it would be like that? NO!!! I donāt have āa littleā wine. Never have. Lies. Gonna check myself every time I romanticize drinking! Be honest about what really happens when you drink and it helps. Weāre not here for no reason.
I will meet these people sober and have a good time. Iām so much sharper and will not make an ass of myself. And can get in my car and go anytime. This life is better. Sending you hugs and support 
Thank you for this great post.
Day 16. Today I am Exhausted 
. Itās the heat
@MrMoustache Yup, the ignorance. But no use wasting more time kicking ourselves, itās past and weāve got this great new life. Best place to spend mental energy. Good to remind ourselves why we donāt want to go back there, then enjoy. Big hugs, youāre doing so well and it makes me smile