Hi all! Another day, another gift, another opportunity… 
I promise myself to give my best to grow today.
Try to visualise your ideal self and life for a moment… Your dream machine… And no fantasy nonsense or societal expectation, but the kind of you that would put a big smile on your face on any day. What might it realistically take to get there? What could you possibly achieve if you gave your absolute best for the rest of the day? Your hypothetical max potential? What could you achieve after 1 week of that? 1 month? 1 year? Now imagine what a truly committed you is capable of achieving after 5 years of pursuing your absolute best…
Thoughts, time, existence, nothing is what we think it is. And they are always changing, growing and evolving! The brain is a complex computer, taking in and interpreting information. Ever heard of the saying “you are what you eat”? Well lo and behold, the thoughts and activities that we consume create our realities before us. Every cell in our body is replaced every 7 years… And thoughts are mere neural connections or ‘pathways’ in the brain that we already create, use, change or disuse to irrelevance 24/7. We’re like developing characters in a story, movie or game. And we 100% have control over how our mind and body evolves from here on through exposure and repetition! Use it or lose it…
We can literally rewire our brain’s thoughts and habits like roads might expand into highways, be redirected or disused into overgrowth, because brains are just as shapeable as bodies are! Now remember when I asked you to visualise your ideal self…
What were we born for? What were you born for? Comfort or success? A caterpillar needs to leave it’s cocoon to realize it’s full potential as a butterfly… A seedling needs to work hard and open up to realize it’s full potential as a flower or tree… And so too is our comfort zone meant to be challenged and pushed to it’s limit to realize our insane potential! If only we knew… And deep down we do, or we wouldn’t be here. Life is really about focussing on what’s best not easiest - those of us who understand that will find a way, because willpower moves mountains. And an ideal self would know that success is as simple as taking one small but intentional step at a time, one day at a time, just getting back up if you fall (or picking that bicycle back up), and focussing on the journey rather than the destination, because you won’t progress without patience and the readiness to embrace discomfort as readily as you would comfort! Guess what, the more you embrace and continue to expose yourself to discomfort - the more you become comfortable with discomfort! No pain no gain.
It might sound easier said than done… But I know from personal experience that time changes everything. Trigger warning if you don’t want or need to hear this… When I was a child into my mid to late teens, I developed a trauma-induced ‘food problem’ as I used to call it, where an intense anxiety made me vomit at the mere sight, smell, mention or thought of food, an expression of ptsd caused by my psychopath father. During this hopeless period in my life, I lived more compulsively and in a subconscious survival mode than anything, and could never have imagined a future free of what felt like such an entrenched part of me… In fact, my numb, stressed self rarely even thought that far if I’m honest. But whether it was time, effort, luck or a combination, I did… I could never have imagined an independent self so mature and conscious and free - and yet here I am… Other examples include past ticks or breakups for example (my insecurity making breakups particularly hard to swallow), but I know they didn’t last forever either, no matter how hard it felt to believe at the time. With enough distance, provided better alternatives, change and growth are inevitable! We can overcome anything and become anyone given only time and effort.
I look back at the different stages in my life and can hardly relate to most, because I’ve changed so much along the way! Proof before our blind eyes that we are not stuck! Fck addictions. Fck selling such a crazy, mysterious and infinitely lucky gift that is our chance to exist, live and be conscious for just one short flicker of a moment right here and now! If we let go of all our constructs, fears, expectations etc and zoom out to grasp the bigger picture for just one moment… The chances, opportunity and potential! We’re conscious beings, with bodies and limbs at our command, senses to take in wherever we are, whatever it is… Have a glimpse of what love and laughter and dreams and so much to live for are? So much! And an attachment to something SO stupid is meant to throw all that away…?! It sounds insane because it is. Our addictions and attachment to comfort in old habits are NOT ‘fine’ - they NEED to be changed as much as we deserve, are worthy of and MEANT to give and be our best! One day will be too late, and we ‘could have’ had it all with one small change one unsuspecting day… Only the courage to face and embrace our pain, fears and discomfort can and will set us free!
One thought, action, moment, step and day at a time…
Hope you learned or gained something from my little self-analysing pep-talk if you read this far 
and have as good a day or night as you can friend 
Cravings happen alot the first few months. I ate like a maniac(mostly bc I finally could) and was still losing weight. I drank upwards of 2,000 horribly empty calories every day for years, so I figured calories from junk food had to be better than those from alcohol 
Sounds right, right? 
That was the perfect decision to make in that moment 
Good job! Glad you’ve added something new to your recovery.
I tried to nap before work, but yet again, just layed there. Work was chaotic bc my boss didn’t take any advice about how the night should go and continously made dumb decisions that complicated everything. Sometimes I wish I could see her do our job the same way she asks it of us. I think it’d open her eyes to the level of crazy it’s causing. Ah well, having to move so fast kept my energy up until the end of the shift, then I crashed. Feeling pretty tired, but a little hungry, so I’m going to test my snack before bed idea. We’ll see 
Hope you all enjoy a sober Saturday 
ODAAT
The spin offs have gotten more seasons and nothing here, whats up with that !?