Checking in daily to maintain focus #68

[tailee17]

That situation is just “poopy”. I feel your frustration. Sending you positive vibes!

[Juli1]

195

I just need to ad that I am still sober.
Had a hard time with food topic again.
Wise friend painted image of a tree, that grows in selfhate or self-love, depending on what we feed it. Still finding my way out. Now. I am OK. But a big fat cloud is following me. Now. I am OK.

[tailee17]

[MrMoustache]

[Dustysprungfield]

I’m good. Monday night, bed early and set up for the week.
I sometimes make promises to myself like we all have and have often broken them… Like we all have. But I have this silver bullet type promise that I really only bring out on rare occasions and it’s called a pact. I’m not really sure where it came from but it’s like a super duper promise that I just can’t break. I made one yesterday that I will not slip until July next year.
Now before you roll in, I know what you’re going to say, I know total abstinence is our end goal here and my 12 month “pact” deal may not be in the ethos of this group but you are not me and I’m not you. I hope 12 months will be the first year of sobriety for me and I will reevaluate my situation as I become stronger but this is where I am at.

I’ve thought about not sharing this here for fear of triggering someone or appearing not to be true to sobriety, but again. You are not me & I am not you.

I have set some major milestones in place that should take me to places I’ve not been before. I’m going to see things and experience things on another level.
Goodnight

[tailee17]

@Dustysprungfield

I’ve thought about not sharing this here for fear of triggering someone or appearing not to be true to sobriety, but again. You are not me & I am not you.

After reading your post several comments came to mind… In AA “to be a member one only needs to have the desire to stop drinking”. My understanding of Talking Sober (others please correct me if I am wrong) is a platform for those wanting a support group to achieve a life from addiction whatever addiction that might be. Your plan or process to achieve your goal is Yours and Yours alone. I see no judgements here in my 1+ years as a TS participant. If you are sober today and that is what you want, Congratulations. I am glad you are here and hope you find contentment and happiness. Personally I have found so much more reading and posting here than just the achievement of sobriety. Have a great day.

[Bomdhil]

@JazzyS thank you dear friend! I love finishing books ! Congratulations!!
Day 20. I feel weak. Always when I am close to a great milestone like 30 I tremble

[Bomdhil]

@Juli1 congratulations . I hope you can escape from that cloud

[Timetochange]

Day 415. Second check in. Starting the registration process for my course and planning the dates.i hope I’ve made the right decision to focus on that rather than promotion. I use to feel confident in my decision making but over the past few years, less so.

Off to London. Alcohol free

[Wakikki]

956 days af

[Scorpn]

Day 672.75
Another day done. I woke up feeling a little better. Not 100% but able to walk easier.
I am however getting a cold from one of the kids.

I have been trying to straighten things up at home. So they’re in better condition since I have extra days off of work. But I can only do so much and I am frustrated with myself with some of the things I can’t do…

Oh well things will get better. I am sober. I am self harm free. I have been trying to eat so I can take ibuprofen without upsetting my stomach

[Anjee]

Good for you, Dana! How was your first AA meeting?

[JazzyS]

@Jesile sounds like a very productive day love…
Hope you were able to rest and relax.
@Juli1 oh I love the metaphor of a tree …keep nourishing yourself my friend. 195 days!!
@Dustysprungfield 1 year promise is great. You will be sober for today, you will be sober for tomorrow…we just take it ODAAT. Glad you are here with us fighting for your sobriety for today
@Bomdhil thanks friend and yeah to 20 days!!! You just focus on today. I see you getting 30 days and beyond!
@scorpn glad your back is feeling better. You have a lot going on and always juggling so much. Please be kinder to yourself. I know it’s a normal response to feel frustrated with ourselves when we aren’t doing the things on our list but remember that the list never ends and you are doing the absolute best you can. Please be kind to yourself

[Mira_D]

Checking in, just about off to bed. Had some physical anxiety today but maybe too much coffee and a lot on the mind. Issues with my dad and that family, swirling in my head.

I cannot help but feeling, am I in the wrong? Do I behave ungrateful? Money is a horrid thing, and I have had to navigate my life with him as its something he/they have and value grately. I revolted against it whdn I was young, and have grown into my own principles but also came to understand how my dad shows love is through material things. I dont believe I have been ungrateful for what he has given me or how it has made mg life easier in some ways, but material things doesnt buy the right to behaving in any way you choose. Part of me has grappled for years with wantinf to cut ties to any material gifts from him as it feels like a trap I cannot get free of - being painted as ungrateful and entitled, is how I now understand I have been characterized by my family. The swirl in my head is exhausting.

Going to keep praying on this because frankly i am at a loss.

Xo.

[Just_Laura]

@MooseTracks Happy birthday! Hope you had a nice day

544

Oddly, I rarely drank on my actual birthday. It was one of the many rules I made for myself(and eventually broke). My reasons were to remember everything and not ruin it in any way. Those birthdays always turned out great! That should’ve told me something

This morning I woke up naturally after 8 hours of sleep and felt pretty good. Not as exhausted as yesterday but still sore. I stretch my calves more than anything bc of how much I walk, but damn are they tight! Trying to foam roll them is insanely painful

We didn’t end up getting outside today, other than errands, bc it rained for most of it. Still a beautiful day, just wet. This is why I don’t look ahead on the weather, it’s never right. Either my plans don’t happen bc of rain, or I don’t plan at all bc of ‘rain’ and it ends up sunny!(somehow worse) Come to western NY and be a meteorologist! A job where you’re almost always wrong and still get paid Anyway, a pleasant day off nonetheless Have a great 24 everyone!

[Butterflymoonwoman]

Evening check in
Day 911
Was an alright day. Had some moments of feeling overstimulated, but managed to bring myself back using prayer and deep breathing. This is progress for me bcuz in the past I would let that feeling grow until i was extremely irritable and not plesant to be around. I didnt want to end up like that today so decided to reach out to my HP for guidance and patience. It helped! I was able to compose myself and put my best foot forward for the rest of the evening AND most importantly, not take out my frustrations on others. Hope everyone has a good evening

[Mno]

1893

Hot and humid day and night. I didn’t make it to Dharma Recovery meeting last night. Too hot and after eating some I got rather unwell. It’s a wonder I slept, dreaming some very vivid complicated dreams. Work has the climate control working pretty well so it isn’t the worst place to be on days like this. And it’s supposed to cool of a bit later. Hope so as this city isn’t build for it and neither am I.

So off I go again, on my road of discovery for another day. Together with you all. I could never do this alone. Forever grateful and forever in my heart. All of you. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Make it sober and clean or nothing will come of it. Love.

[DanaM56]

@Anjee it felt good. I attended another meeting on Sunday and met a group of very welcoming women. I plan on attending one meeting tomorrow with a couple of them.