Thank you @CATMANCAM , I hope so too 
Yes nature has a lot of beautiful flowers to find, I love everyone of them. I like to search for their names in the hope I can remember them next time.
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Thanks Cam and Amie for your kind words! Good to be back again! Shame kept me holding backā¦ silly me! 
@Twizzlers
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Checking in day 129. Little man was feeling better today but got to stay with his Nanna all day and over night which I know he would love. Heās asked her to go to the beach to see the crabs and the sharks tomorrow lol not sure how theyāll go. If they canāt see sealife Iāll take him to the aquarium or zoo on the weekend.
Iām really happy that since quitting alcohol, my anxiety doesnāt rage for days or weeks when something happens. I can process my thoughts and emotions so much better and work out a solutions and move forward much faster (even if that solution is simply letting go).
Have a great end of week everyone!
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Day 146
Enjoying a quiet morning. Block party was overwhelming- it was more of a regional party and my head is spinning. So strange this āreintegrationā stuff!
Without alcohol, you actually notice everything and that makes it overwhelming I think. Iām processing.
Been in an introverted kind of state since I got sober. But Iām not that introverted, so it will get way better. Ambiverts unite!! 
. Forever trying to strike that balance between social and not. Parasocial. Quasi-social. Why were there SO many people there? How could I have 5000 neighbors? Where did they come from? I need a moment.
At no point did I want to drink. The people I kinda hung out with the most unfortunately smelled of bourbon. It smelled a lot. I never noticed that, in the pastā the smell. I just kept talking. They live across the street and throw constant barbecues. Nice people but yikes. Hard partyers. No problem though. Iām going to be nice to all of the neighbors, all of them, then sort it out as far as who I want to spend time with. No running across the street to the people who were the friendliest to me. This takes some effort. Back in the day it was stumbling from party to party. Whoever was drinking the most was my friend. So of course the drinkers keyed in on me. I really havenāt been sober long.
Now Iāll be polite and a good neighbor and maybe go to 1 or 2 party neighbor cookouts a year. And fill up with sober activities. Iām going to have to mix with all sorts to start. But with you on my side, I can do this! 5 months coming 
. Socializing is a fucking minefield initially but Iāve got you!! 
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Just checking in on day 13 into my second year of freedom. Strength and love to all! 
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Day 1314,
Did a nice hike today, a lot of thoughts. Maybe overthinking, trauma respons. Called my sponsor during the walk, figuring whether my date crossed my boundaries, at least she is challenging them. Nasty dream in the morning including ex girlfriends 
Practice, practice, practice. Serenity prayer on repeat. So happy with such a party head 
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Checking in be4 dental work 2 hours and a good numbed mouth on day
441 no alcohol
372 no vapes or ciggs 81 no form of nicotine
41 no form of marijuanna
Make sure ya brush ya teeth 
Annnnnnd
I found my bible lastnight
I like reading just a random passage a day
Lastnight it was about not fretting over evil and not admiring it because they will wither away like the grassā¦it might not be exact words but it was good to think about.
My wife in no way religious. She actually hates it and thinks its mans word and a set up so.when i told her i read she shrugged it off but i used the passage and empathy to get passed it. I didnt want to be the evil.so i kissed her and said i love her
Thats why i read the passages
I put them to work in the day
Im not too religious but reading the bible passages really uplift me
Thats all for now
Take care
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7y7m11d
Iām just getting past a big mental work ordeal of my own making. I can get so into my head over work fears and this one took days to get over. I catastrophise about losing my job and how will I afford to live? At my age I donāt have the security of knowing I can find another job. These insecurities used to be times that I drank to settle my fears and feel ānormalā instantly. I can think thoughts like, āthe other engineer is so good and Iām just not up to par.ā Itās all nonsense. Iām having to be humble right now on some work that my boss is having my subordinate lead so that heās essentially my boss on these big tasks.
Anyway, on other stuff, my son is coming home from 2 weeks at camp tomorrow. It will be good to have him home again. Then next week he is getting braces. I might take him for a haircut since his hair hasnāt been cut for a year and is l-o-n-g. Iām undecided since I know heāll resist.
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- Sober and staying sober
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112 days sober
I had a flashback this morning after another night of bad dreams. Iāve been anxious since then and felt antisocial. But I made myself exercise, eat heathy even though I really was craving eating snack food today which isnāt very like me and still worked. In the evening my closest friend came to check in on me because I told her I was having a bad day. I asked if she would stay the night to keep me company and Iām glad I asked.
Honestly Iām surprised I didnāt crave drinking much today but Iām glad I didnāt. Guess food craving is better than drink craving? Hoping to sleep well tonight and feel more myself tomorrow. I canāt let a bad day get me down or set me back.
Anyways hope everyone else is having a good sober day.
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Found out i have paradontal disease (bone loss underneath the gums) and gingavitus (flayering gums)
Both can be saved but paridontal camt be reveresed
I need to brush and floss everyday and see my dentist at regular.cleanings
THEY SAID I COULD LOSE MY TEETH AT MY PAST PACE
so they are now saved but i have to brush floss and see them at regular visists
Gibgavitus can go away
Paridontal disease is bone loss so i have that for life but it can be saved from progession
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Iām here, Iām alive Iām sober and Iām happy.
Day 148
Happy Christmas in July.
Kids woke up to a few gifts this morning, Including a Santa Check, that they could change for money.
They did, and wanted to go into town and buy a few things theyāve wished for.
14 y/o has wanted a calligraphy set for months. Unfortunately we couldnāt find any, so weāre going to order online instead. So today he finally decided on buying a coloring book with Japanese art and some pencils.
12 y/o bought a diamond painting set with a dreamcatcher. And a necklace with Jos zodiac sign.
When we had lunch we met a man that really looked like Santa Claus, red T-shirt, surfers shorts, long white beard and long white hair.
The boys where amazed, but still try to talk quiet about that Santa was actually having lunch at the same place as them, on Christmas in July.
He eventually overherad them kept up the Santa Claus alias and told the boys that he was camping nearby (Thereās a pretty popular camping spot in the city nearby one of the biggest lakes in Sweden)
They have been talking about Santa Claus all day now.
Thatās all Folks 
Wishing yāall a wonderful day.
Pictures from our Christmas in July morning.
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177 days sober
Learning each day
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Day 1013 AF
Sup, gang.
It has been a busy week. Celebrated my wifeās bday Monday. Took her to breakfast with the fam and then had a bday cake.
Went to visit my niece and nephew last night. Theyāre moving out of state tomorrow. We got rear-ended by a car on our drive up there. The driver drove off. It wasnāt anything major. Everyoneās good. Kids and the wife were startled. Some small scrapes on the bumper.
Nothing much going on today. I decided to try a Sierra Nevada Hop Splash AF. Taste just like a beer. Not sure how I feel about them. Little triggering to be honest. Donāt wanna fuck around and learn the hard way.
Iāll catch up with yāall later. I hope everyoneās doing well.
Take care. ODAAT
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Checking in day 2
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3 days. Checking in.
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Checking in day 206 AF
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146 part 2
I am so hungry. There isnāt anything good to eat. Just found out the food trucks are coming to an outdoor event at the park nearby. Sounds like another perfect social event for early sobriety. Music, food and new people. Starts at 5 so I can run if needed. Yeah. I am so ready to meet more people. I think the lobster truck is coming. Itās Texas so tacos and barbecueā¦but maybe the āexoticā Will show up . Iām so happy to be entering a new phase where I donāt have to be such a China doll. BUT, ten cuidado por cierto! Eat early and often.
Love yāall
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Checking in with 109 days sober. I will stay sober today too.
Went out to dinner last night and my husband had a couple of margaritas. I didnāt want one at all.
Then, during dinner we got some bad news about our kidsā school. In the past I would have drank to cope. But not last night. Not a single part of me wanted alcohol. Now today, feeling clear headed, Iām tackling the problem.
ODAAT
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