Thank you Anne!
Sometimes I still feel all the trouble of last 6 months. Although I am fine now. Got a new job starting 01.09. and the pleasure to have some more summer free time until then 
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184 days AF
Got my niece for overnight until weekend. Yesterday we were at the pool and spent 2,5 hours constantly in water 
Had my small and large fins with me and as she already got my size she had a lot of fun with it, diving around on the bottom of the pool. We will be back there today. I would love to make her a fan 
Not using YouTube with chaotic shorts is shifting my interest to more silent and useful things. Or just enjoying void
Love you guys 
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It’s awesome Anne. I was thinking about using Google to find it but now you did it for me, thank you! I like art like that. It has to tease and stimulate your mind a bit 
And thank you for being here too, together we make this forum do what it has to do 
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I’m present, I can function today, I can deal with problems, issues & tasks as they arise. I think a lot of.us will know the feeling of helplessness when we’re down and out. Thankfully I’m not there today.
Life is so much easier without the drug of choice. There is such a short window of pleasure when we indulge or slip up but the fallout is never worth it.
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*Day 2143 
Busy day ahead, but looking forward to it.
Having a crossfitclass at 9 and biking home for a quick shower. Biking to the train station picking up @Mno and go for a lunch in my home town finished by a guided tour trough town. Live here for more then 40 years and have never done this kind of tours. Curious if I learn something new about my city 
Picture of little “Forget me not” (Vergeet mij nietje) I saw during one of my walks.
Have a good day ore night all
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1881
Power’s off as work has to be done on the grid outside my place. Forgot about that. Hoping it won’t last as long as to thaw all the stuff in my freezer. Also can’t make Luna her morning smoothie. Sorry baby. Can’t shower. Sorry Claudia @SoberWalker. See you in a couple of hours. Looking forward to that. Also looking forward to my nephew rowing his semifinal this morning. I’ll have to watch it on my phone.
Have as good a day as you can all. Make it sober and clean or nothing will come from it. I will. Love.
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You can shower in the rain? 
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It’s dry here
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Day 1019 AF
Sup, fam.
Nothing new over here. Staying busy with work and the kiddos.
Going back to my evening walks. Feels good getting out of the apartment. I’ve been taking my lil man to the park but he’s been throwin his tantrums. Doesn’t wanna leave and starts crying. 
Anyway, still doing the sober thangs. You know how it is, gang. ODAAT.
Congrats to those hittin milestones. Congrats on 24 hrs sober! LFG!
Luv y’all
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@Tragicfarinelli they really are bizarre! 
hopefully that salt water is uninfectious 
I love swimming in the sea 
@Twizzlers I love that you get so much wildlife in your garden, it sounds lovely out there, I’m so happy you’re enjoying it 🩵
@Butterflymoonwoman thank you but ugh! I’m so sorry this is happening …AGAIN! Could you afford to cancel one or both of your weekend shifts this weekend so you can get some sleep?
@Jesile thank you I hope yours continues to be under control, that’s amazing 🩵
@Alena I’m sorry things are rough 
sending strength 🩵 I do hope your health issues can be healed congrats on double digits 
@JazzyS thank you 🩵 I’m glad your car is an easy fix 
@Scorpn that’s revolting 
I’m glad you are taking action to resolve it, but I’m sorry your colleagues don’t have the same approach 
@SoberWalker @Mno enjoy your lunch and tour together you really do find the prettiest flowers 
1451 days no alcohol.
916 days no cocaine.
431 days no vape.
4 days no crisps, no binge-eating.
Nothing much to update, I fell asleep at 18:30 last night, less than 4hrs after I last checked-in. I did my meditations and took the rubbish and recycling out to the bins. I slept well for a change, and I’m feeling good.
Today I’d like to get back on track with doing my morning routine. I will do my meditations and read a chapter of the book I’m reading, and hopefully move things around in the spare room to make room for the shelving unit I need to build.
🩵
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I’m here, I’m alive I’m sober and I’m happy.
Day 155.
Don’t have much to say about yesterday. The only nice people was my 2 y/o nephew and my brother in law.
I really need to move so I don’t have my Ma constantly complaining about everything, and will get the possibility to minimize contact with her. She’s going to drive me insane if I don’t.
On the positive note she did think that I should start the gardener program. That’s pretty much the first time she’s positive in something that I actually do,or plan to do.
Strange.
August 1st today. 3 weeks until school starts for the kids. I wish summer holiday could last forever.
Well at least it looks like we’ll have a wonderful warm an sunny day today. That’s great.
That’s all Folks, wishing y’all a wonderful day 
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398
I have a cousin who is my close friend as well, he is an addict (alco) and chronic relapser, I posted few times about him when I was concerned cause he disappeared for a week or left rehab. Well, he is doing good now and I’m very proud of him. He has a sister. She has some problem too but less with alco, her doc is any white powder she can sniff thru her nose. She got into big troubles lately, some very bad company of dealers and thief’s, she got beaten up, totalled a car (which was not even her) and more and for sure much more that I have no idea about. I’m very close with her mother (sister of my mother who died 17 years ago). My cousin doesn’t want to go to rehab or therapy, she still thinks she doesn’t have a problem and she is chronic liar, always was. It’s difficult cause we never know if she’s lying or telling.the truth, she lied to all of us so many times, since always, we kind of got used to it. Well, since few days she is with us. For 2 weeks, maybe more. Here she can rest, she can’t buy drugs (she doesn’t know anybody here and anyway, doesn’t know the language). She is sleeping almost all the time, its so sad. Waking up, eating, going back to sleep or falling asleep on the sofa. I think maybe she is taking some diazepam or something but she said she doesn’t (although, it might be a lie). My kids love her and that short times she is awake they have a fun together. Yesterday I went for a run, she said.she will look after the kids, she is fine. When i came back after 40min she was sleeping in the living room and it was totally quiet. I got scared that boys left the house. Luckily they were upstairs. Also I couldn’t wake her up and when finally I did, she said she has everything under control and she hears boys all the time. Yeah, bullshit. I’m not angry, it’s not that I want to use her as a babysitter now, but would be nice to know if I can count on her sometimes or not. Okay, enough of rambling.
I also gained 2kg which is annoying.
Oh, I want to stop taking antidepressants (I’m on fluoxetine). Already 5 days on half dosage, in about 3 weeks i will stop completely. I’m doing this mostly because after pills my libido is very low or non existent and I am done with forcing myself to be close with my husband and doing it without any feelings, just like another duty. Its not fair to me and its not.fair to him. I want my normal self back 
Sorry for tmi.
I wasn’t posting here much lately, quite busy here. But I’m lurking, I’m here every day.
Love you all 
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Day 404. Working 8-4 today. Full of meetings but all OK. Then a long weekend.
Visitor has left. It went well. I feel committed to being alcohol free so if on occasion I have to fake myself off to bed or out of a situation there is no shame in that. It’s just looking out for myself. Have a fab day folks
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@Timetochange 
to your commitment to sobriety!
@Mischa84 The situation with your visitor is a tough one. It’s basically an adult who behaves like a child, and actually needs all the care of one. I honestly never know how to deal with these kinds of situations. And you already have three kids at home Anyways: Sending you strength and patience and lots of self-care. Really don’t forget to look after yourself. We tend to forget that 
@MrsOdh When is your gardening program going to start? Is it going to be some kind of school?
@CATMANCAM It’s so nice to see you on the up side of sunshine 
@Mno Last week I saw some crazy people in Utrecht swimming in the canal. Maybe that’s your cue for the no-shower situation 
The freezer though is more of a problem in this season. I hope they’ll be done with the works 
@SoberWalker Hoping to see some pictures from your walk. Enjoy it!
@Dustysprungfield Thank you for your share 
This is really helping me today. I am troubled by anxiety and worries. But you reminded me that if
@Juli1 Kids in pool are the most fun. My daughter has three sets of fins and loves to dive. Have so much fun! 
@Scorpn This sounds like a really f$*%ed up day 
I really am sorry you got so much 
pile on you today. But I’m glad you came here and vented, and am hoping you get some downtime and time for self care soon. Sending hugs
@zzz Four weeks!!! Great job my truckin friend 
253 sugar
117 UPF
124 gluten
23 dairy
6 overeating
My hormone induced anxiety and stress are back. I’m torn between distracting myself and trying to stay mindful. I know this will pass. I just hope it won’t affect my trip tomorrow too much.
Apart from that I sent my daughter off with my family for their Poland vacation camp this morning. I’m going to pack my own stuff today, load up on media, and do last prep for my trip tomorrow.
I also have a much needed appointment to ge my hair cut in the afternoon. Some yoga and Recovery Dharma in the evening should finish up my day.
Let’s go for peace, kindness and freedom today friends 
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243 days
Gym in the morning. Then just a quiet day at home before the kids sport in the afternoon.
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It’s a program at the university, you’ll get a Bachelor’s degree in gardening and landscaping, aimed at cultural and heirloom greenery.
If I register it’ll start at September 9. First semester mostly theoretical from. Second semester that start’s in January, you’ll share full responsibility of the university garden together with other students. And the possibilities to go abroad for internship programs.
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this forum has been a lifesaver at times. Happy sober Thursday xx
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Wow! That does sound great if you are into the idea of gardening and landscaping. Especially the part about cultural and heirloom greenery would interest me personally.
But you have not decided yet?
@Seizetheday Congrats on 7 months. This is awesome!!! 
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Congratulations on 7 months. I agree this forum is a valuable tool to remain sober!
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