Day 2327. I have been letting a custome from where I work live rent free in my head. I have worked with the public for decades, and for some reason I cannot shake him out of my head.
This to will pass. Just annoying
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Thank you! 
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@Laner congrats on 4 months 
Iām glad therapy went well today š©µ and itās so awesome you are starting this new project, Iām excited for you 
@JazzyS thank you I hope you slept well last night 
š©µ
@Jeanine congrats Grandma-to-be 
@Just_Laura thank you! Iām glad the big day went well 
I hope your shoulders are not too sore š©µ
@Mno I hope your back heals quickly š©µ
@acromouse Iām loving your vacation updates, today sounds particularly pleasant with the walk in the river congrats on double digits for no overeating
@MrsOdh sending well wishes for your husband 
@Sunny11 welcome back congrats on day 3
@MooseTracks sorry for your loss 
but congrats on accepting an offer on the house 
and for 700 days / 23 months sober
@Thirdmonkey that does sound annoying 
wishing you peace from it 
1455 days no alcohol.
920 days no cocaine.
435 days no vape.
8 days no crisps, no binge-eating.
Yesterday I was still fatigued from not getting any sleep on Friday night, despite sleeping reasonably well Saturday night, I just couldnāt get going. I did take 4 big strong boxes to store in the garage, and broke down the rest of the boxes and took them to the recycling bins. The spare room looks more organised now. I also caught up here, did my meditations, and read a chapter of the book Iām reading.
This morning I showered and made it to my appointment on time. I saw the Physio, heās referring me to their specialist as my back has got worse instead of better after being with them for a year now.
Then I had Monday Therapy, she says I seem more comfortable and open and that Iām finding healthier ways of coping. Itās hard to see that for myself.
Iām home now, Iām fatigued and my back is hurting, Iāve done 8287 steps today, 5.8km, but I need to atleast make a start on some of my cleaning jobs, ahead of the inspection on Thursday, still lots to do.
š©µ
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Reading about your progress made my day Laner. Thanks so much for sharing. So glad you and your counsellor seem to be getting on well, and that you get to work on the trauma workbook together. As well as the other new stuff you are doing. Yay!
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Donāt overdo it friend. You need your back. Glad to read your therapist sees progress. Now for yourself to see it too 
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@CATMANCAM @Mno thanks for the encouragement you always give! Being part of this community has really helped me in my sobriety. And am so grateful that my friend helped me be able to get this counselor. I can really see that Iām changing this time around and starting to heal.
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Day 157
I think Iām nearly done molting now 
. Something is very different the past few days. Iām sleeping deeply, not waking up in a heavy cold sweat/panic, no weird food cravings, very little anxiety ā itās so good!
Enjoying this dreamy feeling as I need to get back to all the things this week. I took a lot of time away for once in my life. Just stepped off the damned wheel. I was able to so I did. Now Iām ready to come back, but not ever to that torture. Coming back as me. Facing a strange, almost non-existent culture that doesnāt really accept me. But there are always people who will, you just have to look around and stay open. Iāll find people since Iām not moving yet.
I was scared it was how it was going to be forever. Now I see Iām really recovering and it only gets better.
Enjoy your day. Iām really hungry and need to get in the kitchen stat.
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I felt the same way. When the struggle was so real and the world around me seemed not at all helping me out no matter how hard I was working at it. Iām at 160 days today and the world has opened up to endless possibilities. Thanks for being here for me and with me.
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Third check in.
Husband update.
It wasnāt a blod clot in his arm, it was a blod clot in his brain.
A small one called a TIA.
He is going to stay at the hospital at least this week, because they said thereās a big risk for a stroke. A TIA attack is like a mini stroke, and apparently they can so things at the hospital to prevent a real stroke from happening if I got it right.
For those of you who remember last year, he was at the hospital during this time of the year too, but for appendicitis, that turned into fluid in his lungās and pneumonia.
Same hospital.
My 14 y/o now has a theory that his Pa was a Russian noble guy in a past life, they usually donāt do well in August 
Me? Well, thereās a saying among those who believes in God, that God never give you more than you can handle. I strongly doubt that because Iām at the Edge here.
I donāt wonāt to drink, cause that wonāt help.
Just donāt know what do to other than wait.
Itās ironic, for 10 years Iāve been patiently waiting for my husband to get home from work (he used to be a roadworker and almost never at home) and when he finally does he becomes so injured and then so sick that he wonāt be able to work.
Thatās all Folks 
Iāll keep you updated.
Thanks once again for all your support, it means a lot
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Day 264. Have not checked in for a minute. Not much to say i suppose, work is ok. Still feeling taken advantage of in alot of areas around work. But idk im just grateful to have a job. Things with heather are going good, hang out alot and have fun. 1 on 1 session today so that will be nice. Idk keep doing what yall doing. Much love
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Day 904
Last overnight shift with my son is finally over. We should have nurses for the rest of the month now. I am tired for sure, but im going to make the best out of this day. I already had my shower and am sipping on my coffee, trying to gain some energy. Then ill begin to tidy up the apartment. Hubby is out tattooing so once he gets home (depending on how im feeling), i might go for a workout. Todays focus is going to be on maintaining good nutrition. Eating healthy foods and in the right portions. Not much else to say. Going to do my prayer and get on with my day! 
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Thank you for update. Praying hubby in good hands and all will be well.
You are doing great! Glad to know you know a drink will not cure a single thing. Reach out to cry , vent or ask for anything to help you get through this I believe in God and praying for you and your family.
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Of course Weāre kinda in the same grade, and I appreciate you too! Theyāre not kidding when they say it takes a while to get better. Iām going to abide by the advice that says not to make too many huge changes too early. In a lot of ways I already have, so Iāll keep steady. No big move yet. But Iāll go out and make a few (flexible) clams. 
Iāve got a garden and house to finish too.
Glad to be here with you. I know youāre having a breakthrough too and itās really cool to witness. Thank you and take care!
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Day 3, When i was not drinking the first time I was so motivated to work out and get back in shape. Then i slipped for about 6-8 weeks and i lost my motivation , gained some weight back, got bloated and felt like poo. I just finished ny work out and am embarking on carnivore again. Want to stay focused this time. I simply cant drink. I turn into something else, its like a monster comes out and I turn mean. Anyway heres to day 3. One day at a time.
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I am praying hard for you and your family. I pray work to be done within your family and your husband free of this scary situation. In the powerful name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
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Itās good to see you. Stick with this version of yourself. We enjoy your company 
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Oh man sorry to hear this. Sounds really stressful. Good they got results so quickly but sorry that he is in risk for a stroke. Really hope that he improves quickly. Will be thinking of you guys.
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Congratulations on 7 months!! Thatās such great progress and very inspiring! Thanks for sharing! 
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120 days sober. Iāll stay sober today too.
Today my youngest started school (Kindergarten) and my 3rd grader started a new school. It was very hard for my sensitive little 3rd grader who did the best she could to hold back her tears. I broke down in tears myself when I got in the car.
Tomorrow the older kids go back to middle school and high school. This will mark the first time Iāve been home alone in 9 years. Kinda looking forward to it.
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