@Butterflymoonwoman
Happy Birthday!!!
Hope you have a really lovely day 
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Hey all, checking in on day 1633. I hope everybody has a good one!
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Checking in on day
572 no alcohol
81 no form of marijuana
212 no nicotine
Helping out a different store today
A little extra time and z little extra money 
Have a wonderful day everyone
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Thanks Dirk! Yeah, i think its time to let boys bike to school. My inner always-worried-self doesnāt like this idea cause itās very stressful for me, pay attention to 3 still little but super active boys. All 3 of them have different dynamics and the one who is the fastest is ofcourse also the one who doesnāt listen the most. We will see.
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@Butterflymoonwoman A very happy birthday to you friend, and so many happy returns 
Enjoy your very special day!
@Amy30 Good hand lotion is worth a lot. Especially one that makes your hands feel great and where you really like the smell. So enjoy your advent surprise. The calendar looks very nice.
@SoberWalker I donāt think I have ever bin invested in someones plaster as I am here with yours 
Great countdown.
@Mischa84 So sorry you had that crash love. I remember having one with my cargo bike on ice a few years ago. No fun. These things weight a ton and when they fall on your legsā¦ I very much you will be out of bruises soon, and you can find a way to fix that bike 
@MrMoustache Good to hear your mood is in a good place. Sleep deprivation sucks. I hope you get good sleep soon.
@Dirk Iām with you on the first Austin Powers being the funniest one. Although I have to admit that I loved the āDutchā villain for his roller boogey skating shenenigans. Thanks for sharing that vid. I had so much fun watchig it: the choreography, the costumes. So much fun!
@zzz Thanks for the daily advent calender gif 
@HiyaKat Sorry to hear you are beset by so much anxiety. I find calming yoga and meditations on Insighter Timer very helpful. Hope you get to feel better soon.
@JP123 Loving your intention about avoiding harm. Good to see you checking in daily!
377 sugar
241 UPF
115 gluten
115 dairy
51 mindful eating
After yesterdayās faint spell I got thoroughly checked through by the medical establishment all morning till now. Some of the procedures were rather uncomfortable - especially the tilt table I can not recommend 
But at least I have a diagnosis and the reassurance that the important things like heart and circulatory system are ok.
So now Iām ordered to rest for the rest of the day and I am going to take doctorās orders very seriously here Video games, tv, reading, naps and very relaxing yoga. Thatās my day friends.
And TS reminded me that today is my one year TS anniversery. Sooo very life saving I found this community 
For todayās picture I am sharing a bit from my last November hike.
Peace and love for life always 
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I do photography as a business and I tend to hate everything I do creatively. Recently Iāve tried to push myself to do some new things and I again really donāt like how they turned out as usual. I know taking a break from it will give me less anxiety, but also less growth as a professional and less money. I wish I could get through that feeling if failure that sits so heavy on top of everything I do. I could hear 199 people say Iām great but I still think they are all lying. I donāt know why itās worse in the evening but itās becoming a huge hindrance to life in general. I will try to journal as replied above. Maybe I would normally shove those feelings down with alcohol and now Iām not? Maybe itās always been there and Iāve just always drank through it?
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Happy Tuesday!
IT IS COLD here in Chicagoland. Im delicate so should movev to somewhere warm haha.
Life is very lifey at the moment. I know however everything will work out as it should.
MAKE it an awesome day my friends!
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Day 1,636 clean and sober today. Insomnia kicked in last night and Iām exhausted this morning (further side effects of quitting my medication) and I hope it balances out soon. I hope everyone has a great day today, love you guys! 
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Day 16 AF. Had a great day.
Walked 10kms before breakfast. It felt awesome. Walking always makes me feel great. My legs are sore but it feels good.
I had to make a business presentation later in the day. Rode to the venue. It was a very pleasant ride. I love riding on the highway on my motorcycle. The presentation went off better than anyone expected and I got selected to lead a new project.
Later, i had a moment of temptation when I thought it would be so nice to go out and celebrate. Maybe have some beers. Just a few beers.
I was tempted, but it passed. I had to remind myself that I would be giving up everything that I have achieved in the past couple of weeks, and I would be back to where I started.
A few beers today will mean many many more tomorrow and then I will begin on the whisky. Soon I will be mixing beer and whisky. I have done it too many times before. I cannot do it anymore.
It is these moments I fear. When my mind tries to convince me that I ādeserve a drinkā and āone drink will not matterā.
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Thatās the kicker. Celebrate with a beer, etcā¦ it took me a while to get it in my head that alcohol does not equal celebrationā¦ itās the opposite, itās regret, illness, disappointment, embarrassment.
Weāve proven so many times in our lives what it leads to, and the small percentage of it being a good celebration can be counted in a hand.
Happy you refrained manā¦ itās a tough time of year to keep that straight in our head.
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Youāre completely right.
Do you think it is coincidence that your presentation went well, and that you were sober for 16 days before it? I know that in my own life that sort of success is connected to sobriety.
I used to be successful and drunk, but it came at the cost of everything else in my life. My health, my wellbeing, respect of my family. I had to focus so damn hard to succeed in one area that the rest just fell away. All because I was drunk or recovering. One or the other.
Congrats on 16 days, business success and keeping on the path
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Day 7 
Is good to be back to TS
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In my case, alcohol was a part of almost every celebration or social event. Any excuse was good enough for me to get drunk, and when I did not have an excuse I got drunk anyway, since I had nothing else to do 
Now whenever I think of anything - for example a barbecue, my mind instantly thinks of alcohol. So I have been avoiding everything. I am not sure I will be able to control myself if I go to an event where alcohol is being served and I would rather avoid any such stressful situations.
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Thank you James. May we never have to relive those dark days ever again.
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Day 15. Canāt shake this tired feeling. And definitely over indulging in sweets, maybe thereās a correlation?? Should probably look into thatā¦
Need to re-focus with my kids. Oldest, 12 he is being so oppositional!! Like dude, canāt we just have one normal morning without you starting shit??Middle little 10ā¦ Being sneaky, not following rules, lying & hiding stuff, and is officially grounded. My youngest is honestly being the best, and sheās my wild child, go figure. I definitely fell off as a parent due to my drinking everyday for over two years, probably closer to 5, if Iām being honest with myself.
Hereās to anther day sober.
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Happy birthday beautiful 40? You are looking fantastic. Hope today is all about you 
Sorry that you have to deal with it at all. Know you arenāt alone and can reach out during these episodes. We are here for you 
@JP123 I do hope your new ritual for starting off the day helps. The winky feeling did stay with me for a few months as I think I just wasnāt used to living in the present. Being aware of everything everyday was all nee and took a bit to get used to. Especially my emotional side - I hadnāt given that side a thought for so very long prior to sobriety. Keep doing what you areā¦all great positive steps forward
@HiyaKat 38+ days is fantastic. Are you able to fill the evening time with stuff to keep you busy? I found that I would need that distraction to keep me from wanting a drink or turning to old habits and find healthier ways to cope with our emotions that we tried to stiffle. It does take a while to rewire this brain of ours. Hope you are feeling better today 
maybe also putting positive affirmations around reminding yourself that your work is worthy and wonderful. We tend to be our own worst critics
@Just_Laura I hate when the neck gets twisted during sleep. Hope itās feeling better today. Wow! That is super cool about the tix. I do hope you go and enjoyā¦one of the shows I really wanna see too.
@Mischa84 oh no!!! Thatās awful Mischa. Iām sorry you fell and the bike may not be rideable. Grateful you werenāt hurt worse. Hope the pain subsides soon . Dang it- the boots were ruined too? Sorry love.
@seb wow - Iām really puzzled at how long itās taking them to get you an appointment. Iām sorry that you are being made to wait this long. Glad you had a good getaway and that you were not triggered at all. Thanks for posting more lovely pictures 
@acromouse rest easy my friend. So grateful that itās not something serious and you will heal. Awesome work - 1 year with TS today . Itās been so lovely having you here with us
@Chevy55 triple 3ās!!! Thatās awesome my friendā¦you are doing great work. Hope you are feeling better today
@BrownGecko you did great in working through the cravings and the addictions mental push. Keep that reminder of how hard itās been to get to this point and you donāt want to risk having to do it again. A risk cause we never know if we will be able to get back once we slip. Keep stacking up the days 
avoiding things for now is good. Focus on getting your sober muscles trained. Then you will be able to celebrate the things in life without association to alcohol. Takes time to rewire but it can be done
Oh yeah- big correlation. We are trying to replace all the sugar the alcohol had. I personally went for ice cream. For the better part of the first year I could not end the day without ice cream. I knew this was waaaayyyy better than the alcohol and I knew from stories that the system would finally regulate and I wouldnāt crave it as much. Now I am no longer in need of that fix. Keep pushing forward
Checking in on Tuesday morning
I feel like I slept decent. Still so damn fatigued and all that jazz. Gonna make it a good day today
Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day - sending you all so much love
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Then avoid them at all costs. If you arenāt certain you can stay sober then donāt go. Your sobriety is top concern.
You will get there one day but probably not this early on.
Until you are certain you can abstain, why take that risk? Your health, your work, your relationships, your success will thank you.
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23 days cheking in
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