I like the gum more because it’s a as needed thing
Patches I didn’t like dlso because it’s easy to overdue them but yes they did work. But the loszengs were the best for me
Name brand or store brand are both good
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Checking in day 334 AF 
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Day 1021
Very, very cold morning it is today. Struggled waking up for work. Would rather be home puttering around the apartment, getting things cleaned up, laundry done, and spending time with my family.
I managed to get to work on time even though the roads are terrible. Its going to be an easy laid back day today as my client is on a home visit. Hope everyone enjoys their day addiction free!
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Day 381. Hey sober fam, so yeah the other day i talked about my dad and well i did say something to him, he didnt say much, which i didnt set expectations on it but i was hoping to talk more and explain its not about presents, that id really like him to see the girls more. But idk, my step mom unsent her messages and that was it. Thanksgiving day came and i didnt get happy thanksgiving from either of them, nor anybody else in my family. Well my mom and daughters of course. But mostly issues are with my dads side. I mean they can post all these pictures of them on social media but idk. Im not trying to start a pitty party, i know i could be the bigger person as well and say hey happy thanksgiving as easy, but ive always been the odd dock out so part of me thinks well whats the point. Its things ill worry about later in life. I hung out with heather and we had a good time. The tech who did my ultrasound for my liver, said she is not aloud tell me yes or no that i have a fatty liver. I said can you guide me in a direction and she said it is showing resemblance of a fatty liver. So i do think ive been off about that a bit, definitely need to cut the sweets. This is where sometimes even when you are doing ok and feeling well mentally we can become very complacent. I understand only i can fix this. I like to think im pretty active with going and riding my wheel all the time, its a good workout, im outside climbing hills and all that. But still i guess i need to push myself a little more, burn calories in other ways and obviously eat healthier. Much love
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Checking in! 
I’ve just come back from the charity event that I attended as a volunteer for the flood victims in Valencia. The event turned out to be a success, a lot of people showed up, there was some cool music, nice atmosphere! In fact it’s still ongoing, my shift ended at 8:00 pm, the event goes until 00:00.
I had the booze stand next to me, and I was “working” at the food stand. That was a bit awkward in the beginning, with me being an alcoholic with an ED, but I didn’t touch the food (I had a decent healthy lunch so I wouldn’t go to the event hungry) and didn’t feel like drinking neither, despite everybody else sipping on beers. I took my thermo with tea - talking about weirdos in the house! 
That was actually the best idea ever, because it was quite cold and extremely humid once the sun set! Now I’m sitting on my couch with another cup of green tea with orange ginger flavor!
Feeling good for getting out of my comfort zone, by meeting new people, and just leaving the house other than for work.
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Day 277 check in. First full day back from vacation. Glad to be home! I love where I live.
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Day 706
Checking in late. I’m early to bed, early to rise type of person, so I’m in bed now at 9pm here.
Relatively quiet day. Went to visit family, then came home and went out in the dark and rain for a run. Running really is my therapy. Played with my cats then went to bed.
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Day 525
Rubbish day. Lots of rubbish family tensions…so I’m being quiet and waiting to get some sleep.
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2nd check-in Expectation is bucket full tree less. I’ve picked 3. It is fun to work with my very favorite color. If I sit long enough the birds help out.
And there is another tree.
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Day 274
Quiet day. Did a patrol and chatted with another bored cop about the rowdy turkeys. 
. I like how it’s the most dangerous thing happening in the neighborhood right now… I’m very grateful for that. So, they’re starting to challenge the little police cruiser and give chase. For big clumsy dumb birds, they are fast!! They haven’t started attacking the car yet but will soon. The police are already strategizing. 
I think we need a Turkey Situation Room…. They must be brought to heel! There was quite a neighborhood kerfuffle about aggressive Tom and his friends last year. Knocked a few people down. Must protect and serve! Ideally, I need a scone in one hand and binoculars in the other like my English cop heroes. Stakeout and then? Hehehe…I’m not sure!
It sure was a beautiful crisp sunny day. Glad I got out despite the sad feelings around the holiday. I’m going to decorate a bit tomorrow, pack Monday, and hit the road Tuesday. Holidays are difficult, and all the tension in the air is not helping. I’m avoiding abusive, angry people at all costs. Lots of bobbing and weaving going on, and I’m tired. 
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@Juli1 Well done on 10 months! 
@Lastry In the last few years my drinking, I never got headaches. When I quit(both times), I suffered daily headaches for over a month. No doubt in connection to the absence of alcohol. Stay hydrated. Even when it feels like I’m drinking enough water, I drink extra just in case bc I was dehydrating myself for years 
@CATMANCAM Sorry you’ve been having a tough time with things 
I understand how hard it can be when you have to take care of everything yourself. When I think about everything that has to get done, it paralyzes me so I can’t get anything done 
Days like that can make just taking a shower feel impossible, but I know if I force myself I’ll feel better. I’ve noticed music helps make it easier to move, for me. Then once I’m up, it’s easier to keep going. Still, those days I plan to accomplish stuff, but just can’t will myself to do it, do happen. Instead of feeling like I let myself down, I think of what I did accomplish, small as it may be. I got out of bed, I fed the cats, I didn’t drink 
Can’t expect to get a hole in one everyday. Press on, my friend
That fear runs deep in me. It took 3 years before I made it back here after the last time I had ‘just one drink’. Grateful to make it back at all 
@Lighter Those turkeys are out for revenge! 
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Day 63
I’ve had the opportunity to hang out with an old college buddy and his fam since yesterday and it’s been a breath of fresh air and something I needed. We’ve been in contact over the years but haven’t seen eachother for nearly 20 years. Got to tour the old campus and reminisce and also make new memories. I’ve had my fill again and again of Brazilian food prepared by his lovely wife. Life is good. ODAAT 
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Day 1021
Had a decent day at work. Was able to leave 1 hour early which was nice. Got home at 4pm and tried to take it easy. When i got home i noticed my son is sick so gave him some tylenol and cuddled with him. Will be taking tmrw off of work. Ill do laundry then and continue to cuddle him and care for him.
Right now im feeling abit down emotionally but ill be fine. I always am. I had a chat with my mom today and i miss her soo much. She gave me an early birthday gift which i was beyond grateful for. She etransfered me $200 to go towards gifts, cake, and supper for Tuesday (my 40th birthday). It made me feel really good to know that she trusts me enough and feels confident in my recovery enough, to send me money like that. I know i make her proud 
But I really miss her. And thats kind of got me bummed.
Anyway, just want to wish u all a good night. Love to u all
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Like jazzy said. Please go and see a nurse or doctor. They are there for you.
You made this huge effort going there. They are professionals, all the stuff is paid. A psychologist ist paid. You working in a school as a teacher are paid and still care for the kids. Your mind tries to find an excuse to talk you out of getting help. Don’t let it win.
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Sending healing vibes to your son. Hope he feels better soon.
Wow… what a great feeling to see how much faith a loved one had in us and our recovery… You should be super proud of yourself. Love that you were able to connect with your mom. It has got to be hard being so far away.
40th bday!!! A good celebratory birthday my friend. Excited to celebrate this with you in Tuesday 
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You’re neighborhood turkey stories crack me up! Hope you’re doing okay
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