Well shoot. They have a 5 year policy for the same thing that Mesa PD dq’d me for (using LSD in 04/2020). He said my test scores are awesome and I will do well and go far, but I need to wait until April before they can hire me, since it will have been 5 years by then. So now I’m looking into earning my EMT certification and applying to the fire department.
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8 days and 8 hours of being sober.
Today I had a really good day.
It’s like my head is clearer and I’m more present in the moment. At work I noticed that I have so much more focus. Really positive insights today 
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2y 8m 6d
well I was supposed to be placed in a virtual eating disorder program. they said for my case in person treatment is best. they said me doing virtual would be not very different from just therapy. but I am covered through a branch of Medicaid that doesn’t cover virtual anyway so I’d have to go the process of switching branches. she suggested i Look into a place 2hrs away and they have housing and bus to get to the center but I don’t know thats a really big commitment
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Is your eating problem that you eat too much or that you don’t eat enough? Are you either seriously underweight or seriously overweight? If you don’t feel like answering, that’s fine.
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I’m slightly overweight but I don’t eat enough. I’m lucky if I get 2 snacks a day
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15 days.
Got through another Friday night sober. Friday was always when I started drinking, until I started on Thursday. Then of course Monday to soothe the weekend hangover.
Instead I will hit the gym in the morning and have a happy, productive day.
Be well, all
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@icebear Grateful that sobriety is in tact! Sorry to hear about your rough week. Hope you are able to get a relaxing weekend to recharge 
@raspberry How did the dinner go? Glad you came in beforehand to stay accountable. SO true – Drinking does no good! Just saw your last post – sorry friend that you are feeling miserable (was it the FOMO?) Hope a good nights sleep helped.
Yeah – that would do it! You need to take care of your mental health too so please find time for self care and for you to recharge Way to go on your 200+ days of sobriety. Love it when it gets easier… only keeps getting better 
@butterflymoonwoman OMG – soo very excited! Very happy for you – so very proud my friend. What an amazing milestone. Hope your day continued to be beautiful 
I’m sorry love! Can’t be easy living with someone you are not happy with or like. It is easy for us to stop loving someone when they are not therefor us. Sending you love and strength! I do hope the test results come back soon so you don’t have to wait in anticipation. Hope you are healthy 
@scaredsmol OOH tooth aches are the worst – hope it improves soon
Well put and so proud of you! Your sobriety is of utmost importance and glad you were able to protect it.
@philipwithonel OOH that is nuts – grateful they did a proper check and are getting you a replacement aircraft. Be safe and enjoy the journey even with its setbacks! It is out of your control so find ways to make the best of it.
@wakikki Great to see you checking in and doing so well to get through life’s lifey moments and your symptoms sober. You are doing fantastic and I’m sure you family notices how well you are doing and all the effort you are putting forth.
@collins Man that bites but may be a blessing in disguise :shrugging_woman: Good luck with your EMT certificate and fire department. You will have many options at your disposal. Keep fighting for your future
I think this may be a good thing for you. One it will get you out of the house and in a different environment where someone hopefully is able to help. I do think your symptoms may get better when you are able to get your allotted daily nutrition. It is a big decision – wishing you luck in mulling it over
Checking in on Friday evening
688 days free of alcohol and weed
1103 days free of cigarettes
WOW - still just a few hours of sleep. Guess that is all i need these days. I am getting more slap happy as days go on. Spoke with my BIL tonight to help him vent through some issues but it also helped me feel connected. Was a good conversation.
Saw a lovely post this morning and its made me want to join in on the challenge of not complaining for 21 days… hoping to go way past that but lets start with this (today was good so far LOL)
Feeling worn down and tired. Gonna watch a Hallmark Mystery movie and try to do a mani / pedi.
Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day / evening – sending you all so much love
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Of course it is 100% up to you, but I was going to reply with exactly what Jazzy has written here.
Gets you in a new environment.
Learning how to eat in a healthy way will be good for you for the rest of your life. Jazzy ‘s whole quote didn’t copy.
Think about what else you’re going to be doing with your life if you don’t do that. It could be very interesting for you and informative
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at this point my health is awful and it’s probably because of my lack of eating I’ve always been this way. I know I need this but I’m terrified to be away for a month and then have to come back to the same toxic environment I think it might break me
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Could the month away be a good time/opportunity to evaluate if you want/need to go back?
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I have to come back home eventually I have no income right now
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Oh no, the urges are getting stronger now. I’m battling them but they’re stupid and I want them to go away
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It could be it will give you the confidence to not break and to get out on your own somehow.
Perhaps they have outpatient rehabilitation resources where they help people get back into society and on their own.
Suggesting you Google the place and see what the reviews are keeping in mind that a lot of people will have negative reviews just because they will have negative reviews.
I want to congratulate you for all your years and months and days of being self harm free. That’s a huge, huge huge accomplishment of yours and I’m very proud of you. I’m glad that you are on the site and that you say how you feel and that day by day, you have gotten that amount of time harm free.
Nothing wrong with you having anxiety about leaving your home. Nothing wrong with you not going because you don’t want to leave your home.
Think about it, think about the pros and the cons.
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Think of them as waves and let them wash over you.
You are stronger than the craves.
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I’ve seen mostly pros but I’m not going to get my hopes up with my luck they’ll deny me last minute
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Let’s do it together: we are not going to drink tonight and only worry about tomorrow when tomorrow comes. Deal? 
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Totally understand the hesitation and the anxiety. Sorry friend. I do hope that you are able to find a way to participate in this as I do think it would be super helpful. You deserve to feel better and have a happy life!
We are behind you no matter what you decide. 
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thank you♥️in all likelihood I will go forward with it but we’ll see what happens I’ll keep you guys posted
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Them urges can get intense. What are you doing this evening? I find that keeping myself as busy as possible helps. Stay away from triggers and put your license away so you can’t use it to get more alcohol. Getting through tonight one second at a time is the goal! Stay connected here - read around. Each day getting past the urges adds sober muscles – you are doing amazingly well!!!
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Day 252
Not sleeping well, so I’m tucked early in hoping I can break the streak tonight. Lots on my mind but that’s all right. It gets that way, sober. You can’t just switch off as easily. Like sometimes I have to resolve shit instead of pushing it aside—it’s really a good thing though it feels like trash at times🤔
I’m very happy to be working a schedule again and enjoying it. Very easy job- just perfect for coming back to life. Challenge is not committing to many other things since I have some momentum. I hate doing things gradually but I am gonna do just that! Still doing therapy and working on fitness and nutrition. I’m actually considering hobbies now…things like painting birds. These birds don’t generate money. You create them for fun . How could they not be monetized? Hahaha I guess they could but I’m probably not a master 
I’m so workaholic that I don’t understand hobbies and need to re-learn.
Good night. Maybe the Shakespeare and Hathaway show would be comforting. Plus magnesium glycinate.
Love y’all
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