499!
I’m going up there this afternoon. 
. 12000 feet up. Don’t t worry - driving most of way 
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Second check in today.
Guess I’m feeling a little lonely. I’ve gone out for another walk while I write this. I could be a bit hungry too, I’ll eat more when I get back. Zero desire to drink, I just don’t like the low feeling, which is unrealistic really. I also don’t like feeling lonely, it’s something I don’t like to admit to being.
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Checking in day 5 peeps. Much tougher day today but hitting bed still clean and focused. Very little energy today (i’m blaming the heat) and feel a little snappy.
Our friend is a singer and she had a gig at a local pub where all of circle of friends would have been. My partner wanted me to go with her and our 3 kids, at first I said okay but decided to stay home with our newborn just to be sure.
All in all positive that the weekend has come and gone and still clean but hopefully tomorrow i feel abit more me 
Hope you all had great weekends x
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589 days
Back at work this morning. Been on annual leave for close to a month. Was a good break and one I needed. Always a bit of a shock to the system heading back to work.
Got into work early so I can get a little gym workout in.
Lets see what the day brings
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Checking in on day 219
I’m noticing addictive tendencies in my behavior more lately, even though I’m staying away from drinking. That’s disappointing but not surprising. Does everyone here have an “addictive personality”? Is that just a bad excuse? I can control myself, i just feel like I’m often drawn…not to. Maybe it’s just escapism. I’m staying sober from alcohol, i guess i just need to work on the rest, now.
Today will be an easy day. I’m making spaghetti sauce in the crock pot, that’s always a win. I hope everyone is having a lovely sunday.
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Thank you very much @JazzyS and @eph-M-eral for your thoughtful words.
It was good to see my aunt and hold her 
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Checking in! I had a normal day off, some people might think the way I spent my day off sucks, but for me it’s a calming routine; did my weekly cleaning (it went on for 5 hours! 
) while listening to an audio book. Lunch, siesta 
and after that I went to the public pool for a while! Oh yes, and of course my cleaning obsession went on by cleaning my car! It had rained sand a few days ago, so it was very much needed! All chilled now, and looking forward to being off tomorrow (with no cleaning whatsoever! 
) It’s gonna be a morning walk, and breakfast in a cafe at the town “plaza”.
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Day 1366 AF
PMO 2.5
Good morning, fam. Happy Sunday.
I had insomnia last night due to my other addiction. Didn’t get much sleep. I was supposed to hit up a 7 AM AA meeting, but I slept through it. Woke up late. I know I can always jump on Zoom, but I like attending in person and interacting with other ppl.
Anyway, we’re heading to my friend’s daughter’s bday party in the afternoon at the park. I haven’t seen them in a minute. Should be a chill day.
Have a great day, everyone.
Take care. ODAAT
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Day 84
Lots of good things happening in life, makes me a little uneasy. I feel less safe, even though it is probably the opposite.
ODAAT
-Solar
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I for sure do. Youre not alone with this. I get addicted to things very easily. You made a good point that got me thinking tho… is it escapism that im trying to achieve? In some instances yes and in other instances no.
For example: Im addicted to my phone (definitly escapism and something im trying to work on. I can tell bcuz when im overwhelmed or stressed I mindlessly scroll). Im addicted to the gym. I used to be addicted to food (its gotten better since Ive started implementing a plan but again its escapism). I can easily get addicted to shopping. I get addicted to cleaning. I have been addicted to recovery even (thats not a bad thing lol). I tend to jump in head first for alot of activities/hobbies, where it almost becomes an obsession of sorts.
For me in recovery now, I try to find balance. Anything can be unhealthy when we obsess over something too much. For example, alot of people would say the gym is a healthy addiction. But for me, obsessing about it too much, is extremely unhealthy. I try to plan my day so that I am not overdoing it in one particular area. That way things are a bit more balanced. I think tho, when we quit our DOCs, our focus gets placed elsewhere. Its pretty normal to switch addictions, especially in early recovery. Its great that ur aware of ur behaviours tho! Thats amazing self awareness!! What sorts of behaviours are u noticing?
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530 days AF
Checking in sober.
Having very good moments with humans.
Befriending with my body.
By the triswim guide for olympic swimmers 
, I dropped my speed from 2.00 to 1.48 per 100 already. Amazing progress. And I did not swim any whole training plan, just did some technique drills. 
Swimming feels even more like flying now!
No urges.
Much love
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Day 2 1/2 sober. Struggling quite a bit. Woke up overwhelmed and depressed for a myriad of reasons. Very close to saying fuck it.
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Don’t give in. You only have to get through this one day, just today. You can do that much. 
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I know how good things happening can feel like you’re waiting for it all to come crashing down. But you deserve good things and you deserve to be present with them.
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The third day is one of the hardest to get through. Giving in won’t solve anything, Hope you get through it. Have you thought about Getting medical attention to help you get through the first couple of days/week? I don’t know your physical dependency, but for me a detox was necessary to come of my doc safely and alive. Wish you well 
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Thanks for responding @Butterflymoonwoman 
I’ve also noticed myself thinking too much about food and the gym. I have a history of an eating disorder so i manage those okay in recovery but i need to stay vigilant. Lately I’ve noticed addictive behaviors with my phone and with energy drinks most recently. I’ve never really cared for them until the last 2 weeks but the way I’m treating them feels a bit too familiar in recovery from alcohol. I’ve never struggled with caffeine but i think i need to set some boundaries with myself now. I’m not panicking by any means but it’s been on my mind. I remember when i started drinking i was aware that i was on a slippery slope but i went full speed ahead anyway. I don’t ever want to do that again. I guess i need to have more regard for myself and my health and to work on building a life that i dont want to escape.
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Fortunately, my physical detox symptoms have always been practically nonexistent. I’ve detoxed at an inpatient rehab facility before and the nurses always said I was an easy patient lol.
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Sorry to hear you’re dealing with a lot of stress - I hope things improve soon! But nice to see you still racking up the AF days! 
Those relapse dreams are pretty horrid aren’t they, I’ve had a few myself! Never anything that dramatic but just the sheer panic that sets in when I wake up and momentarily think I’ve thrown it all away!
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You sound very positive and optimistic in your post! Love it! Good for you Julia!
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I share with you 25 thousand hours without drinking. I know is a strange figure, but I considere it as a reward, because all of us, fighters against alcoholism, deserve a reward. It is not a problem give us from time to time a present.
I do not think in thousand hours, my next goal is being next 24 hours free. One day at a time.
We can do this.
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