Great news @Lisa07 thats a massive hurdle overcome
1 Like
Day 38 and 6. Things are a little better today. Registed on the In The Rooms website and attended my first online AA meeting today morning. Listening to other peopleās stories, made me realise how fortunate I am. I will try to attend another meeting tonight.
19 Likes
- Coffee. One day off, got to make my house presentable as my cousins daughter is coming to see if sheāll cat sit while Iām in Texas late March. Itās quite a mess right now. It will take my mind of my head troubles for a bit I hope. Reading more about BPD in between, and just made an appointment with my GP to talk about referral to a therapist. A little bit of progress right. Thanks @ifs for being a constant source of inspiration, sharing and keeping it real and stuff. Have a good day all. Sober and clean. Love from Amsterdam.
25 Likes
I never get the house quite how I want it for guests. Fortunately most people are happy with a place thatās basically hygienic. Being a good host is more about a warm welcome and plentiful access to food than a clean house. Thatās what I go for anyway 
10 Likes
Had a message today which made me realise I have retreated inwards and itās probably not what I need at the moment. Keep getting lost in my head with thoughts about everything and nothing, where I am and where I want to be.
Had my first CBT appointment a couple of weeks ago (therapist didnāt arrive in time for the second one 
) and something I am supposed to do is set some SMART goals. It has really got me in a spin.
Got a couple of days off work which are much needed. Hoping to catch up with some old friends and also work out how to prune some fruit bushes Iāve inherited.
24 Likes
Two things (old friends and pruning) that look very well suited for practising with SMART goals friend.
1 Like
No need to feel guilty girl. Im not sure what happend but he was for sure asupport for me aswell. But we still have the other amazing supportersā¤
1 Like
147.45
Still overly stressed about the whole partnership thing. I figured out how much I owe him for software, itās not much. Iām working on a spreadsheet that outlines my financial investment as well as the time investment. This is business and not personal. I have my approach and will stick to it. The numbers do not support his proposal, bottom line.
Got some crazy horse medicine to see if it helps with my rosacea. My daughter said she started a blog about all the crazy shit I do 
Speaking of whichā¦ I brought up yesterday about the host of a show that killed herself and how sad I thought it was. She had zero sympathy and said āboo hoo, she beat the shit out of her boyfriend and then couldnāt deal with the press for being such a piece of shit, sheās a garbage abuserā. This is the same daughter that put her freaking hands on me just over a week ago!!! The same one who completely forgives, and actually never cared, that her Dad almost killed me. Yet, she does loathe her stepdad for the same thing. Makes me feel small and unworthy. Iām so glad sheās moving out. The kid hates me. Yet she constantly craves my company Iām so confused and hurt by her.
17 Likes
Wow Beth, thats sounds way out of hand and harshā¦ she laid a hand on you?? Why does she even stay their if she āhates youā that much. You must be heartbroken 
. When will she move so you can get some peace and why would she start a blog on your behalf. (Sorry for being mad on your behalf)
1 Like
PSā¦ weird day ahead as well. A dude I dated shorty after leaving my husband, who dumped me because Iāve my drinking, hired me to find him space for his business. I have a tour and meeting with him today 
I really liked him, but donāt have respect for how he disappeared completely, ghosted, no response. We talked before I agreed to work with him and I led the discussion and he finally admitted that my drinking was the scariest thing heās ever seen. 
6 Likes
She moves out April 4th. I love her with all that I am, but Iām also terrified and always walk on eggshells. Sheās very entitled and offended by literally everything. She destroys me with words as well. I was a single mom and overly spoiled her because I felt guilty. So itās my fault. When I met her dad (he adopted her) we were a happy little family until he went into the army when she was around 12. He came back from Afghanistan with violent PTSD and of course itās all my fault.
3 Likes
It will be good when she does. But Ofcourse you love her with all your heart. But Walking on eggshells all the time creates anxeity and controls you in someway. I dont think at all the pstd is your fault and which mum with a guilty consious wouldnt spoil their child.
3 Likes
Day 49ā¦checking in friendsš
18 Likes
Youāve done the right thing booking a doctor appointment. Hope it goes well for you bud 
1 Like
@Hopeful777
Sober twin, I am glad your workout session was better!!! Keep it up and it will be second nature soon. 
@Mno
Hearing about your trip makes me want to plan something myself. Iāve never been to Texas, but always wanted to visit. Sometimes the anticipation is just as good as the trip itself. 
4 Likes
Day 29.32
I feel good this morning. I am starting to feel the residual fatigue setting in from the daily cycling challenge. I will be taking vitamin I (ibuprofen) soon to get through it. 
Work today, then meeting, then cycling challenge, then bed. I will have no time to eat tonight.
Stay sober everyone!!!ā 
16 Likes
Day 2 just checking in.
12 Likes
Jenni, I am on day 2 as well. Stay strong 
!
9 Likes
Way to go Kev!
1 Like
Day 119.
Argh! Started craving alcohol a couple of days ago, and the ānoiseā is ramping up. Milestone madness is real. 
27 Likes