great job on 5 months…
Checking in on day 466
Been feeling overwhelmed by life but definitely not going to drink or get high over it. Stay safe and sober out there everyone.
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five months! 
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Hello everyone, Day 219, and it’s been a great day today.
We were out walking this morning, and it was a beautiful morning.
He wasn’t this clean when we made it home.
It was a nice change from the beach, but oh so much more cleaning up to do.
Had a full day in the garden; things are really moving now.
A really productive first day off work.
I’ve never stopped all day, but I found a great rhythm today. I was completely immersed in the birdsong, first on our walk, then also in the garden while I was working all day.
Today has been a good one for sure.
Hope you all make the most of your day too.
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Day 169.
Feeling better after a good night’s sleep. Finally.
I’m starting to notice that my cravings rear their ugly heads most dramatically when I’m sleep deprived. I’ve been dealing with some pretty consistent sleep disturbances over the last few months. I wake up in the middle of the night for whatever reason (usually at some point between 2:30 - 4:00 a.m.) and am rendered totally unable to turn my brain off enough to fall back asleep. I’ve tried Advil PM on and off, but I hate feeling reliant on medications of any sort. Grateful that I slept through the night.
Today, I’m focused on just getting through the day. I’m in a bare-minimum mood. I read something yesterday that said, “Instead of focusing on, ‘How fast can I get this thing done?’ I’m going to start focusing on, ‘How relaxed can I be while doing this?’” Succinctly, it laid out exactly what I’ve been working on lately. Regulating my nervous system. Stopping the constant running to-do list in my brain. Not needing to rush through every moment of every day of my life. Just being. Giving myself permission to exist and move slowly. With intention and care.
I have poetry class tonight. I really don’t feel up to going, but unfortunately, I need to. Giving myself permission to crawl through the day. Just do what is absolutely and 100% necessary. Shower. Zoom meeting for a gig at noon. Camera off. Sit in the sun for a few minutes. Go to class. Listen. Choosing to be a passive participant today. Cook dinner. Maybe take a bath. Is year 2 of grad school too early to be feeling senioritis? One year left.
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Thank you for the advice, I will think about that! Actually I’ve never tried to aim for any kind of a balance when it comes to sports, but it makes sense to build some balance for the future and be more mindful about that. It makes the change less forced.
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Evening check-in
Not much to report. I had a good day off today. Went for lunch at my friends, once I got home I did a siesta! 
I also went for a 7K walk in the afternoon, tomorrow I have to go back to work! After 5 days off, it’s gonna be an early wake up!
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Day 147
To and from the hospital looks like it’s going to be for a while yet. Took ages to get home most of the main roads were closed off.
The sun was out and the dogs had a nice sunbathe on their swing seat this afternoon.
No cravings at all which is good to see.
Hope you’ve all had a good day
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Checking in, sober and smoke-free. It was a productive day work wise and also had a good time with the kids. In the evening I had a great table tennis session, I played with someone who is better than me and I could learn so much from the game. It was exhausting both physically and mentally, but I enjoyed it a lot. But I couldn’t help but thinking about smoking a cigarette all the way cycling home, to take the edge off this feeling, to blunt this rush of adrenaline. Positive feelings are bigger triggers for me that the negative ones, I feel powerless against them, I don’t know how to deal with them, so I’m glad I just came home, drank a lot of water and ate some food.
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Checking in - I chaired our morning AA meeting and did not share. I let the silence be until someone else spoke.
Followed up with a nice long gym sesh and a short shopping trip. Back home, I felt cautious after the fight yesterday, but we got along well. Took a walk in the snow and wind (goddamit, Mother Nature, it’s Spring already!) together. One of my old coping mechanisms is diverting attention away from me and away from any troubles the spouse and I are having, and I used it again today, as soon as the walk started, I brought up politics and let her rant on for just about the full half hour of the walk.
If I do not drink tonight and tomorrow I will mark 21 years since my last drink. But that’s 24 hours from now, and I need to stay in this moment.
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Day 46. Still on holiday and enjoying time with my family.
This is easy street - no stress and therefore no cravings. I’m going to enjoy that whilst it lasts. I used to get cravings on holidays because I missed the “fun times” drinking. I don’t any more, and for that I am very grateful. I do still substitute a bit mind you… off to the gym now to earn something sweet tonight 
. Well, it’s a lot better than drinking!
I hope you all have as good a day as you all can.
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I don’t believe this is entirely true. You said it just a few sentences before: you can’t imagine not being able to run. But, I do believe it’s much deeper than that.
What would it mean to accept you’re not physically well? What’s so threatening about it, that you can’t let yourself feel safe enough to acknowledge that you need help?
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Not sure what you have tried in terms of sleep, but after almost 20yrs of shift work and disordered sleep I can tell you what works for me.
Anytime im trying to sleep (on my own, when my wife is there I don’t need to do this) I play lofi music. Just loud enough to faintly hear it.
I started with different Playlist/episodes on YouTube music but have since settled on one or two. I play the same ones every time I want to sleep. They are 8-10hrs long but I generally put a sleep timer on. I guess its just a conditioning thing.
‘Raining in Osaka’ is the main one I use if you’re interested 
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When I awaken in the early morning and the old committee starts its meeting, I can use the serenity prayer as a mantra to quiet them and put me back to sleep. Over 50% effective for me, but the rest of the time, I get up and read something or do something, that quiets the committee and starts my day out on a better footing.
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Checking in Day 1, Week 2
I was going to start my check in with how my day was, but @BlancheDuBois has knocked me for 6 with a nugget of truth I didn’t know I needed:
Focus on how relaxed I can be whilst getting through the day rather than how quickly I can get through it.
Amazing. I also love:
Accept that some days you are going to do the bare minimum and thats ok.
Paraphrased / misquoted both times but still. Thank you so much, your perspective was just what I needed to hear!
Nothing much more to add to that. A good, if busy day for me. Funnily enough I was going to write about how I struggle to prioritise my own self care on a busy day, now I have something to mull over as I journal tonight.
Have a great sober day all.
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A-464 C-408 THC-190 N-126
Busy day today, I’ve been in charge of all three kids for like 9 hours, so I’m gonna go to bed early tonight, I’m already beat! I’m thankful the rest of the week is the usual schedule.
I’m grateful for being witness to children’s imaginations, for public parks, and for power naps 
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That’s funny, I have shift work variability too. I listen to sobriety podcasts, and one favorite is Sober Talk SA. No adverts, just Anglo-born Dennis and his Aussie AA friends.
I hear Chris Hemsworth offers meditations that a lot of ppl at work use, called Power Sleep., I think. Subscription, but maybe samples on YT.
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Checking in day 263. Just read the BB thread here, the chapter called To Employers. I’m still living in the mystery of absence of cravings, a state of grace, but every time I hear a relapse story, I consider it carefully: one casual decision could lead me to a choice that might cause me to lose my footing. The worst part is, I can’t be sure in advance how long the glissade might be, how severe the injuries and consequences. For me, for today, it’s easier to absolutely remain committed and connected. Grateful.
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I found with podcasts i would sometimes get too interested and end up just staying awake listening haha. Thats when I switched to lofi, or sometimes prayer meditations.
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