Daily high: Had a free breakfast at work
Daily low: Didn’t get as much done at work as I should have, could have.
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High: Got my favorite ice cream from an ice cream place on the river.
I don’t really have much of a low for today, it has just been a good day! Weather was great and we got out and enjoyed it!
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Wish I could say I was, but I’m not. I’m struggling so bad. Last night, I went out for a drive and was determined to buy a bottle and drink it at home. But for some reason I just couldn’t bring myself to stop at the store. It’s for the better, but it is also revealing the condition of my heart from right now. I am in pieces on the inside. I’m completely dissatisfied with my life … especially my marriage. I feel totally alone. I think about dying every day. Not in a good place.
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I was in a similar situation last summer. Determined to by a bottle of wine I got on my bike. Made it to the gas station and stood in front of the wine section. And I was sooo scared. Scared to take that bottle. I knew the outcome so well. This won’t change anything. What did help? Talking, writing it off my chest. Being 100 % sure that taking this drink will be the step in the wrong direction. It won’t help. You know that. We all know that. And it’s hard to walk with eyes wide open through life. But it’s soooo worth it. And you know it and we all know it. 
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I am waiting for my job to start again or the stimulus so I can pay for my gym membership. I filed my taxes yesterday. Was a high point and is still carrying.
Low is just knowing how much people I can’t connect because of the bridges I broke because of my alcohol.
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My high today spending time with my grandson my low today having stomach issues
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My high today was visiting my kids my low today was the rain I wanted to do more yard work
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Daily High - I made it to day 5 sober! It’s a great feeling waking up everyday with a clear mind! I have more energy & and less irritable!
Daily low - Hard day at work, but I got through it!
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Today’s high! … first Monday in a long time I have felt positive and excited for the week ahead!
Lows: for some reason since last night I have really itchy skin. I’m 9 days sober. Is it a symptom of detox?
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Monday High: watched a Dave Chapelle clip tonight that literally made me burst into laughter. I can’t even remember the last time I truly laughed. Felt good.
Monday Low: pretty much everything else. Life just sucks right now.
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@cwak…without knowing you better…I can only say I hope you can find support. Soon. Thoughts of dying are very serious. But you know that. And drinking? Well, that helps nothing. I’m glad you shared. I do hope it helped.
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Thank you for caring. It is helpful. I’m still sober. I’m in therapy. I’m trying. I’m not prepared to go to the hospital. I’m really hoping talk therapy can bring about the changes I need. It also hit me over the weekend that I’m coming up on the anniversary of a significantly traumatic event in my life, so that doesn’t help anything.
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Therapy is good…with the right therapist. I worked last year on reducing negative self-talk. Bringing up crap from years ago and berating myself over it. Yeah, that’s helpful. Sarcasm aside, it was very helpful. When I start doing that I have tools to use to send my thoughts in a different direction. Sadly, if you live long enough, traumatic events are likely to occur. I will be sending positives your way this week.
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My high today was my workout how good I always feel after. And I have 6 months today. My low having my feelings dismissed
Thank you. I did some research and found this
I had an epsom salt bath last night and the itching has lessened:-)
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Tuesday…
High: went fishing (caught nothing, but honestly that’s not the point for me)
Low: I hate my marriage right now. Hate it.
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Sorry to hear your low. That has to be rough. Hope you get more days fishing to keep your spirits up
High: inexplicable back pain has waned. Not gone but much better after four or five rough days.
Low: still too damned cold around here. Come on spring.