Daily Reflections & Daily Readings

Motivation
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August 12~Daily Reflections

A LOOK BACKWARD

First, we take a look backward and try to discover where we have been at fault; next we make a vigorous attempt to repair the damage we have done; . . .
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 77

As a traveler on a fresh and exciting A.A. journey of recovery, I experienced a newfound peace of mind and the horizon appeared clear and bright, rather than obscure and dim. Reviewing my life to discover where I had been at fault seemed to be such an arduous and dangerous task. It was painful to pause and look backward. I was afraid I might stumble! Couldn’t I put the past out of my mind and just live in my new golden present? I realized that those in the past whom I had harmed stood between me and my desire to continue my movement toward serenity. I had to ask for courage to face those persons from my life who still lived in my conscience, to recognize and deal with the guilt that their presence produced in me. I had to look at the damage I had done, and become willing to make amends. Only then could my journey of the spirit resume.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

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August 12~Language Of Letting Go

Directness

Direct people are a joy to be around.

We never have to guess what they’re really thinking or feeling, because they’re honest about their thoughts and openly express their feelings.

We never have to wonder if they’re with us because they want to be, or if they’re there out of guilt and obligation.

When they do something for us, we don’t have to worry whether they’ll end up resenting us because direct people generally do things that please themselves.

We don’t have to fuss about the status of our relationship because if we ask, they’ll tell us.

We don’t have to worry if they’re angry because they deal openly with their anger and resolve it quickly.

We don’t have to ponder whether they are talking about us behind our backs because if they have something to say it will be said to us directly.

We don’t have to wonder if we can rely on them because direct people are trustworthy.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we were all direct?

Today, I will let go of my notions that it is somehow good or desirable to be indirect. Instead, I will strive for honesty, directness, and clarity in my communication. I will let directness in my relationships begin with me.

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August 12~Walk In Dry Places

Things I can’t fix

Acceptance.

One of the sad realities of life is that we’re awash in disorder that we can’t fix. All around us, the world
seethes and festers with aliments and injustices that are beyond our control.

We can react by becoming angry or by making quixotic efforts to solve some of these problems.

Our best course, however, is to apply our 12 Step program to life in this world. The Serenity Prayer suggests we accept what we can’t change.

A slogan reminds us to set priorities (“First things First.”) The Eleventh Step remind us to always seek God’s will.

This will enable me to live effectively while doing my best to serve others. In time, I may even discover
that I can fix a few of the seemingly insoluble problems around me.

I’ll realize today that I have the ability only to do certain things within my sphere of experience. I’ll see to it, however, that I do these things well.

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August 12~Keep It Simple

Fairness is what justice really is. —The last Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart

Some of us get hung up on what’s fair. We might feel, because we’ve worked hard to stay sober, we
should be rewarded. We might keep score of what we get and what others get. And we complain if it’s
“not fair.”

Maybe we should be glad life isn’t fair. Why? Most of us caused a lot of trouble we’ve never had to pay
for. And we’ve hurt a lot of people who haven’t gotten even. Would we really want life to be fair?

Our Higher Power isn’t fair either. That is, our Higher Power doesn’t keep score. Our Higher Power doesn’t try to get even. Our Higher Power is loving and forgiving, no matter what. Our Higher Power has
the same love and help for everyone.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, give me the wisdom to stop keeping score. Help me want the best for everyone.

Action for the Day: I’ll list five times I’ve been unfair to others. Do I need to make amends?

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August 12~NA Just For Today

Enough!

“Something inside cries out, 'Enough, enough, I’ve had enough; and then they are ready to take that first
and often most difficult step toward dealing with their disease.”~Basic Text, p.203

Have we really had enough? This is the crucial question we must ask ourselves as we prepare to work the First Step in Narcotics Anonymous.

It doesn’t matter whether or not we arrived in NA with our families intact, our careers still working for us, and all the outward appearances of wholeness.

All that matters is that we have reached an emotional and spiritual bottom that precludes our return to active addiction. If we have, we will be truly ready to go to any lengths to quit using.

When we inventory our powerlessness, we ask ourselves some simple questions. Can I control my use of drugs in any form? What incidents have occurred as a result of my drug use that I didn’t want to happen? How is my life unmanageable? Do I believe in my heart that I am an addict?

If the answers to these questions lead us to the doors of Narcotics Anonymous, then we are ready to move on to the next step toward a life free from active addiction.

If we have truly had enough, then we will be willing to go to ANY lengths to find recovery.

Just for today: I admit that I have had enough. I am ready to work my First Step.

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August 12~Today’s Gift

I don’t think of all the misery, but of the beauty that still remains. --Anne Frank

We don’t find the rewards of today by searching through our misfortunes. Pausing to seek out something good for everything we find bad is a step in the right direction. We may find the good outweighs the bad.

But how much more chance we will have of living a happy day if we skip over our setbacks and concentrate as much as we can on what is going well. It is smarter to look for diamonds in a diamond
mine than in a garbage dump.

Let us discard our failures, using only what we have learned from them to achieve success. Looking back
at missed opportunities will make it impossible for us to recognize new chances to enjoy life to the fullest.

Looking only for beauty is a beautiful thing in itself.
What beauty can I see around me right now?

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August 13~Daily Reflections

A CLEAN SWEEP

. . . and third, having thus cleaned away the debris of the past, we consider how, with our newfound knowledge of ourselves, we may develop the best possible relations with every human being we know.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 77

As I faced the Eighth Step, everything that was required for successful completion of the previous seven Steps came together: courage, honesty, sincerity, willingness and thoroughness, I could not muster the strength required for this task at the beginning, which is why this Step reads "Became willing. . . . "

I needed to develop the courage to begin, the honesty to see where I was wrong, a sincere desire to set things right, thoroughness in making a list, and willingness to take the risks required for true humility. With the help of my Higher Power in developing these virtues, I completed this Step and continued to move forward in my quest for spiritual growth.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

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August 13~Language Of Letting Go

Friends

Don’t overlook the value of friendship. Don’t neglect friends.

Friends are a joy. Adult friendships can be a good place for us to learn to have fun and to appreciate how much fun we can have with a friend.

Friends can be a comfort. Who knows us better, or is more able to give us support, than a good friend? A friendship is a comfortable place to be ourselves. Often, our choice of friends will reflect the issues we’re working on. Giving and receiving support will help both people grow.

Some friendships wax and wane, going through cycles throughout the years. Some trail off when one person outgrows the other. Certainly, we will have trials and tests in friendships and, at times, be called on to practice our recovery behaviors.

But some friendships will last a lifetime. There are special love relationships, and there are friendships. Sometimes, our friendships—especially recovery friendships—can be special love relationships too.

Today, I will reach out to a friend. I will let myself enjoy the comfort, joys, and enduring quality of my friendships.

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August 13~Walk In Dry Places

Blaming others

Common sense

Action NO matter what happens, some people insist that a culprit must be found when things go awry.
Someone must be blamed for every wrong or catastrophe.

We must be careful not to buy into this practice in three ways:
FIRST, we must avoid being help responsible for problems we didn’t cause.
SECOND, we must also avoid any personal guilt for such problems.
THIRD, we must not fall into the trap of unfairly blaming other people.

The best use of energy we spend hunting down culprits is to fix what’s within our powers, to have the
courage to change the things (we) can. Then we will have done what we can to reduce the number of problems in the world while putting our own talents and energies to their best uses.

I’ll keep some balance today if I hear anybody blaming others for the world’s woes. We’ll probably fix most problems one day at a time, and I’ll do the best I can with those problems I know something about.

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August 13~Keep It Simple

Once it[a spoken word] flies out, you can’t catch it. —Russian proverb

We’ve said many mean words. Our words often hurt the people we love. We can never really take back
the words. But we’re learning now to speak with care. We know the words have a lot of power.

What do we say when we’re angry? When we want something? When we’re trying to be kind?

Now, think about this: people will remember out words. If we’re honest and careful in our speech, people will respect us. But if we say things to force our will, we may be sorry later.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, speak through me today.

Action for the Day: Today, I’ll ask one question of the person I love the most: “How have my words hurt
you in the past?” Then I’ll talk with my sponsor about this.

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August 13~NA Just For Today

Difficult People

By giving unconditional love
we become more loving, and by sharing spiritual growth we become more spiritual." Basic Text, p.99

Most of us have one or two exceptionally difficult people in our lives. How do we deal with such a person in our recovery? First, we take our own inventory. Have we wronged this person? Has some action or attitude of ours served as an invitation for the kind of treatment they have given us? If so, we will want to clear the air, admit we have been wrong, and ask our Higher Power to remove whatever defects may prevent us from being helpful and constructive.

Next, as people seeking to live spiritually oriented lives, we approach the problem from the other person’s point of view. They may be faced with any number of challenges we either fail to consider or know nothing about, challenges that cause them to be unpleasant. As it’s said, we seek in recovery “to forgive rather than be forgiven; to understand rather than be understood.”

Finally, if it is within our power, we seek ways to help others overcome their challenges without injuring
their dignity. We pray for their well-being and spiritual growth and for the ability to offer them the
unconditional love that has meant so much to us in our recovery.

We cannot change the difficult people in our lives, nor can we please everyone. But by applying the
spiritual principles we’ve learned in NA, we can learn to love them.

Just for today: Higher Power, help me serve other people, not demand that they serve me.

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August 13~Today’s Gift
Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them. -Brendan Francis

There was a huge slide at the park and Jason was afraid to go on it. There were so many steps to climb to reach the top. All of his friends were climbing up the steps and yelling as they came down the long rolling slide.

“Come on,” said his friend Steve. “It’s lots of fun!”
“Isn’t it scary?” asked Jason.
“A little bit,” answered Steve, “but you get used to it.” He ran off to go again.

Jason walked to the steps of the slide, his heart pounding in his chest. Slowly he placed his foot on the first step and lifted himself up. Courageously he climbed the ladder. When he reached the high platform he felt as if he were standing on top of the world.

We can learn from Jason that by taking that first step we can experience many exciting and wonderful things. We have all done it before, on the slide, on a bicycle, in school. Why not again?

What fear can I walk through today?

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August 13~Touchstones

There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will treat
others with respect, kindness, and generosity.
People who do not experience self-love have little or no capacity to love others. --Nathaniel Branden

We cannot hang on to feelings of shame and guilt and still hope to become better people. How did these feelings begin? If we were treated badly by people, we need to be honest about what happened so we can resolve it and move on.

Have we perpetuated our feelings by acting disrespectfully ourselves? Then we need to take a thorough inventory of our wrongdoings, admit them, make repairs, and let them go.

We may wallow in shame because facing it feels too frightening. Often, we believe our shame is greater
than that of others. This belief is usually untrue and grandiose. It’s part of how we isolate ourselves. We
don’t have to face it alone. We have the help of other men and women who can listen to our pain and tell
us about their experiences.

Today, may I find the courage to face my shame and assert my right to self-esteem.

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Wow this is a tough one. I just don’t want to do it. I want forgiveness and be understood. Me me me. Oh ok I will strive to do this. Thank you for sharing. :hugs:

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Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them. -Brendan Francis 

love this thank you :heart: @MandiH

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August 14~Daily Reflections

REPAIRING THE DAMAGE

We attempt to sweep away the debris which has accumulated out of our effort to live on self-will and run the show ourselves. If we haven’t the will to do this, we ask until it comes. Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 76

Making a list of people I had harmed was not a particularly difficult thing to do. They had showed up in my Fourth Step inventory: people towards whom I had resentments, real or imagined, and whom I had hurt by acts of retaliation. For my recovery to be thorough, I believed it was not important for those who had legitimately harmed me to make amends to me. What is important in my relationship with God is that I stand before Him, knowing I have done what I can to repair the damage I have done.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

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August 14~Language Of Letting Go

Owning Our Power

Many of us have someone in our life who challenges our ability to trust and care for ourselves.

When we hear that person’s voice or are in his or her presence, we may forget all we know about what is real, about how to own our power, about how to be direct, about what we know and believe to be true, about how important we are.

We give up our power to that person. The child in us gets hooked with a mixture of powerful feelings—love, fear, or anger. We may feel trapped, helpless, or so attracted that we can’t think straight. There may be a powerful tug-of-war going between feelings of anger and our need to be loved and accepted, or between our head and our heart.

We may be so enamored or intimidated that we revert to our belief that we can’t react or respond to this person any differently.

We get hooked.

We don’t have to stay under a spell.

We start by becoming aware of the people who hook us, and then accepting that.

We can force ourselves through the motions of reacting differently to that person, even if that new reaction is awkward and uncomfortable.

Search out our motivations. Are we somehow trying to control or influence the other person? We cannot change the other person, but we can stop playing our part of the game. One good way to do this is by detaching and letting go of any need to control.

The next step is learning to own our power to take care of ourselves, to be who we are free from their influence. We can learn to own our power with difficult people. It may not happen overnight, but we can begin, today, to change our self-defeating reactions to the people who have hooked us.

God, help me identify the relationships where I have forfeited my power. Help me unhook and begin owning my power.

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August 14~Walk In Dry Places

Wasting Time

Time management

In dealing with our personal shortcomings, we may find traits of immaturity. For example, we might
waste time doing the things we like to do rather than the things we must do.

We sometimes find a way to justify this. Drinking coffee with friends might be called “having a meeting” even when it goes far beyond normal limits and uses up time that should be devoted to family and work responsibilities.

Without becoming workaholics or drudges, we do need to be hones about our habits. If we’re wasting too much time, it could be at the expense of things that need to be attended to promptly. When we waste time, we often have to work twice as hard to catch up later on. Let’s be honest about the management of our time.

I’ll watch how I spend my time today. If I’m spending too much time socializing, I’ll put myself on a
reasonable schedule that balances both leisure and work.

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August 14~Keep It Simple

The best side of a saloon is outside.—Anonymous

We need to stay away from places where we used to drink or use other drugs. Sometimes we need to stay
away from our old using friends. But some days it’s hard to stay away. We remember the fun times. Or we want a quick fix for our problems.

When we feel like this, we know something is wrong. We can call our sponsor and talk about it. And get to a meeting. We need to remember how much better our lives are now.

We don’t want our old lives back.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me stay away from trouble. Thanks for keeping me sober today.

Action for the Day: Today, I’ll make a list of places that mean trouble for me—places I need to stay away from.

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August 14~Each Day a New Beginning

Often when we’re being tough and strong, we’re scared. It takes a lot of courage to allow ourselves to be vulnerable, to be soft. --Dudley Martineau

We’ve developed defenses for protection because we have felt the need for protection from the abuses of others, parents on occasion, bosses, spouses, even strangers. And in certain situations, our defenses served us well for a time. However, they have taken their toll.

Hiding behind them for long makes them habitual, and we move farther and farther away from our center, from the woman each of us needs and wants to be.

Exposing who we really are invites judgment, sometimes rejection, often times discounting. It’s a terribly hard risk to take, and the rewards are seldom immediate. But with time, others respect us for our
vulnerability and begin to imitate our example. We are served well by our integrity, in due time.

Letting others see who we really are alleviates confusion, theirs and ours. We no longer need to decide who we should be; we simply are who we are. Our choices are simplified.

There is only one appropriate choice to every situation–the one that is honest and wholly reflective of who we are at that moment.

Rewards will be forthcoming when I am honest

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