Daily Reflections & Daily Readings

[MandiH]

December 21~Walk In Dry Places

Keeping the Faith with Guidance

Good Orderly Direction

Does guidance from our Higher Power always come through? We must believe that it does, even when
we don’t seem to receive a visible answer.

Spiritual guidance usually doesn’t come as we think it should. What we’re likely to find instead is that
over time, a number of unrelated events come together for a good purpose. Although this appears to be chance or coincidence, very important outcomes often develop from simple happenings___ maybe just from meeting someone on the street.

We can never really determine how any chain of events will play out.

The best we can do is to continue seeking guidance while following the highest principles in our program. Many chance happenings will be
recognized as guidance when we look back at an entire chain of events.

My best way to seek guidance is simply to remember today that my life and affairs are in God’s care and keeping. The highest good will come from this.

[MandiH]

December 21~Keep It Simple

Don’t give your advice before you are called upon. Desiderius Erasmus

If someone wants your advice, the person will ask for it.

That’s one reason why in Twelve Step programs we don’t go around trying to talk people into joining. But people will ask us for advice. They’ll see how we’ve changed, and they’ll want what we have. All we have to do is tell them where we found it–in AA, NA or another Twelve Step group. We don’t tell them what to do. We tell them our own story–what it was like, what happened, and where we are now. And we invite them to join us.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me carry the healing message of the program to these who ask
for advice.

Action for the Day: I’ll make a decision to spend time with the next person who ask for my help.

[MandiH]

December 22~Daily Reflections

PRINCIPLES, NOT PERSONALITIES

The way our “worthy” alcoholics have sometimes tried to judge the “less worthy” is, as we look back on it, rather comical. Imagine, if you can, one alcoholic judging another!
THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 37

Who am I to judge anyone? When I first entered the Fellowship I found that I liked everyone. After all, A.A. was going to help me to a better way of life without alcohol. The reality was that I couldn’t possibly like everyone, nor they me. As I’ve grown in the Fellowship, I’ve learned to love everyone just from listening to what they had to say. That person over there, or the one right here, may be the one God has chosen to give me the message I need for today. I must always remember to place principles above personalities.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

December 22~Language Of Letting Go

Good Things Coming

Do not worry about how the good that has been planned for you will come.

It will come.

Do not worry, obsess, think you have to control it, go out hunting for it, or tangle your mind trying to figure out how and when it will find you.

It will find you.

Surrender to your Higher Power each day. Trust your Higher Power. Then, stay peaceful. Trust and listen to yourself. That is how the good you want will come to you.

Your healing. Your joy. Your relationships. Your solutions. That job. That desired change. That opportunity. It will come to you—naturally, with ease, and in a host of ways.

That answer will come. The direction will come. The money. The idea. The energy. The creativity. The path will open itself to you. Trust that, for it has already been planned.

It is futile, a waste and drain of energy, to worry about how it will come. It is already there. You have it already. It is in place. You just cannot see it!

You will be brought to it, or it will be brought to you.

Today, I will relax and trust that the good I need will find me. Either through my leadings, or the leadings of others, all I want and need will come to me when the time is right.

[MandiH]

December 22~NA Just For Today

A New Way To Live

“When at the end of the road we find that we can no longer function as a human being, either with or
without drugs, we all face the same dilemma… Either go on as best we can to the bitter ends-jails,
institutions, or death-or find a new way to live.”
Basic Text pg. 84

What was the worst aspect of active addiction? For many of us, it wasn’t the chance that we might die
some day of our disease. The worst part was the living death we experienced every day, the never-ending meaninglessness of life. We felt like walking ghosts, not living, loving parts of the world around us.

In recovery, we’ve come to believe that we’re here for a reason: to love ourselves and to love others. In
working the Twelve Steps, we have learned to accept ourselves. With that self-acceptance has come selfrespect. We have seen that everything we do has an effect on others; we are a part of the lives of those around us, and they of ours. We’ve begun to trust other people and to acknowledge our responsibility to them.

In recovery, we’ve come back to life. We maintain our new lives by contributing to the welfare of others
and seeking each day to do that better - that’s where the Tenth, Eleventh, and Twelfth Steps come in. The
days of living like a ghost are past, but only so long as we actively seek to be healthy, loving, contributing
parts of our own lives and the lives of others around us.

Just for today: I have found a new way to live. Today, I will seek to serve others with love and to love
myself.

[MandiH]

December 22~Walk In Dry Places

Watching what we think

Personal Inventory.

It’s healthy for AA members to confess personal difficulties with destructive thinking. When we find
ourselves becoming too irritable or impatient, it’s important to admit this in meetings or one-on-one
discussions. Usually, just the admission of the problem helps solve it.

It’s only false pride that makes us think we should be “above” destructive thinking. As human beings,
we’ll be susceptible to human failings no matter how long we’ve been sober.

If we continue to watch what we think, we’ll also be able to head off very serious problem before they get out of control. Far from being a sign that we’re not working the program, the practice of weeding out our current faults is the Tenth Step in action.

Continuing to take personal inventory and admitting our wrongs are a safeguard against trouble.

Destructive thinking is no respecter of persons, and even as an older member, I could lapse into it today. I always have the Tenth Step, however, to get me back on track.

[MandiH]

December 23~Daily Reflections

RECOVERY, UNITY, SERVICE

Our Twelfth Step—carrying the message—is the basic service that AA’s Fellowship gives; this is our principal aim and the main reason for our existence.
THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 160

I thank God for those who came before me, those who told me not to forget the Three Legacies: Recovery, Unity and Service. In my home group, the Three Legacies were described on a sign which said: “You take a three-legged stool, try to balance it on only one leg, or two. Our Three Legacies must be kept intact. In Recovery, we get sober together; in Unity, we work together for the good of our Steps and Traditions; and through Service—we give away freely what has been given to us.”

One of the chief gifts of my life has been to know that I will have no message to give, unless I recover in unity with A.A. principles.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

December 23~Language Of Letting Go

Holiday Triggers

One year, when I was a child, my father got drunk and violent at Christmas. I had just unwrapped a present, a bottle of hand lotion, when he exploded in an alcoholic rage. Our Christmas was disrupted. It was terrible. It was frightening for the whole family. Now, thirty-five years later, whenever I smell hand lotion, I immediately feel all the feelings I did that Christmas: the fear, the disappointment, the heartache, the helplessness, and an instinctive desire to control.

— ANONYMOUS

There are many positive triggers that remind us of Christmas: snow, decorations, “Silent Night,” “Jingle Bells,” wrapped packages, a nativity scene, stockings hung on a fireplace. These “triggers” can evoke in us the warm, nostalgic feelings of the Christmas celebration.

There are other kinds of triggers, though, that may be less apparent and evoke different feelings and memories.

Our mind is like a powerful computer. It links sight, sound, smell, touch, and taste with feelings, thoughts, and memories. It links our senses—and we remember.

Sometimes the smallest, most innocuous incident can trigger memories. Not all our memories are pleasant, especially if we grew up in an alcoholic, dysfunctional setting.

We may not understand why we suddenly feel afraid, depressed, anxious. We may not understand what has triggered our codependent coping behaviors—the low self-worth, the need to control, the need to neglect ourselves. When that happens, we need to understand that some innocuous event may be triggering memories recorded deep within us.

If something, even something we don’t understand, triggers painful memories, we can pull ourselves back into the present by self-care: acknowledging our feelings, detaching, working the Steps, and affirming ourselves. We can take action to feel good. We can help ourselves feel better each Christmas. No matter what the past held, we can put it in perspective, and create a more pleasant holiday today.

Today, I will gently work through my memories of this holiday season. I will accept my feelings, even if I consider them different than what others are feeling this holiday. God, help me let go, heal from, and release the painful memories surrounding the holidays. Help me finish my business from the past, so I can create the holiday of my choice.

[MandiH]

December 23~Walk In Dry Places

AA goes the Distance

Fortitude

Few societies or organizations have better ways of measuring success than AA. Since we are friends as
well as recovering people, some of us get to know others fairly well over long periods of time. Even in a
large city, we meet people again and again, year after year.

We’ve come to think it very commonplace that some individuals have been sober ten years or more, and
that some members have been in the fellowship more than forty years.

The AA program does have staying power; it goes the distance for those who continue to follow it.

We should remind ourselves of this when we hear of new, faddish theories about alcoholism and
recovery. Most of the time, the results reported are very short-term. What we really need is recovery with
staying power, which we can find in the AA program.

Today’s sobriety can be another link in an endless chain of sobriety. AA will go the distance for me if I
take care of each day as it comes.

[MandiH]

December 23~Keep It Simple

We not only need to be willing to give, but also to be open to receiving from others.—from On Hope

Many of us took so much from others during our addiction that now we may not want to ask for anything.

We may be afraid to ask for help, so our needs go unmet. In fact, many of us would rather give than
receive. In recovery, we need to understand the difference between taking and receiving. Giving to others is important. So is receiving from others.

As we grow spiritually, we learn to accept gifts. The gift of sobriety teaches us this. We need to accept the gifts the world gives us without shame. We are entitled.

God loves us and will give us much if we’re willing to receive it.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be receptive to Your gifts. Help me see and believe that I’m entitled to all the happiness of the world.

Action for the Day: I’ll think of what a friend has given me. I’ll thank this friend.

[MandiH]

December 24~Daily Reflections

A “SANE AND HAPPY USEFULNESS”

We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done. These are the realities for us. We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 130

All the prayer and meditation in the world will not help me unless they are accompanied by action. Practicing the principles in all my affairs shows me the care that God takes in all parts of my life. God appears in my world when I move aside, and allow Him to step into it.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

December 24~Language Of Letting Go

Getting Through the Holidays

For some, the sights, signs, and smells of the holidays bring joy and a warm feeling. But, while others are joyously diving into the season, some of us are dipping into conflict, guilt, and a sense of loss.

We read articles on how to enjoy the holidays, we read about the Christmas blues, but many of us still can’t figure out how to get through the holiday season. We may not know what a joyous holiday would look and feel like.

Many of us are torn between what we want to do on the holiday, and what we feel we have to do. We may feel guilty because we don’t want to be with our families. We may feel a sense of loss because we don’t have the kind of family to be with that we want. Many of us, year after year, walk into the same dining room on the same holiday, expecting this year to be different. Then we leave, year after year, feeling let down, disappointed, and confused by it all.

Many of us have old, painful memories triggered by the holidays.

Many of us feel a great deal of relief when the holiday is ended.

One of the greatest gifts of recovery is learning that we are not alone. There are probably as many of us in conflict during the holidays than there are those who feel at peace. We’re learning, through trial and error, how to take care of ourselves a little better each holiday season.

Our first recovery task during the holidays is to accept ourselves, our situation, and our feelings about our situation. We accept our guilt, anger, and sense of loss. It’s all okay.

There is no right or perfect way to handle the holidays. Our strength can be found in doing the best we can, one year at a time.

This holiday season, I will give myself permission to take care of myself.

[MandiH]

December 25~Daily Reflections

AT PEACE WITH LIFE

Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee—Thy will (not mine) be done.”
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85

I read this passage each morning, to start off my day, because it is a continual reminder to “practice these principles in all my affairs.” When I keep God’s will at the forefront of my mind, I am able to do what I should be doing, and that puts me at peace with life, with myself and with God.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

December 25~Language Of Letting Go

The Holidays

Sometimes, the holidays are filled with the joy we associate with that time of year. The season flows. Magic is in the air.

Sometimes, the holidays can be difficult and lonely.

Here are some ideas I’ve learned through personal experience, and practice, to help us get through difficult holidays:

Deal with feelings, but try not to dwell unduly on them. Put the holidays in perspective: A holiday is one day out of 365. We can get through any 24-hour period.

Get through the day, but be aware that there may be a post-holiday backlash. Sometimes, if we use our survival behaviors to get through the day, the feelings will catch up to us the next day. Deal with them too. Get back on track as quickly as possible.

Find and cherish the love that’s available, even if it’s not exactly what we want. Is there someone we can give love to and receive love from? Recovering friends? Is there a family who would enjoy sharing their holiday with us? Don’t be a martyr; go. There may be those who would appreciate our offer to share our day with them.

We are not in the minority if we find ourselves experiencing a less-than-ideal holiday. How easy, but untrue, to tell ourselves the rest of the world is experiencing the perfect holiday, and we’re alone in conflict.

We can create our own holiday agenda. Buy yourself a present. Find someone to whom you can give. Unleash your loving, nurturing self and give in to the holiday spirit.

Maybe past holidays haven’t been terrific. Maybe this year wasn’t terrific. But next year can be better, and the next a little better. Work toward a better life—one that meets your needs. Before long, you’ll have it.

God, help me enjoy and cherish this holiday. If my situation is less than ideal, help me take what’s good and let go of the rest.

[MandiH]

December 26~Daily Reflections

ACCEPTING SUCCESS OR FAILURE

Furthermore, how shall we come to terms with seemingfailure or success? Can we now accept and adjust to either without despair or pride? Can we accept poverty, sickness, loneliness, and bereavement with courage and serenity? Can we steadfastly content ourselves with the humbler, yet sometimes more durable, satisfactions when the brighter, more glittering achievements are denied us?

TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 112
After I found A.A. and stopped drinking, it took a while before I understood why the First Step contained two parts: my powerlessness over alcohol and my life’s unmanageability.

In the same way, I believed for a long time that, in order to be in tune with the Twelve Steps, it was enough for me “to carry this message to alcoholics.” That was rushing things.

I was forgetting that there were a total of Twelve Steps and that the Twelfth Step also had more than one part.

Eventually I learned that it was necessary for me to “practice these principles” in all areas of my life. In working all the Steps thoroughly, I not only stay sober and help someone else to achieve sobriety, but also I transform my difficulty with living into a joy of living.

[MandiH]

Decmeber 26~Language Of Letting Go

Growth

Just as when we were children and grew out of favorite toys and clothes, we sometimes grow out of things as adults—people, jobs, homes. This can be confusing. We may wonder why someone or something that was so special and important to us last year doesn’t fit the same way in our life today. We may wonder why our feelings have changed.

When we were children, we may have tried to fit into an outgrown article of clothing. Now, as adults, we may go through a time of trying to force-fit attitudes that we have outgrown. We may need to do this to give ourselves time to realize the truth. What worked last year, what was so important and special to us in times past, doesn’t work anymore because we’ve changed. We’ve grown.

We can accept this as a valid and important part of recovery. We can let ourselves go through experimentation and grief as we struggle to make something fit, trying to figure out if indeed it no longer fits, and why. We can explore our feelings and thoughts around what has happened.

Then, we can put last year’s toys away and make room for the new.

Today, I will let last year’s toys be what they were: last year’s toys. I will remember them with fondness for the part they played in my life. Then, I will put them away and make room for the new.

[MandiH]

December 27~Daily Reflections

PROBLEM SOLVING

“Quite as important was the discovery that spiritual principles would solve all my problems.”
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 42

Through the recovery process described in the Big Book, I have come to realize that the same instructions that work on my alcoholism, work on much more. Whenever I am angry or frustrated, I consider the matter a manifestation of the main problem within me, alcoholism. As I “walk” through the Steps, my difficulty is usually dealt with long before I reach the Twelfth “suggestion,” and those difficulties that persist are remedied when I make an effort to carry the message to someone else. These principles do solve my problems! I have not encountered an exception, and I have been brought to a way of living which is satisfying and useful.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

[MandiH]

December 27~Language Of Letting Go

Near the Top

I know you’re tired. I know you feel overwhelmed. You may feel as though this crisis, this problem, this hard time will last forever.

It won’t. You are almost through.

You don’t just think it has been hard; it has been hard. You have been tested, tried, and retested on what you have learned.

Your beliefs and your faith have been tried in fire. You have believed, then doubted, then worked at believing some more. You have had to have faith even when you could not see or imagine what you were asked to believe. Others around you may have tried to convince you not to believe in what you were hoping you could believe.

You have had opposition. You have not gotten to this place with total support and joy. You have had to work hard, in spite of what was happening around you. Sometimes, what motivated you was anger; sometimes fear.

Things went wrong—more problems occurred than you anticipated. There were obstacles, frustrations, and annoyances en route. You did not plan on this being the way it would evolve. Much of this has been a surprise; some of it has not been at all what you desired.

Yet, it has been good. Part of you, the deepest part that knows truth, has sensed this all along, even when your head told you that things were out of whack and crazy, that there was no plan or purpose, that God had forgotten you.

So much has happened, and each incident—the most painful, the most troubling, the most surprising—has a connection. You are beginning to see and sense that.

You never dreamt things would happen this way, did you? But they did. Now you are learning the secret—they were meant to happen this way, and this way is good, better than what you expected.

You didn’t believe it would take this long, either—did you? But it did. You have learned patience.

You never thought you could have it, but now you know you do.

You have been led. Many were the moments when you thought you were forgotten, when you were convinced you had been abandoned. Now you know you have been guided.

Now things are coming into place. You are almost at the end of this phase, this difficult portion of the journey. The lesson is almost complete. You know—the lesson you fought, resisted, and insisted you could not learn. Yes, that one. You have almost mastered it.

You have been changed from the inside out. You have been moved to a different level, a higher level, a better level.

You have been climbing a mountain. It has not been easy, but mountain climbing is never easy. Now, you are near the top. A moment longer, and the victory shall be yours.

Steady your shoulders. Breathe deeply. Move forward in confidence and peace. The time is coming to relish and enjoy all which you have fought for. That time is drawing near, finally.

I know you have thought before that the time was drawing near, only to learn that it wasn’t. But now, the reward is coming. You know that too. You can feel it.

Your struggle has not been in vain. For every struggle on this journey, there is a climax, a resolution.

Peace, joy, abundant blessings, and reward are yours here on earth. Enjoy.

There will be more mountains, but now you know how to climb them. And you have learned the secret of what is at the top.

Today, I will accept where I am and continue pushing forward. If I am in the midst of a learning experience, I will allow myself to continue on with the faith that the day of mastery and reward will come. Help me, God, understand that despite my best efforts to live in peaceful serenity, there are times of mountain climbing. Help me stop creating chaos and crisis, and help me meet the challenges that will move me upward and forward.

[MandiH]

December 27~NA Just For Today

God Could Restore Us To Sanity

“The process of coming to believe restores us to sanity. The strength to move into action comes from this belief.”~Basic Text pg. 24

Now that we’ve finally admitted our insanity and seen examples of it in all its manifestations, we might be tempted to believe that we are doomed to repeat this behavior for the rest of our lives. Just as we thought that our active addiction was hopeless and we’d never get clean, we might now believe that our particular brand of insanity is hopeless.

Not so!

We know that we owe our freedom from active addiction to the grace of a loving God. If our
Higher Power can perform such a miracle as relieving our obsession to use drugs, surely this Power can also relieve our insanity in all its forms.

If we doubt this, all we have to do is think about the sanity that has already been restored to our lives.
Maybe we’ve gotten carried away with our credit cards, but sanity returns when we admit defeat and cut them all up. Perhaps we’ve been feeling lonely and want to go visit our old using buddies. Going to visit our sponsor instead is a sane act.

The insanity of our addiction recedes into the past as we begin experiencing moments of sanity in our
recovery. Our belief in a Power greater than ourselves grows as we begin to understand that even our brand of insanity is nothing in the face of this Power.

Just for today: I thank the God of my understanding for each sane act in my life, for I know they are
indications of my restoration to sanity.

[MandiH]

December 27~Keep It Simple

Reading is to the Mind, what exercise is to the body.

Good ideas are the seeds that start our growth. We hear things at meetings. We listen to our sponsor.
Maybe we listen to program tapes. And we read. Reading is special because we do it when we’re alone.

We read in quiet times, when we can think. We can read as fast or as slow as we want. We can mark
special words and come back to them again and again. We’ll figure things out in our way, but we need
help to get started. That’s why we read. It gives us good ideas to think about.

Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, speak to me through helpful readings and help me learn at my best pace.

Action for the Day: Reading is easier the more I do it. Today I’ll feel proud that I’ve read program ideas to
get my mind thinking in a healthy way.