Daily Reflections & Daily Readings

MandiH · December 27, 2024, 2:35pm

Today my guided message that I put out (I always write them the night before after asking my HP what I’m supposed to share) was about how bright and colorful our life can get if we remain open and willing to be teachable. It’s very much in line with todays reading.

Finally getting to that place where I was able to admit my life was unmanageable was a pretty big deal. I finally surrendered to the fact I clearly have no idea what I’m doing and I DON’T know best. I always thought I knew everything lmao! Turns out, the more I learn the more I know I know nothing. And this actually brings me to sanity and peace. I don’t need to know everything-my HP does. I just need to connect daily and ask for guidance for thy will to be done for the highest and greatest good for all, not my own.

I was guided to buy a book this week-it’s a Bible Study for Celebrate Recovery. I didn’t grow up in a religious household and I’ve tried to read the Bible many times and got nowhere but frustrated lol. My HP told me not to worry about the program or the differences…this is to get me to be able to read the bible in an understandable way and relate it to my recovery. My own language. This is to remain teachable. Do I think I’ll agree with everything? No. But do I want to throw the baby out with the bath water? No. My HP has lead me here for a reason and I’m trusting that today. And, I had a little down time on Christmas day and that’s when I began reading it. My HP later told me that wasn’t a coincidence.

We all have connection to things far bigger than ourselves if we just follow the guidance we are given and stay open and willing to learn and try new things. But first I had to surrender to the fact my life was unmanageable, that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity, and I had to make a decision to turn my will over to the care of god, as I understood him. And life is FAR better today, because I have opened up and followed AA’s guidance. For this, my program of recovery and my people-I am forever grateful.

MandiH · December 28, 2024, 3:25pm

December 28~Daily Reflections

SUIT UP AND SHOW UP

In A.A. we aim not only for sobriety - we try again
to become citizens of the world that we rejected, and of the world that once rejected us. This is the
ultimate demonstration toward which Twelfth Step work is the first but not the final step. ~AS BILL SEES IT, p. 21

The old line says, “Suit up and show up.” That action is so important that I like to think of it as my motto.
I can choose each day to suit up and show up, or not.

Showing up at meetings starts me toward feeling a part of that meeting, I can talk with newcomers, and I can share my experience; that’s what credibility, honesty, and courtesy really are. Suiting up and showing up are the concrete actions I take in my ongoing return to normal living.

MandiH · December 28, 2024, 3:26pm

December 28~Language Of Letting Go

Panic

Don’t panic!

If panic strikes, we do not have to allow it to control our behaviors. Behaviors controlled by panic tend to be self-defeating. No matter what the situation or circumstance, panic is usually not a good foundation. No matter what the situation or circumstance, we usually have at least a moment to breathe deeply and restore our serenity and peace.

We don’t have to do more than we can reasonably do—ever! We don’t have to do something we absolutely cannot do or cannot learn to do!

This program, this healthy way of life we are seeking, is built on a foundation of peace and quiet confidence—in ourselves, in our Higher Power, in the recovery process.

Do not panic. That takes us away from the path. Relax. Breathe deeply. Let peace flow through our body and mind. From this base, our Source shall supply the necessary resources.

Today, I will treat panic as a separate issue that needs immediate attention. I will refuse to allow panicky thoughts and feelings to motivate me. Instead, I will let peace and trust motivate my feelings, thoughts, and behaviors.

MandiH · December 28, 2024, 3:27pm

December 28~Walk In Dry Places

Rehearing Rejection

Fortitude

The possibility of rejection exists with almost everything we do, if we are free to choose. We might not like rejection, but we want the same freedom to reject others. As freely choosing people, we need to turn down ideas or proposals we don’t like.

One thing we should never do, however, is rehearse rejections before they occur. If we do this, we may
give up even before we have attempted what we hope to accomplish. In effect, we will be killing our
hopes even before others have a chance to review them. This is always a ticket to failure.

Rejection is really a feedback mechanism that reports information we ought to have. It tells us either to change our approach or to seek acceptance elsewhere. It is not evidence that we’re completely
unacceptable.

Our problem with any single rejection may be that it causes us to recall all the rejections we ever had. We
can learn to see any rejection as a normal event that can be beneficial if we accept it properly.

I’ll not let any fear or visualization of rejection keep me from actions I ought to take today. I am an
acceptable person, and there is a place for what I have to offer.

MandiH · December 30, 2024, 3:11am

December 29~Daily Reflections

THE JOY OF LIVING

. . . therefore the joy of good living is the theme of A.A.'s Twelfth Step.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 125

A.A. is a joyful program! Even so, I occasionally balk at taking the necessary steps to move ahead, and find myself resisting the very actions that could bring about the joy I want. I would not resist if those actions did not touch some vulnerable area of my life, an area that needs hope and fulfillment. Repeated exposure to joyfulness has a way of softening the hard, outer edges of my ego. Therein lies the power of joyfulness to help all members of A.A.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

MandiH · December 30, 2024, 3:11am

December 29~Language Of Letting Go

Moving On

Learn the art of acceptance. It’s a lot of grief.

— CODEPENDENT NO MORE

Sometimes, as part of taking care of ourselves, it becomes time to end certain relationships. Sometimes, it comes time to change the parameters of a particular relationship.

This is true in love, in friendships, with family, and on the job.

Endings and changes in relationships are not easy. But often, they are necessary.

Sometimes, we linger in relationships that are dead, out of fear of being alone or to postpone the inevitable grieving process that accompanies endings. Sometimes, we need to linger for a while, to prepare ourselves, to get strong and ready enough to handle the change.

If that is what we are doing, we can be gentle with ourselves. It is better to wait until that moment when it feels solid, clear, and consistent to act.

We will know. We will know. We can trust ourselves.

Knowing that a relationship is changing or is about to end is a difficult place to be in, especially when it is not yet time to act but we know the time is drawing near. It can be awkward and uncomfortable, as the lesson draws to a close. We may become impatient to put closure on it, but not yet feel empowered to do that. That’s okay. The time is not yet right. Something important is still happening. When the time is right, we can trust that it will happen. We will receive the power and the ability to do what we need to do.

Ending relationships or changing the boundaries of a particular relationship is not easy. It requires courage and faith. It requires a willingness on our part to take care of ourselves and, sometimes, to stand alone for a while.

Let go of fear. Understand that change is an important part of recovery. Love yourself enough to do what you need to do to take care of yourself, and find enough confidence to believe that you will love again.

We are never starting over. In recovery, we are moving forward in a perfectly planned progression of lessons. We will find ourselves with certain people—in love, family, friendships, and work—when we need to be with them. When the lesson has been mastered, we will move on. We will find ourselves in a new place, learning new lessons, with new people.

No, the lessons are not all painful. We will arrive at that place where we can learn, not from pain, but from joy and love.

Our needs will get met.

Today, I will accept where I am in my relationships, even if that place is awkward and uncomfortable. If I am in the midst of endings, I will face and accept my grief. God, help me trust that the path I am on has been perfectly and lovingly planned for me. Help me believe that my relationships are teaching me important lessons. Help me accept and be grateful for middles, endings, and new beginnings.

MandiH · December 31, 2024, 11:00am

December 31~Daily Reflections

DAILY RESOLUTIONS

The idea of “twenty-four-hour living” applies primarily to the emotional life of the individual. Emotionally speaking, we must not live in yesterday, nor in tomorrow.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 284

A New Year: 12 months, 52 weeks, 365 days, 8,760 hours, 525,600 minutes — a time to consider directions, goals, and actions. I must make some plans to live a normal life, but also I must live emotionally within a twenty-four-hour frame, for if I do, I don’t have to make New Year’s resolutions! I can make every day a New Year’s day! I can decide, “Today I will do this . . . Today I will do that.” Each day I can measure my life by trying to do a little better, by deciding to follow God’s will and by making an effort to put the principles of our A.A. program into action.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

MandiH · December 31, 2024, 11:01am

December 31~Language Of Letting Go

Affirming the Good

Fun becomes fun, love becomes love, life becomes worth living. And we become grateful.

— BEYOND CODEPENDENCY

Wait, and expect good things—for yourself and your loved ones.

When you wonder what is coming, tell yourself the best is coming, the very best life and love have to offer, the best God and His universe have to send. Then open your hands to receive it. Claim it, and it is yours.

See the best in your mind; envision what it will look like, what it will feel like. Focus, until you can see it clearly. Let your whole being, body and soul, enter into and hold onto the image for a moment.

Then, let it go. Come back into today, the present moment. Do not obsess. Do not become fearful. Become excited. Live today fully, expressing gratitude for all you have been, all you are, and all you will become.

Wait, and expect good things.

Today, when I think about the year ahead, I will focus on the good that is coming.

MandiH · January 2, 2025, 10:45am

I’ve been thinking about how to proceed with the daily readings. I’ve been praying and asking for guidance on it. So far my impression is to post just the AA Daily Reflections readings and to reflect on those out loud, in hopes of opening up conversation on them. This came to me last night so I’m starting today and will change that if guided to do so.

MandiH · January 2, 2025, 10:45am

January 2~Daily Reflections

FIRST, THE FOUNDATION

Is sobriety all that we can expect of a spiritual awakening? No, sobriety is only a bare beginning.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 8

Practicing the A.A. program is like building a house. First I had to pour a big, thick concrete slab on which to erect the house; that, to me, was the equivalent of stopping drinking. But it’s pretty uncomfortable living on a concrete slab, unprotected and exposed to the heat, cold, wind and rain. So I built a room on the slab by starting to practice the program. The first room was rickety because I wasn’t used to the work. But as time passed, as I practiced the program, I learned to build better rooms. The more I practiced, and the more I built, the more comfortable, and happy, was the home I now have to live in.

MandiH · January 2, 2025, 10:55am

I love this analogy. Getting sober was not enough for me. It truly was very uncomfortable, very much like being on that concrete pad. Sure, it was a foundation to be able to build on, but I had no tools or knowledge on how to build that up.

It was only when I was sober 2 years and actually surrendered to the program that life began to change. I was miserable, isolated and repeating the same mistakes even in sobriety. I didn’t know how to live, so I prayed and asked whoever was listening to show me the way and what I needed to do. The very next morning, the hand of AA reached out for me and I’m so glad I grabbed it. It was truly divinely guided synchronicity. My sponsor and I immediately began the work, and life really started to change.

I’ve been working the program almost 5 years now and I’ll be the first to admit, I’m not perfect and neither is my program work. I’ll never be able to recite the big book word for word, but I do work my program. I connect with my sponsor often. I connect with other alcoholics every single day. I continue to do the work and try to be of service the best I can. I carry the message, but also listen to others today. And I’m in a place I never dreamed I’d be.

I’m grateful for this program that has given me the tools I need to build my new life upon because today life is better than it’s ever been. I’m an extremely grateful recovering alcoholic.

MandiH · January 3, 2025, 12:12pm

January 3~Daily Reflections

POWERLESS

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 21

It is no coincidence that the very first Step mentions powerlessness: An admission of personal powerlessness over alcohol is a cornerstone of the foundation of recovery. I’ve learned that I do not have the power and control I once thought I had. I am powerless over what people think about me. I am powerless over having just missed the bus. I am powerless over how other people work (or don’t work) the Steps. But I’ve also learned I am not powerless over some things. I am not powerless over my attitudes. I am not powerless over negativity. I am not powerless over assuming responsibility for my own recovery. I have the power to exert a positive influence on myself, my loved ones, and the world in which I live.

From the book Daily Reflections.
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

MandiH · January 3, 2025, 12:19pm

I realllllly struggled with the idea of being powerless over alcohol when I first heard that notion. I thought I had control. That no beverage could end up controlling me. That I knew how to beat this without admitting that. But, the truth is, I am completely and utterly powerless once I take that first drink.

It took me a long time to surrender to this idea. Yet, once I did, that’s when TRUE recovery began. To me, sobriety and recovery are VERY different things. I was sober, but changed nothing. I began true recovery once I admitted I was powerless over alcohol, if I take a drink the drink takes me. I finally worked my program. I simply can not control my drinking or moderate it. I had to give it up to my HP and surrender. I was powerless and my life had become unmanageable. But, I do still have power over other things, as it mentions in the reading. However, for me, having a power greater than myself standing beside me always, is the greatest blessing this program has brought me.

Have a great day everyone!

MandiH · January 4, 2025, 2:17pm

January 4~Daily Reflections

BEGIN WHERE YOU ARE

We feel that elimination of our drinking is but a beginning. A much more important demonstration of our principles lies before us in our respective homes, occupations and affairs.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 19

It’s usually pretty easy for me to be pleasant to the people in an A.A. setting. While I’m working to stay sober, I’m celebrating with my fellow A.A.s our common release from the hell of drinking. It’s often not so hard to spread glad tidings to my old and new friends in the program.

At home or at work, though, it can be a different story. It is in situations arising in both of those areas that the little day-to-day frustrations are most evident, and where it can be tough to smile or reach out with a kind word or an attentive ear. It’s outside of the A.A. rooms that I face the real test of the effectiveness of my walk through A.A.'s Twelve Steps.

MandiH · January 4, 2025, 2:37pm

This stood out to me today. For me, it’s easier to practice the principals with others in the program. The challenge, and key, is practicing the principals in ALL of my affairs. I get to take what I’ve learned and gained in this program with me everywhere I go. At home. At work. In the grocery store. On the car ride there. Etc. When I struggle, I call my sponsor.

This week we got a call, asking if we could house his son, girlfriend and 9 year old daughter if needed. Where they are is quite toxic. But this immediately filled me with fear. I work from home with my day job and also with my spiritual business at night. My dog is super anxious and having 3 new people here all the time makes me nervous. And life would change in a big way.

Instead of reacting out loud, I practiced the pause. I called my sponsor. I prayed and talked to my HP to gain a higher perspective. To me, this was practicing the principals in all of my affairs. I didn’t automatically react out of my fear. I stoeed back, practiced the pause and worked my recovery. I did not make a situation that was already hard enough on others worse by adding my ego in it or making it all about me. I was able to find my faith in this and know that whatever happens will be for the best, even if it’s challenging for a while. And I was able to talk to only those I needed to about it instead of everyone like I used to. I didn’t make a problem worse, instead I found solutions and acceptance. Reading that portion in the big book helped GREATLY!

I am grateful for my program of recovery and for the new life I’ve been given the opportunity to live today.

MandiH · January 5, 2025, 1:47pm

January 5~Daily Reflections

TOTAL ACCEPTANCE

He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 152

Only an alcoholic can understand the exact meaning of a statement like this one. The double standard that held me captive as an active alcoholic also filled me with terror and confusion: “If I don’t get a drink I’m going to die,” competed with “If I continue drinking it’s going to kill me.” Both compulsive thoughts pushed me ever closer to the bottom. That bottom produced a total acceptance of my alcoholism—with no reservations whatsoever—and one that was absolutely essential for my recovery. It was a dilemma unlike anything I had ever faced, but as I found out later on, a necessary one if I was to succeed in this program.

MandiH · January 5, 2025, 8:52pm

I’ve been reflecting on this writing today.

The first thing it made me think of was a conversation I had with my sponsor this week about sugar. I told her that a friend sent me something and it talked about treating it like a drug or alcohol and just fully abstaining. I said I just can’t imagine NEVER having it again…which was the same with alcohol and drugs. I couldn’t imagine life with them as I knew it would kill me too but I also couldn’t picture my life without them.

“That bottom produced a total acceptance of my alcoholism-with no reservations whatsoever”.

Yup. Sometimes what we struggle to let go of is actually what we need to surrender to and let go of the most in life.

MandiH · January 6, 2025, 12:42pm

January 6~Daily Reflections

THE VICTORY OF SURRENDER

We perceive that only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful lives may be built.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 21

When alcohol influenced every facet of my life, when bottles became the symbol of all my self indulgence and permissiveness, when I came to realize that, by myself, I could do nothing to overcome the power of alcohol, I realized I had no recourse except surrender. In surrender I found victory—victory over my selfish self-indulgence, victory over my stubborn resistance to life as it was given to me. When I stopped fighting anybody or anything, I started on the path to sobriety, serenity and peace.

MandiH · January 6, 2025, 12:50pm

For me, surrendering, REALLY surrendering was the key. But I had to have that gift of desperation first. It was only upon defeat could I find a new way into victory. By allowing myself to open up and be ALL in on my program. No matter how strange or foreign something seemed to me in this program, I finally knew I needed to do what worked for others. For different results, I needed to take drastically different actions. I had to listen. To take the action I was being told to take by my sponsor and this program. But none of it was possible without first fully following the first 3 steps:

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him

I’m grateful for that gift of utter defeat and desperation. This is what finally allowed me to see I don’t know best and I needed that to completely change my life for the better.

MandiH · January 7, 2025, 2:32pm

January 7~Daily Reflections

AT THE TURNING POINT

Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 59

Every day I stand at turning points. My thoughts and actions can propel me toward growth or turn me down the road to old habits and to booze. Sometimes turning points are beginnings, as when I decide to start praising, instead of condemning someone. Or when I begin to ask for help instead of going it alone. At other times turning points are endings, such as when I see clearly the need to stop festering resentments or crippling self-seeking. Many shortcomings tempt me daily; therefore, I also have daily opportunities to become aware of them. In one form or another, many of my character defects appear daily: self-condemnation, anger, running away, being prideful, wanting to get even, or acting out of grandiosity.

Attempting half measures to eliminate these defects merely paralyzes my efforts to change. It is only when I ask God for help, with complete abandon, that I become willing—and able—to change.