I’m looking for suggestions. Today is day one again for probably 999th time. I keep getting from 2 weeks to a month sober. I’m feeling great, feeling strong, feeling untouchable. Then all of a sudden Crash and burn and I’m back to drinking. I’m not sure why or how my ability to say no can be so strong one day then non existent another. My biggest trigger is getting off of work or I’m done with whatever I’m doing for that day. I’ve never been a day drinker because I’m way too busy working or getting projects done. But as soon as my responsibilities are completed all I want to do is drink beer. And once I pop a top I don’t want to stop until I run out of beer. And as soon as I run out of beer all I want to do is go to sleep.
I know people say I should go to a meetings but unfortunately I’m in a career that takes me away from home very often and Im never really sure where I’m going until the day prior. So finding a meeting is much harder then finding a bar. Especially when I’m in a city I do not know.
I’m wondering if anyone else has gone through this and how you handled it.
I’m just about to turn 38 and I have a new baby boy that I want to be around for. He’s amazing and I want to be the responsibile and loving father for him that I never had.
Thank you