I saw that in a few places some of you recommended Easypeasy method. I started listen to audiobook.
Anyone finish the book? It’s worth reading? What are your opinions? I ask because I didn’t find much information about the author, it looks like this guy also suffered from PMO addiction.
The effort to overcome PMO / lust / porn / masturbation addiction is significant. The addiction seeps into life and eventually (for me) I realized it had totally turned my feelings and expectations inside out. I am still fixing the problems it created and I will be healing from these problems for a long time. It is messed up.
@KevinesKay has posted many times about the Easy Peasy method for finding freedom from porn. He will be able to give you insight into that. Here is a recent post of his about it:
Personally I have not listened to or read Easy Peasy so I cannot give any opinion about it myself, but Kevin is a knowledgeable source and if it is working for him I am sure it will be helpful!
I wanted to start yesterday, but at afternoon I fell… but I already got my first 24h of being “sober”.
I reached the fragment with brainwashing and giving value to PMO. Great idea, I really like it!
Generally I started my quiting long time ago, but I was totally alone in my journey. I see that this community is very lively, so I hope it will help to find some support in moments of doubt.
I write my own journal to detect false/stupid believes, but I see many people describe their own story here. What is the reason behind it? It helps to understand your own problem or it is just courtesy toward other people?
For me, checking in with other humans is valuable because I need empathy. I need to be seen by people who understand me, and no one understands my recovery better than other people in recovery from addiction. It helps me to feel seen and understood.
Oh, this is also a good topic - seeing that other people get better gives hope - but I meant category “your story” - where people write: I’m NN, my problem is XYZ, and sometimes they add some background to that.
It looks like introducing yourself on AA meeting, but with providing more info.
After I read Easy Peasy, I followed up with Allen Carr’s books, The Easy Way to Stop Smoking and The Easy Way to Control Alcohol
As a former member of SAA and SLAA, and a chronic relapser, these books helped me to uncover a major root problem that I had not yet identified.
It was the fact that I was placing value on my DOC and felt that I was making a sacrifice by choosing to quit. Allen Carr refers to any method that requires making a sacrifice as a willpower method. When I finally understood the fact that my DOC, porn and lust, have no value, it became a lot easier to say no.
Let me reiterate that the problem of brainwashing was just one of my problems. But I also had other problems. And until I exposed and addressed each and every one of those problems, they were going to continue to subconsciously work against me, undermining and sabotaging my conscious efforts to quit PMO
In my case I “devaulated” videos long ago, blocked them successfully, but I had/have problem with MO.
Definitely I placed value in “O”, but it’s hard to say where is the root of the problem. For now I have 5 clean days and these are truly clean - in the past I “cheat” very often - looked at “soft” photos as alternatiive to get my body “ready”. Sometimes I only “checked” if my body response for touch.
Do other people also experience that their problem “evolve”, so the reason changes? @KevinesKay You experienced this, is it true?
In my case the reason were:
firstly curiosity, pleasure, imitating the fashion/magazine models (rather not vain, but seeking arousal)
then: using MO/PMO to cope with stress, low self-esteem (I’m ACoA)
loneliness, lack of love/touch, maybe vain again? I’m in shape and sometimes I had thoughts about having photos/being painted, just showing my body to ladies. But lack of love is located deeper and that is the main reason now.
I think nobody in my life pointed out that by avoiding PMO I loose nothing. At least that’s what I remember from hearing here and there. In the past it always looked like I sacrifice something.
After reading a book I developed new assumptions or beliefs? Well, definitely I don’t care anymore if I have erection seeing photo, scene in movie or in the morning. And I don’t try to get it to check if body works. I just left it to the nature. I assume my mind will “heal” the body and will work quite good in the right situation. (in the past I experienced fear of impotency and this lead to other slips…).
I think I unconsciously treated “O” as the biggest and most important thing in life, after reading a book it is not so important.
I probably read 50-75% of it before I felt like it was just not for me. I don’t think it goes deep enough.
When I learned there’s a mythological God called Priapus (literally God of giant erections) I immediately felt like I was an ancient person, worshipping an ancient God, acting primitively and essentially spellbound or hypnotized, or some other religious word. I felt like I needed to commit apostasy and leave this weird cult of voyeurism, cuckoldry, and simping (for lack of a better word). That’s what made it click for me, but it’s not for everybody.
It was definitely a sacrifice, and also difficult in the beginning, but now I’m pretty much coasting and working on other things in life. If my life collapsed in several different dimensions for an extended period of time, I bet I would probably find it a lot harder to resist, although I do know now what’s possible and what generally works.