Hey buddy. Today I ate two microwave burritos and a salisbury steak frozen dinner. Nothing healthy in me today. I’m trying to judge my food less in terms of good or bad and more in terms of what my body is asking me for. I felt salty today and got my fill.
I am often in a calorie deficit these days due to time, summer heat and overall energy. When I’m feeling down it is hard to feel like I deserve food. When I am happy I indulge. When I am deeply unhappy I binge.
Hang in there. You are heard. 🩷
Today I ate a full size meal. and it was healthy, so I was happy.
Now I feel sick and regret eating…
I want to be ok with food. Not avoid it or binge. I want to eat healthy. I want it to be inherent and not a task I have to think through…
.just another thing to work on I guess.
These things take time. Give your feelings a place to be, let them go at some point, take care of yourself. You’ll get there. Hugs 
Yesterday I didn’t eat. There was too much going on, too much stress.
Today I went applying for jobs, and got a kombucha, and when I came home realized I got food for everyone but me, and air fried 12 chicken nuggets.
12 is a lot and it took me a while to eat them. But I told myself since I didn’t eat anything else today or yesterday, I should have more for protein.
Feeling full… Which comes with a whole other set of feelings
Shame, guilt, sadness, etc.
But it’ll pass and it’ll be ok
Tomorrow I work at 430 am so I’m attempting an early bed time. We will see…
12 chicken nuggets is around 600 calories according to google. You could eat double that and still be on a pretty strict ‘diet’. You don’t need to feel guilty. It is not too much food for anyone. What it doesn’t have is fibre and many other nutrients. Focus on what you need to add to your diet.
It felt like a lot because it was 3 servings on the package, and it made me feel too full. Probably since I forgot to eat the day before, and it was an all meat no veggies meal. I have always been so careful to include vegetables and a carbohydrate in my (at least) one meal a day, but have started messing it up. Today I will focus on nutrition
Today I had this drink with a surprising amount of sugar,
And half a turkey provolone sandwich
Now I need a nap and I’ll find some veggies to eat when I wake up 
Edit: well it’s back to kids size plates, but this is one of the teen made dinners. The parameters were 1 protein, 2 veggies, and a carbohydrate.
Final result is bacon,
salad with peppers, tomato, cucumber, olives, and croutons,
And macaroni with Velveeta
I’m happy to see you eating more vegetables. By the way, what are your disordered eating goals? And food related goals in general?
I really just want to eat without thinking about it. Having enough nutrients.
I had gotten to a point where I almost wasn’t thinking about the food I was eating, but then the doctor told me i was sick and needed to lose weight and i fell off the cliff and didn’t eat at all for a few days, blaming it on depression, and then counting calories, and then giving myself a goal of under 1000, because it was “better” than “when I was restricting” and have been fighting to climb out of that thinking since.
I think the full sized plate on Sunday was too ambitious, but I shouldn’t have skipped eating Monday and most of Tuesday as a result… And then I should have had more variety in the food choices. Chicken nuggets are food in the house for the kids. I shouldn’t have even been eating it. And then I felt sick the rest of the night. Even when I left for work this morning… So today i have been trying to have healthy options that include all of the food groups… no fruit so far… But I don’t really feel like going back out to the grocery store, so I might thaw some frozen fruit later
Edit: my bowl of still semi frozen fruit
If you have a microwave, you can microwave the frozen fruit. To whatever stage of unfrozen you want it, with the hot weather it’s nice to have it still partially frozen sometimes.
I’m proud of you for what you’re doing. You’re thinking about it in a constructive way. At some point, it will end up being second nature.
Also how you’re teaching your children.
With the CHF it’s probably important for you to pay attention to the sodium. I’d say of all your dietary concerns that might be the most important. Remembering, too, that too little can be just as bad as too much. We all need some salt. Big hugs.
Here to say…
I made food to eat today at work, then decided against it.
Wanted to eat, but something is stopping me.
I went to the grocery store and bought some tuna to put on some seaweed pieces I have…but
I just don’t have any desire to eat. It feels like a chore.
I just want to sleep.
Work is taking all of my mental and physical energy.
I am not sure if my not eating or not wanting to eat is from physical illness or mental illness at this point.
Just wanted to vent. Sorry for the rambling 
Forced the issue and ate a pack of tuna with a pack of seaweed bites. And 3 mini quesadillas on almond flour gluten free tortillas.
Guess it’s good. Now I can go to sleep 
Glad you did get to eat something. 
The stomach does shrink after a while of not eating and it unfortunately does feel.like a chore to eat but you gotta re learn eating in a sense.
After a while the body starts craving food and feeling hungry in its own.
Hope you were able to get a good night’s sleep 
Hey friend, I get this is really tough on you this whole eating situation thing. I’m glad to hear you managed to eat something yesterday, that is a win. Also when sick our bodies often turn down our appetite and we don’t want to eat that much. But eating something is realy important.
I’m with @JazzyS on the shrinking stomach. Your systems - body, mind, heart - get used to our habits, and that does not always feel good.
Is there a way for you to have some stuff around you, you could nibble on through the day? If you do not feel like eating, and feel uncomfortable about it, nibbling on whatever sometimes helps.
Also giving yourself permission to eat anything and everything without judging yourself too much is really better than not eating.
Sending hugs
I ate at Panera today.
Half Greek salad and cup of tomato soup.
There were croutons and a piece of bread included. And I ate it too.
Shouldn’t have. Because I’m supposed to avoid gluten.
I just wanted to feel “normal”
But eating what I know I shouldn’t isn’t good. So again I feel guilt.
It’s all in my head. I just have to get over it.
One more day at a time
Big hugs … glad you ate something Did you have anything bad happen from eating the gluten?
Scorpion
hi everyone!! I’m glad you made this thread, I want to share a win!!
Today I went and made gingerbread houses with my family. Food items like candy with a lot of sugar are still scary to me, but I not only had so much fun building the house with them, I also ate what I wanted to and didn’t restrict. Really proud of myself today, and proud of all of you too!
Welcome to the thread, @norabora! I hope you find the support you need here! 
Here i am again.
I am dealing with some health issues (not feeling like discussing for now) that are causing me to hold on to fluid and swell and gain weight.
I have taken batteries back out of my scale because well…i do become obsessive
Its so hard for me to commit to eating daily when i see and feel my weight going up.
On the flip side i could binge and say fuck it i cant help but gain weight so i should eat.
I hear myself. Everything about food is disordered.
I’m sorry Renee. It is hard when our bodies start acting up and misbehaving. We have to remember that food is not the enemy. Somewhere along the lines we’ve been taught that food =weight. Food is nourishment and necessary for us to be healthy. We have to work on that rewiring again. Baby steps with small snacks. It’s not easy but necessary for us to heal.
Smart to remove the batteries. Weight is an issue all our lives and it’s harder to deal with the older we get. Don’t let the scale rule your health.
Hope you are able to work out your health issues and start feeling like yourself again 
