24 days sober today but feeling a bit meh 
I don’t really want a drink but I’m feeling hard done by that I can never have one again and I’ll be missing out in the future. I know it’s bollocks and my idea of “fun” turns into a living nightmare but I can’t shake it off. Talk some sense into me please!
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You are totally missing out on
- throwing up
- headaches
- nausea
- shame
- guilt
- blackouts
- loss of control
- pain
- that great feeling of coming to next day
- the taste in your mouth on the next day
- losing all the respect you are having for yourself
What else have I forgotten?
But you know what? You are only missing out on all that TODAY. You can have it all back tomorrow, if you just pick up this one drink.
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Don’t forget all the cash so that you can feel that way…
Perhaps that money on a new jacket or towards a trip would be more fun.
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Think how you’re going to feel in the morning waking up with a fresh head, thankful you didn’t have a drink the night before.
I used to say to myself “it’ll be a shame if I can’t have a drink ever again” and it was that mantra that kept me on the booze for far too long. I no longer think it’s a ‘shame’ to not drink again, as the benefits of not drinking far outweigh the drinking by an immeasurable number.
Don’t beat yourself up, you’re not missing out.
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Thanks everyone, I’m definitely not going to drink, just needed a kick up the bum 
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This is an example of the habitual brain working against us and our inner healthy values.
I recommend reading Atomic Habits
You got this Sarah 
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Dont worry about forever…that thinking is your addict brain convincing you to give up now.
Keep fighting. It gets better if you keep working on a recovery.
Early on in my journey i didnt know how to have fun sober. Its something to be curious about. Try new things. Have fun with your new found freedom
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And well done on 24 days
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ah man i do hate that addict brain of ours. so much of our happiness and fun times is tied into drinking when in reality all we are doing is willingly poisoning ourselves and living in despair.
24 days Sarah is absolutely fantastic! Just focus on today and not drinking for today. I try not to focus on that word “forever” It can be very daunting and when i hear it the obnoxious child in me comes out in full tantrum mode.
I relied on the games on my phone when i ran out of things to keep me busy. Also this site was super helpful when i needed a boost or distractions.
Here for you friend - keep pushing yourself forward 
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Just when you think you’re missing out, remember that the alternatives are delicious (and can be super healthy for you) AND so much less of a hassle!!
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Eventually you’ll get to the point where never having one again seems like the greatest idea on earth. You’ll realize how many people don’t drink at all. That your choice of beverage is not really that important.
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Enough good things said but would like to give you a compliment! You opened up and vent about your feelings. In that way you asked for help and got it. That sure iS recovery!
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You know what, I used to feel the same exact way. I was like, why bother going out to dinner, or go on vacation, a cruise, a party, networking event etc. The one that hit me the hardest was the thought of going on a cruise without that unlimited drink pass.
As you progress in your journey, those thoughts will fade and eventually turn into looking forward to all the things you did before, and drinking won’t be on your mind.
It took me many tries, but I have had zero urge to drink for over three years now. I used to wish I could be normal. We are normal, ingesting poison is not normal.
Is there a hobby that you love but could never afford? Maybe calculate what you were spending on alcohol and put that money towards something you love.
I’m glad you’re here and that you are honestly sharing your journey with us.
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Well done on the 24 hours . I know how days can be like that and its a challenge sometimes. I think mostly about my time and how i dont wanna give it back to my aa group and start allover .i get the suck it buttercup talk sometimes .it sucks but its the kick i need somedays lol
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I think its normal to have those thoughts i know i did early on but for now i agree with trying not to look to far ahead, i feel like eventually the positives of sobriety outweigh any feelings of missing out…i think maybe your mindset about drinking needs a change…i found Allen Carrs easy way to stop drinking really helped me with that missing out feeling. Your doing great Sarah sending love and hugs 
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Damn cruises haha. Thats what actually broke my sobriety the last time. 5 year anniversary, 1st cruise, husband wanted a drink pass, couldnt get just one. Was down hill from there.
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Sarah, you’re doing so so great. 24 days is an awesome achievement and you should be so proud of yourself. I think most addicts get that fear of missing out in early sobriety. You’re building something new and don’t know how to enjoy life without the never-ending cycle of relief from drinking followed by sorrow and misery. You’re probably romanticising the idea of enjoying a glass of wine as most of the pain and shame from your last black-out dissipated.
For me, I was holding on to and romanticizing this one truly amazing memory. A few years ago back when I was single and generally a hot mess I took myself on a solo holiday to the Canary islands. While there, I booked this half-day yacht package where the staff took us on a boat trip around the island, served us prosecco (or whatever people wanted to drink), let us drive (yeah, actually drive) a speed boat, before feeding us lunch and taking us back. IT WAS AMAZING!!
For years I held that memory of me sipping prosecco on a boat in the back of my mind. As much as I knew that drugs and alcohol and the constand stream of meltdowns were ruining my life, marriage, relationships and slowly killing me, I just couldn’t let go of ‘prosecco on a yacht.’
When I finally got sober for good and read several quit lit books, specifically Annie Grace’s book, something clicked in my head! My memory of that great day wasn’t about alcohol. It’s not ‘prosecco on a yacht,’ it’s the fucking boat itself and the stunning views. I didn’t enjoy that trip because I was drinking. I enjoyed it because it was something cool I treated myself to.
What’s your ‘prosecco on a yacht’ story? Was it the alcohol you enjoyed or was it the event itself or getting to spend quality time with the people in your life?
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I love this Amy, i often sit and wonder if all the times id had a great time at parties,out drinking…holidays would have been any less great had drinking not been involved and i think the answer is no… its just that the alcohol was kinda just there and not really even thought about at the time it was just kinda expected…id even go as far now as saying itd have been better without it because sober your actually present for stuff and can fully experience things, its a big fat lie that you cant have fun without alcohol
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I echo what @Starlight14 said. Love this. It’s so true. Maybe this should be its own thread ?!
My yacht / Prosecco moment was having a bottle of blush as part of a three course meal on a castle terrace overlooking Lake Bled in Slovenia for our wedding anniversary. And then a rainbow appeared. So special. The blush certainly didn’t ’make it’ X
Ps - sorry for crashing your thread with my own nostalgia @Blondie75 
X
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Oh yes! This! That “shiny memory” - but when you really think about it and put it into perspective, the alcohol played zero role - thank you!!
Mine would be my wedding - the toasts and happiness and dancing…but when I really think about it, I probably didn’t even drink a full glass bc I kept setting them down and they would disappear…which is probably why it went so well!! Ha
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