Feeling ashamed after relapse

Relapses
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After a month and 18 days i relapsed…i thought i can be better than that. That i can be stronger but i failed again. I kind of feel ashamed becouse i was so happy to see that first month…and now i lost my progress

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Sorry to hear about your relapse. It sucks. I’ve been there. It is really discouraging :frowning_face:

This might be a signal to make some changes. For me I found my relapses happened because I built my “house” (sobriety) out of cards, with no foundation and no strength for the unexpected events of my life.

I reached out to an outpatient detox to start with, and after that I joined a twelve-step group, which I still attend. There is a list of groups here: Resources for our recovery

It is possible. It takes changes and learning but it is possible.

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Shame is a dreadful emotion. It’s normal to feel that way after a relapse. I’ve unfortunately have had many. I learned over time that as the alcohol left my system, the shame would follow shortly after. It sucks to ride it out, but it will go away. Take a look at how you were feeling in the days leading up to the relapse.

For me, I feel like the relapse starts way before I pick up the bottle. It starts when I start bargaining with myself about drinking. I start manipulating myself into having just one drink, then I give myself permission for more and more and more. So as soon as my mind starts thinking:

  • why can’t I just drink like other people
  • I just want to be normal
  • I’ve been sober a while now, I could definitely handle
    drinking now
  • I really think I got it out of my system. It won’t get out
    of hand this time.

Or just any thoughts around it. That was my blaring signal and I never realized it until I finally got sober. So really think about what was going through your head as it might give you answers. I would totally suggest journaling too. I just do talk to text which is mildly infuriating lol, but it’s quick and easy.

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Maybe try a meeting might help wish you well

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:100:% true

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Yes, exactly! That’s what I was trying to say. Brain injuries are fun, I sure babble on and on lol

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Remember that feeling of shame next time an urge to use pops up! In other words, take a negative and turn it into a positive!

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You didn’t lose your progress man. Just try again, relapse is a part of a lot of recovering people’s story. Not a big deal if you don’t let it be a big deal