This is so lovely and wisdom message 
Thank you!
I also started drinking between 15-16 yo but I am fortunate because I stopped almost year ago just after I became 31. I was also looking for the person I used to be before drinking. But the too young lady just grew up and now here I was - facing totally new personality. Person who I didn’t know. Somebody I got to created from base. So my life became to be exploring the world around me at the first point and then my own self afterwards as I am no longer the 16 yo girl who I was when I started to drink. I am a woman now. And I feel like a woman for the first time because as long as I drank I just got stuck in the young teen girl mind set. But being woman and face feelings brings responsibilities which I just drank away for whole my previous life. But it’s ok, because the benefits gained are just awesome and it worth to learn how to manage the anxiety. It is part of the real life
It sounds like you are doing some hard thinking about yourself @Jana1988, that is a good thing!! Happy for you!!
Hi guys, having taken everyone’s advice/perspective/knowledge, I began to dig a little deeper to find WTF is wrong with me. All this led me to the knowledge that I have EVERY SINGLE TRAIT, of someone with codepency issues. I never even knew there was a name for it!! Today, I feel relieved that I now know there is help available for me, and that I am not loosing my mind. I cannot thank this community enough for always reaching out to help others. (I also checked the codepency thread on here, so that has been great) Thank You
So happy to read this! Look at you go, making progress and shit!! hug
LOL. All this time I have been the only person that is standing in my way of happiness. To have this knowledge has somewhat lit a spark in me. Alcohol was a good way of numbing the pain and trauma from the past, but I can hide no more. My 14 months of soberity has given me the back bone to face who I really am.