Folks I just wanted to say thank you to all of you on hereā¦ I stepped away for a couple weeks from the TS community because I felt like I was spending too much time on me and not enough time being productive in areas where I started to lackā¦ Iām not using again but honestly Iām struggling not just to not use but to not ever let myself sink into sadness and stay there for too longā¦ Iāve been there and I know as well as many, maybe all of you do what that sadness and self pity leads toā¦ Primarily I feel Iām more of a giver but sometimes I also know that I take more than I shouldā¦ I wonāt ask for helpā¦ But just for tonightā¦ Iām gonna gladly take it because I need itā¦ I will beat this and give back on a brighter dayā¦ Thatās a promiseā¦ 
Indeed they probably arenātā¦ 
Iāve been around since before they built the 
ā¦ 
Just noticed your pic!!! 
Absolutely trueā¦
gotta throw those bots off my scent! Ah, who am I foolingā¦no one wants my identity.
Mine neither palā¦
Figured if I need an alias none better than this guyā¦ So here it is a few decades and maybe a half later and I resurrected him because I missed himā¦ However, if heās playing me or Iām playing him Iāve gotta change his gender to female so I am more comfortable because Iām still a womanā¦ 
Itās 2020 thatās legalā¦ 
I wouldnāt really expect anybody besides Jesus or Lady Gaga to get that and Iām ok with thatā¦ I thought it would be wrong to upload a pic of my first choice of a HP because I donāt know his face or to impersonate a real person but I donāt think Alf will mindā¦ After reading through this all again from her perspective I canāt help but !!!
But I do wonder how many of these people are really happy.
How many just post because it is the thing to do.
Iāve always been of the get it out there camp.
Hey! Here I am and Iām an alcoholic.
But everyone deals with this journey differently.
I have chosen honesty as my greatest tool in sobriety. Its working for me.
If honesty is your starting point shame has no place it was a release to call up my familymembers and tell them that I had an issue.
My grams 83 years old was nothing butt proud that I did it and that I told her. She had no idea.
Thatās just an example.
Good luck on your journey! Shame is not needed since we are just soldiers fighting for our lives when so many addicts are oblivious to what they have. 
You are absolutely correctā¦ What you said before about being better than you were beforeā¦ I completely get that!!! Prior to using drugās for a little while I was the kind of idiot that would map quest directions from their place to mine if threatened in any way, even if I knew for certain I could get hurt (which would typically be always because Iām nothing to fear )ā¦ When hurt or faced with danger I never stopped to even think about my actions and how they could effect not just my life and safety but the lives of others that I care about until laterā¦ This entire experience has changed me in that way for the betterā¦ Thereās still much work that I gotta do in this areaā¦ Thanks Man
Is this a bio story or metaforical 
Well I want to say that it is all bio on my part but I can easily understand where it would appear to be metaphorical to anyone elseā¦ Clinically it would just be classified as mental illnessā¦ 
Hard part is probably figuring out whoās rightā¦ 
Whoot Alf turned female again. This is fraud!!
Lesson for today:
Never trust a being from melmak.
Absolute factsā¦
Here 
ā¦
You should be proud of being brave enough to step into the light and be proud of who you are and where u r going!
I ment to sayā¦ All power to you 
but you know my standing on this matter
