I don’t know if it helps and I don’t have any cute animals, but my daughter made these huge easter eggs and she said you can pick one 
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Gosh Emm that got me right in the feels 
thank you…im very hard on myself sometimes and totally hear you on the getting it all done today front…im working on patience but its certainly not my forte…on the money front i know im making great strides and i knew it would be uncomfortable but just never having any extra in my pocket is draining…i often explain to my daughter when shes asks for things how we cant afford it etc so she learns about money but i also feel like im letting her down sometimes by not being able to take her away on holidays etc…ok im rambling now…i hate how this ugly feeling of not being good enough literally punches me in the guts sometimes
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Wow how wonderful they are please tell her this!! I will pick the bright orange and red at the back with zig zags tell her i said thank you thats so sweet 
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I think feel lonely, overwhelmed, tired and under pressure are all very clear triggers that can get any of us going - whether the reaction inside is a craving or other kinds of emotions like anger, saddness, resentment or sone sort of self loathing apathy. Life is a damn rollercoaster and we are just along forbthe ride, then trying to manage feelings on top of that WHILE keeping faith and hope alive…well its a tall freaking order. Some days we just feel down. Some days we just feel low. Sone days are just plain old days to get through. I think its great youre putting this out there, especially feeling such strong cravings. What i have learned about shit feelings and cravings is that…they usually dont come out of nowhere. Theres usually something, or many things under. Some days are for digging and expliring and some days are for sittingbwith the feelings and saying hey, you know what as much as this sucks its OK that i feel this way. Its normak to have off and shit days, but I think part of what can make it difficult too is we on some level always feel like bad feelings or shit days are our fault. Like we arent working hard enough, are lacking in some way and need to “do” in order to get out of the feelings and state. This is true sometimes, and its just life other times. Sometimes its that we need to get into action; and sometines its about accepting that today is just a rough day. Im learning about this 2nd part, because I am a hardcore solve it/fix it person.
One perspectivr that is new to me this time around is that this part of me - the craving/drinking part - she isnt my enemy. She isnt just a disease and devil on my back. Shes actually (in my newly incorporated view that was offered to me by someone with 35 yo sobriety, someone who I genuinely look up to and who has been a huge support and inspiration through this chapter in my life) is that…this part of me needs love. This part of me is tryibg to help - when i am feeling lonely, hopeless; overwhelmed and stressed - she is that very young versiob of myself, who learned to use alcohol to cope when I was just a young child. She is afraid, and she contains a lot of the feelings in absolute form - fear of loneliness forever, fear of hopelessness always, fear fear fear of being hurt. She wants ro help by being like here, this i know works to numb and ease the pain. Her intentions are good; her direction is young and misguided and in the end cayses more harm. How can I care for this younger part of myself? How can I show her love, what is she afraid of? What is she struggling with? What does she not trust that we can handle without alcohol? Anyway, just one perspective but I have found it really altering for me becayse I was taught long ago that I should love my scars yet there was always more of a narrative of my alcoholism as the beast in the back doing push ups. What a revalation to think of that beast as a child, and how do children behave to things that overwhelm? In the ebst way they know how.
Wishing you lots of love and sending hugs. These days loke this are not easy & we are all here with you xo.
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First, it takes one to know one! We’re definitely not alone, nope. And aw, I hear you on the not feeling good enough, but you know what? I think there’s real power in “name it to tame it”. You came here, named it, and that takes most of the wind out of the sails of those kind of thoughts - at least, that’s my experience.
My counsellor suggested something else that’s working well for me - kind of more of a mindfulness exercise. Instead of thinking of what I did and didn’t get done at the end of the day, I try to do more of a “I loved how I noticed the sun on the trees. I didn’t clean the floors but the dog girl got a longer walk. I laughed with a friend on the phone and it felt great.”
Your daughter will remember moments, not things. You’ve already given her so many of these moments! 
Oh, and if she’s like me, she’ll probably remember those yorkshire pudding too! 
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Thank you so much Mira…i do need to remember that its ok to not feel ok sometimes…today has been rough but i know it will pass…i did something similar a while ago when i was coming to terms with the rejection of my father when i was a child…i realised that id been carrying my inner child around like heavy rucksack and i was still that little girl who wanted her daddy to come back and save her from her abusive stepfather and distant mother…it hadnt occurred to me that she had grown into a capable woman who no longer needed saving and at that realisation i let her go…i know its not the same as what your saying but i like your analogy and will give it some deep thought, thank you dear Mira…gratefully receiving the love and sending lots of love your way too. We have each other 
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Name it to tame it…i LOVE that! Its been a couple of days ive been internalising it…feeling like im suffering in secret which i know is a slippery slope…im trying to learn when to reach out like its my duty…its not easy.
On the yorkshire pudding front…my daughter hates them!! How is she even mine??? 
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Hey! Sorry to hear you’re struggling today.
Some days are just hard, aren’t they? Those are the days we make the best of, and we hope for a brighter day tomorrow. I have come to appreciate that alcohol never helps make any day better, and definitely makes the next day(s) worse!
Sending hugs from down south x
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Thank you James…yes…ive had a few bad days is all really…it really helps to reach out and get out of my head a little because i get stuck in a loop…reaching out has worked…i already feel a bit better, i will be hitting the pillow sober tonight for sure, even with how ive felt ive still managed to make sure my daughter had a brilliant day and cook a banging easter roast dinner for me, my daughter and my folks so for that i am proud and tomorrow is a new day x
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You have done well today, still pushed through and made the day nice for your family. That is strength my friend.
It can be so exhausting and draining pretending to be okay - for me it is.
I have started to try to remind myself what I tell everyone else : That the feelings are temporary. At the time it doesn’t feel like it. But I just wanted to say I’m proud of you for staying strong 
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Sorry to hear that! Better days are ahead. Wish peace upon you. 
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Those cravings can be so random. Just remember they are temporary and you can get through it. You’ve got this!
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I’m not a doctor so this could be totally wrong, but it sounds like post-acute withdrawal syndrome to me. Keep riding the sober train, you got this 
!!! You’ve beaten the addiction every day so far, so you’re able to beat these cravings as well! I believe in you friend!!! 
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Sending Hugs from Canada. You got this! Keep you mind focused on the positive 
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Im right here with you! I also came just to get this out. My cravings are awful today. All i want is a couple drinks to unwind and ease the irritability and stress. I know how bad it will make me feel tomorrow & I know that One drink and my life will spiral. I will drink for days. Weeks. Im so anxious. Ugh good luck, you got this.
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I was told when I couldn’t figure out what was causing me uneasiness, and I went thru HALT (hungry, angry, lonely, tired) and still couldn’t figure it out it was OK if I just reached out to someone and tell them my head is up my backside right now and I don’t know why. They’d tell me to do all the relapse prevention stuff as if I knew why, keep busy and stay connected. It would eventually pass, sometimes minutes, sometimes hours.
As long as I woke up the next day and hadn’t used, it was all good. Act as if they would tell me…
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I just want to say a big thank you to everyone for supporting me yesterday
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Im wondering now if this is hormones aswell…i feel really tearful and vunerable this morning…not like me at all…the stresses i mentioned yesterday are always there but they dont usually get to me as much as this…sorry if this is TMI …i dont know my cycle as i dont get periods as i have an implant in my arm but this morning i noticed my boobs are hurting…tearful…cant get my head together feeling…at least if this is what it is it will pass…
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Aaaah, that does sound hormonal That is tough as even if you objectively get it, you still feel the emotions. Or possibly you are coming down with something? Either way, be really kind to yourself, take care xx
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Thank you Jenny…my daughter is going to her dads for a few hours today so im going to relax, eat some good food and maybe watch a nice film…at least it will pass i just hope its soon xx
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