Deep breathes indeed…yes… smoking will not help in any way…you are doing great my friend… Keep busy and focused…just get through one moment at a time 
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Way to go on getting thru to the 2nd week without smoking!! @desert_rose
Proud of you! Keep fighting the good fight.
Smoking bad
Fresh air good
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Hang in there Anna! You’re almost past the worst. Doing fantastic. 
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Thank you, @JazzyS @Cjp and @Mno for the words of encouragement. It really helps. Today is just one of those days… very restless and I just need to get through to the other side.
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Almost nine years in. Going to therapy this morning, after a mentally tough week following emdr last week, finally beginning to deal with the abuse and the abusive teacher in elementary school.
Exiting Utrecht train station a guy in front of me lit a sickarette. First time in years I liked the smell. Made me crave a bit. Which made me giggle. I shrugged it off.
Ten minutes later, a couple on a bench in a small park both were smoking. I nearly asked them for one. Which made me giggle again, but this time in a shocked and startled way.
Nearly nine years. I’ve been telling that I never crave smoking no more, that the smell is abhorrent and disgusting to me. That smoking couldn’t be further from my mind. That I see it as just a stupid lying killing addiction. Which is all true, until this morning, walking towards therapy, tired, a bit unstable, trying to deal with some traumatic stuff from 50 years ago. I craved and I could have caved.
So glad I didn’t. I did think it through. I remembered how that first one would taste, how it would have made me nauseous, dizzy, how it would have given me a headache. And how it wouldn’t stop with one. It never stops with one. It would be the end of me actually. Quitting smoking changed my life and starting again would undo all I’ve done and achieved.
I didn’t do it. I told a friend, a former smoker, right away. And I talked about it with my therapist, who actually didn’t quite seem to grasp the enormity of it. She’s not an addict.
So glad I’m still smoke free. Lesson learned. It’s never 100% over. Not One Puff Ever. Smoking is Stupid. Smoking Kills. Smoking bad. Fresh Air Good. Love.
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Right on Menno 
It’s weird how in times of stress that the stinky smoke smells good and tempting. Keep up the good fight my Friend. 
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Heck yeah @Mno proud of you for acknowledging the crave and not letting it win. Keep leading the way!
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Almost 9 years…that’s impressive man. Sorry that all the work you are doing is causing such emotional stress and actually making these cigs seem appealing. Never again friend…we are not going to go backwards. Grateful you did not cave. Grateful you had a good friend to talk it out with. Those who are not addicts will never know the struggle.
Into another addiction free day
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I want you to know how good it makes me feel to read all your comments.This next friday mark one month sinc3 i left my worst enemy who used to confort me before, that day I’m going out with friends to an afer office , Maybe I fall , maybe I don’t.
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Hopefully you don’t.
1 month milestone is huge…I hope to celebrate it with you next week. Our urges do tend to get stronger as milestones approach.
Go to the dinner with determination of stay smoke free and have a plan in place of urges or situations arise. I do know that if I lit up even once I would be doomed…it is like the addiction senses all awaken and come at me full force so that is why it’s not even one puff ever.
We got your back here… keep up the great work
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Can I give more than one 
to your post?
So glad you thought it through. So very happy for you.
It is not something that someone who has not battled an addiction can grasp. I certainly can.
Big hugs, and wishing a lifetime of breaths of fresh air to you!
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Hell yeah CJ! 
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Hell yeah girl 
. You are showing up for yourself every day! The efforts are showing too… keep up the excellent work 
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I love you guys 
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Weeks ago, I posted about day one, and it was all of a day and a half before I was back on. So here we go again. I had a few puffs this morning, but as of 9:25am CDT, I am beginning a new first 24 hours without nicotine (vaping). Wish me luck! 
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No luck needed Erin, although I wish you all the luck in the world. Strength and determination and knowledge of addiction and how to beat it, and your peers (us) and supportive friends are needed and I wish you all of that too!!! Wishing you all success!
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How are you doing? Just keep at it friend…don’t give in to those cravings…it is one moment at a time…we got your back 
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