Hi I am new to posting,
I read often here, it helps to read what others post and reply. But I am still trying to get my shit together!!! I keep resetting my clock. I have been busy with the shifts I work and have not attended a meeting in awhile. I finally hit the gym today (first night sober again!!!). I am currently waiting for hr to decide if I am fired. It’s the weekend and they wont get back to me until Monday or Tuesday 
. I really loved this job!! I had it for 3 months and just passed my 90 days probation , I was sober all of those 90 days and felt great. THEN I BINGED for 2 days and did no call no show! They like me and I am a hard worker . They fired me 3 days ago and I wrote a letter to hr about how much I love working for the company, and shockingly my manager called me in to question me on what happened? “Why did I not come in for 2 days?” She said this is not like you?"(little does she know!!) I made up some crazy story to save my.job and she felt bad for me, so I am now waiting to see if they will let me come back. It sucks… I have lost a handful of really good jobs due to being an alcoholic and the anxiety that comes with it, also the hangovers. Again I did it again!!
I had almost 2 months alchohol free and felt great. I decided to have a sip of wine to sleep the night before my shift"since I was doing so well’ my binge ended up 18 beers a bottle of wine and at some point I added in come and Hennessy, I do not remember that I just woke up and saw the bottle. I was so sick I didn’t even bother to call out for my shift. My phone rang and rang and I ignored it. Once I sobered up I panicked as to what i had just done and was so panicked i didn’t call work back or go in the next day. By day 3 i just went to hr and asked them"what is my status?" They handed me the papers to sign , and u did so.
Then i began to plea bargain. I am hoping it works i can’t do this again to myself. I love this job
I’ve had so many day 1’s I can’t even count them. It may feel like a mess right now, but it’s just the end of a bad time in your life, and career. Use the time between now and when you hear back from HR to go to meetings, and build a plan. The “Jenny 1 Plan” Visualize going back to work sober. Visualize the future with out this kind of drama. I wish you the best.
Keep Hammering!!!
I know dammit!! I was doing so well this time. I work so hard and so well!! I have an awesome job in room service and I was getting so much praise about how well I handled it. The money is pretty good and I felt so healthy because its alot if runnning around to deliver to rooms! It’s a good job in Vegas and good insurance. They just couldn’t figured out why I suddenly" flaked" I felt evil lol. Like “hahaha… you dont not know me” . Thanks 333!! I hit the gym today and I will follow your suggestion for the rest of the days while I wait for my outcome 
Well start by staying sober. Nothing will work if you are drunk as you may have figured out. It’s Friday night, a tough day for a drunk in early recovery, and it leads to the weekend which is also tough. Hit a meeting, go for walks, don’t stress the job because you have no control over it and what happens will happen.
Are you in this alone? Who knows about your problem and your attempt at sobriety?
Get a game plan for the weekend, binge watch tv, hang with sober conscious people, hike, paint a room and then paint it again, volunteer at a soup kitchen. Volunteering is really helpful, get out of yourself and into others with no thought of compensation but the good feeling of helping others.
Day by day get better at getting better as @Yoda-Stevie is known to say. It’s the most effective way to stay sober in my humble opinion. Don’t worry about tomorrow, it will work out if you focus on today and the right choices you can make today.
This hit me like a rolling ball!!I will soak this reply in for the next days to come. I knew I had to get out of the house today ! I hit some new grocery stores that just opened here and walked.
Stopped by my gym afterwards and walked. Came home and read on here.
The hardest part is not drinking again to cure my hangover and anxiety. It’s so hot here tomorrow !but after reading your reply I already have a plan to just go to my gym, they have a TV room and a pool lol. Meeting at 530 . Getting outside of myself is just what I need to start doing, I wish I knew someone like you at the meetings I attend. Thanks. Liking your ideas
Go to the meetings and there will be plenty lol. Nothing but love in the rooms. Ask if they’re going for coffee after and just hang around, in my experience they’re always looking for extras/new people so they can hear new stuff.
I know about the hot, it’s been over 110° the last couple days in Phoenix, thankfully I’m a lizard and like walking in the heat.
I need to stay sober. (Nobody knows unless it is someone at my AA meetings). I look sick to others at times I am sure with the red eyes and bags and blotchy skin from my BP spiked! I felt so good and clean, healthy, smarter. I dont know what triggered the relapse . I keep doing in them I binge so bad that I am drunk for a day and a night , then spend 2 days throwing up stuck in the bathroom, that’s why I missed work . I was so sick I thought about calling 911 . So sick of myself. Annoyed.
I don’t miss any of that. I don’t miss the puking, the putting holes in walls, the missed work, the going to jail, the constant being broke, the constant lethargy, the comparisons I would make of myself and others/not feeling adequate.
Sober life gives you everything you dream of when your drunk. All the grand plans you dream up are achievable while sober.
. Damn. I agree. Thank you. You just kicked my butt right back up!! I hope they give me my job back with my lame lie I told. I am restarting now again. I have to find out what my mental problem is that makes me want to drink again for no real reason. I like this job and I dont want to lose it Nd spiral again.
I went to a lot of meetings and IOP. It was incredibly helpful. Found a higher power and practice an attitude of gratitude.
I drank because it was the easiest way to cope with the hell I had created for my own life, couldn’t cope very well and was prone to anger and mood swings. King Alcohol was the best friend and the worst enemy. Accepting my past, making amends for a lot of the wrongs I did and accepting life on life’s terms made a profound change.
I’m a proud alcoholic today. I play the tape/think the drink through if I get a craving. I think about how good it’ll make me feel, then I kill that romance by continuing to think about what will happen after the 2nd, 3rd, 30th drink.
Wise wise man!! I plan to go to my meeting tomorrow, Its been 3 months. It would be nice to tell a person I need help and someone to sponsor me. You just pumped me up for the next few days. Even though I might be fired😖
You “might be”. Won’t know til they tell you so don’t stress it.
As for a sponsor, they’re a great tool to use for help. I wouldn’t jump straight in for one, try to attend a meeting(the same one) daily for about 2 weeks and you will know who to ask. They’ll be the person who you relate to the most, someone who has something you want; that beautiful creature called happiness in sobriety.
I always liked to say no, in denial. I was VP of a very successful company for 11 years making a substantial salary. I quit on the spot when drunk for getting screwed over. I have acted like a victim, but the truth is, my drinking was a downward spiral in my career causing me to get screwed over. One such event was getting shitfaced at an airport, denied access to my flight, and apparently belligerently firing my employee for not staying with me. Ah, the proud moments. 
Hey Jenny 
I’m Tracy. Sweating bullets over work, job on the line, and even at a hotel just like you…that was me.
I was a Banquet Manager at a huge hotel. Had 100’s of people working for me. There was an employee Christmas party the night before…I skipped out on helping to set it up & threw my own pre-party for my staff instead. Showed up drunk. I remember bits & pieces. Pretty sure I treated everyone to dance moves… I didn’t have. Drove home drunk, sideswiped a parked ambulance. Saw sparks flying out my rear view mirror, did a complete 180’ in the street and blew a tire. One of my employee’s husband saw and changed the tire… while I threw up on his wife.
Came into work an hour early the next morning (you know to show my dedication 
). Sat in the parking lot first and guzzled Scope mouthwash…I thought this was a brilliant way to ingest alcohol undetected.
Heard HR wanted to speak with me, I seriously walked into their office thinking I’d get a raise…they thought they’d fire me instead. This was the beginning of the end for me & alcohol.
You have no control over what they’ll do come Monday. No one has a crystal ball, but there are two possible outcomes. And I’m here to assure you that either will be ok…as long as you stay sober. Consider maintaining your sobriety as your #1 job always, and other areas of your life will begin to fall in place beautifully
I would start being honest with your employers about why you miss work. They are generally way more understanding and may even offer to help
Hey there! I know it’s tough- I’ve lost jobs that may or may not have been booze related. You also have the ability to focus ona new life. This is a second chance. Try and turn to your Higher Power. I can’t count how many times my Spirit Guides have presented on these important occasions. Don’t forget to ask!
Well said: sobriety is our #1 job and everything DOES fall into place! The Promises in the AA book DO come true!
Thanks for sharing your story- that could have been me. Aren’t we glad we didn’t kill someone or ourselves. …
Nicely put. I think it’s just luck I didn’t kill anyone or have a serious accident. I got caught and banned for a long time but prior to that I’d get drunk and go for a drive for no other reason than to drive like a lunatic drunk. I genuinely thought when I was drunk I was a better driver! That’s what being an 18 year old does for you.
I think all my jobs I’ve lost as a result of alcohol. Two directly but the others I’ve usually quit due to my mental state, hungover and annoyed, or just generally being reckless.
Christ the things we do hey. I wish my 24 year old self would have listened to my inner monologue when I knew I had a problem.
Me too. My 16 year old self, my 23 year old self, my 42 year old self. Those were seriously times when I had the recognition but clearly not willing to live a life without booze. I had NO IDEA how much better life is on this side!
This is empowering!! Thank u for that. I couldn’t reply last night as a new member I had limited replies allowed