Hello, this is around the 20th time that I’ve installed this app in the last few years but I’m hoping to make it stick this time.
I’m 33 in two months and I’ve been drinking most days since I was a teenager. On average I was drinking a bottle of wine or four pints of beer a night.
3 days sober at a time is the longest I’ve achieved previously, 3 days sober then 20 days drinking every day and repeat.
I have BPD and really struggle with controlling my impulsiveness.
However, I have one kidney and over the last few years, every time I have the annual function test, it’s decreased in function.
I really don’t want to die, I just want to stop poisoning myself and get better. It’s difficult because I’ve never been a sober adult and so I have no positive memories of being sober to focus on.
I hope it will be different with more of a support network on here.
Nice to meet everyone x
Yep, that all sounds familiar! You’re not alone. Alcohol creeps in to so many areas of life that it’s hard to think of doing anything without booze.
Just take it one day at a time. You will find that sober person inside you. You may even like her!
Hey your not on your own. Finding some peace is what I would like and a journey I think we can all find. On here there’s lots of great people who when you share will give the best. Sometimes the hard touch but the best. Today’s the start not just for you
I hope you stick around again this time as well. You are worth doing this.
Welcome!
I can relate to this. I’ve been sober for 16 months and have experienced life in a whole new way. I’m doing things sober that I didn’t think I’d be able to do. Good luck on your journey!
Thanks everyone, it’s day 4 tomorrow and I’ve managed to make it to day 3 so I’m feeling positive. 
Wow! Well done!
Welcome back and it’s wonderful to meet you. You seem to care about your health and well being and that is a good start. You can make it stick if you stick with it. Find a program, get involved, build your sobriety toolkit, and you will learn how to process your life in sober ways (and you’ll be happy you did!). Do you have a recovery program you can work? Have you looked at some of these options? A lot have online programs available too:
I really hope you give this forum a solid chance. You will quickly find that there is an enormous amount of support without judgement. The forum is on my shortlist of the tools that are allowing a level of success for myself. Very nice to meet you. Be kind to yourself.
Thank you, I’ll take a look 
so far I’ve been reading sobriety books and using time counters but any other resources would be useful.
Good for you! Keep it up - you will get there I am sure 