Hugs Pauly 
1 Like
you can’t shock me, I know the reality of the situation, while I was out walking I had the separation conversation all worked out, when I get time to myself I’m going to write the whole process down, I have no where else to live atm and I’m not losing my job and being homeless again. Personally if she thinks I’m selfish then let’s see how she feels about me giving her her time and life back, I’m very good at moving on and putting my past behind me, we are not married so all I would take would be me, my clothes and a guitar. Who really needs anything in life, as the years go by we collect so much shit and it just sits around the house being pointless. Alcohol 2/10. weed 5/10. Bath soon, bed is slowly getting closer.
4 Likes
Hey, so sorry to hear you’re dealing with this. CONGRATS ON TWO MONTHS though…AND for coming on here instead of relapsing. Unfortunately, not everyone is vibrating on the same frequency as us when we get sober. Is there a way to get some space so you don’t put yourself in more jeopardy?? It can be taking your wife a while to come to grips with this new version of you. Also though…if she IS an addict/alcoholic as well and doesn’t want to seek out a sober life, this might be the time that you are starting to recognize the truth of that. Either way, no matter what, you are FAR more able to handle what to do next with a clear and sober mind 
3 Likes
TBH knowing you are all out there is calming in itself. Thank you for being here when I need you, My HP has got me this far and its been an amazing journey of discovery, I’m not going to over think it and make any hasty decisions bc so far everything has worked out for the best, arguing or not what will be will be. Who knows maybe she will leave me, then problem solved, bc she is still here and she must be here for something or other and I know it’s not for my money or big knob 
1 Like
hello and welcome, WOW, that’s a way to break yourself in gentle. 
. I’m hanging on my friend and yes do learn from this, it’s all any of us can do. thank you.
2 Likes
thank you, I nearly did this and was gonna go to the coast and go to a bed and breakfast but for now I’m just trying to get to bed time. Oh the joys.
1 Like
Sounds like a plan my friend DM if u need to.
1 Like
@Dolse71 I’m sorry that your are finding yourself in this situation but you have done bloody well in coming here first and ultimately maintaining your sobriety, so many would have just picked up and then posted tomorrow full of regret. 
4 Likes
Bless you for sharing this Paul. This is so powerful. You will get through today. Just today. And bit by bit the relationship and hardship will gain new perspective and find a way I hope for you. I wish I had shared yesterday when I was in a similar position going overboard with frustration.
1 Like
They phone will feel as though it weighs a tonne when we are in a situation where we need to reach out for some help or words of encouragement so I understand your not reaching out last night, you know what to do in the future now though.
1 Like
I know where you live, everyone has been great though, it’s a bit overwhelming.
1 Like
it was close but I did it back to front once before and obviously it was too late by then. its life lessons mate. cheers. 
3 Likes
hopefully you will next time. thank you.
Exactly, we live and learn.
This reminds me of the situation that I had with my wife last September when she discovered that I was on TS secretly behind her back for 2.5 years.
The thread is here:
In fact, I have some very good updates to post about this which I will do right now.
2 Likes
Hi guys and gals, situation not great but the day will soon be over so update : Chance of drinking and smoking is now 0/10. Thank you all so much.
10 Likes
Maybe take a few weeks apart. Allow yourself to focus on sobriety and get your head straight. Best of luck.
Good night wee Paul; sleep well~!
1 Like
I’ve been where you are Paul, many times over the past 3 month. Mine made too many promises to quit drinking and never followed through. He finally quit NYE, at least I think so. He tells me he’s not drinking but some actions make me think he hasn’t. Been quite distant until he proves it to me. Hang in there friend hopefully this will pass.
2 Likes
So very true A****.
1 Like