This past week has been insane. A week ago my life was so much different as was everyone else’s. I’ve been working so much and going to the gym and hitting meetings and have a commitment to my homegroup to open.
And my job closed as well as the gym on Tuesday. No pay.
No meetings. Quarantined.
I’m alone in this city with no one. It feels super lonely to not have a someone.
It’s all so surreal. I know it all hasn’t hit me. Thank God for warm weather yesterday and today because I have spent it outside with very small groups in the sun. I know if I completely isolate my disease of the mind will kill me faster than anything else.
I’m so hyper aware of that fact.
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about my sobriety.
I feel like it might all come crashing down real soon.
The weather is going to cool down here starting tomorrow and I’m worried how that will affect my mood, but I just really have to take one hour a time.
But I am also aware of the tiny blessings in disguises.
I needed out of that job.
I’ve connected with friends in recovery on a deeper level.
I’ve practiced setting boundaries with people.
I’m realizing the people and things that are most important to me.
And the people that are prioritizing and valuing myself.
The earth is going through an awakening.
And so am I.
I pray for everyone affected.
Please keep me in your prayers as well.
Just for today.