Hi @Liieah77 and welcome to this place. It sounds like work, albeit you are around alc and drunk ppl, is not your biggest obstacle, if I understand this right:
So, you have good reason to stop drinking, the chaos you’re describing sounds very familiar to me. Your life will become a lot more manageable sober …
I also work bar and have for a long time. I don’t think i had more than five shifts sober in as many years before I stopped drinking for good. It certainly exacerbated my alcoholism and escapism to be in this environment. I’m even grateful for that now, as who knows how long it would have taken me otherwise to quit one of my oldest, dearest and certainly most destructive coping mis-mechanism…
Work has not been a trigger for me, and I decided to keep my job when I got sober as I needed the stability and security (I’m good at it) while I turned around and started facing everything I’d been running from in recovery and therapy. I wish you the same period of deep connectIng with yourself, learning and rebuilding sth for yourself. That said, had work been an issue in sobriety, I would have known which one had to go.
I’ll attach a few of my fav threads
Mental health memes
Advice for the Newcomer and Constant Relapser
Resources for our recovery
Hope to see you around! 