I’m just in a loop

I keep relapsing, I’m doing everything else I need to do, why do I keep finding myself back at square one… I know there’s no one but me choosing this. :disappointed: I just feel stuck.

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It can be hard to feel like its a choice when the choice you are making is the one you don’t want to make. That is where addiction comes in. I am an addict so my brain is wired differently. Instead of being able to stop once I start something my mind revs up and wants more. The only way for me to avoid the loop is to never drink that first drink. I have some control as long as I don’t take that first drink. Once I take that first one, all is lost.

What have you been trying to stay sober?

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Sorry you feel stuck in a relapse loop. I’ve been in that boat myself. I finally got out of the loop when I tweaked my tools. By that I mean finding more things that helped me stay sober. One was reading about the nature of addiction, and the damage alcohol really does to body, mind, and spirit. another was coming to TS every day . Reading for support, for tips, and checking in to be accountable to someone other than myself. Learning to trust and believe in myself. Learning to tell the voice of addiction inside my head to fuck off. Seven months ago I was relapsing every other day. TS really was the one tool I needed to add. Once I latched on here, it’s made all the difference. Hope this helps.:heart:

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Relapses sucks, they drain you out I know. I had a few myself…Untill I had enough and was willing to try everything :thinking: And that was where the changes started. Me wanting recovery so badly.

Maybe you can use this forum more? And maybe there are more things you aren’t aware of you can add?
When I came here years ago I discovered so many things of my addiction I didn’t know. And also many things that I never thought of that could help me to beat my addiction.
Have you read this for example? What's YOUR plan? ore 2 years sober and what helped me to get there:. Have you tried meetings?
Recovery is trial and error for me. It still is. Getting out of my comfort zone and be here every day to keep myself focussed.
I hope to see you around here more. There is no magic trick ore button to become sober, I wish there was. It’s still work for me, even after more then 5 years sober.
Not saying that you are not working hard, because I don’t know :hugs:

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If so its not working maybe try a meeting get to know like minded people who have been were you are now wish you well

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Man I get you. I don’t really have any words of wisdom to offer because I’m in a relapse myself and just barely starting my rehab process, but I can say that you shouldn’t be too hard on yourself for relapsing. Relapsing is human, it happens, it’s okay, you’ll stop the loop eventually when you feel ready to. Wishing you all the best dude.

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It’s been three days since I’ve stopped, honestly due to running out and not going in my basement. My body feels sick so I’ve only been walking and doing small things in my home. Tomorrow will be better

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I really appreciate you, it has been helpful using this app reading others stories and to know I’m not alone in this. I come from a family of addicts and living with then don’t help when I keep trying to break free.

I truly truly thank you all, I have thought of joining a support group, I’m just scared. Everytime I’ve relapsed I know it’s fear pushing me away from myself. I rather stay comfortable than move into what I’ve prepared for myself. I’ve never had true guidance in my life, I know I can make up for it now. I’m just afraid.

Fear is a powerful force. But you also have inside you the inner wisdom that has brought you to this point in your life. Touch in on that. Come here often and reach out when you need help. Take it one day at a time. We are here for you!:pray::heart:

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If you ride out these bad feelings this could be your last day one ever. Stick with it and dump what you have in the house if you can.

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Hello :wave: its hard isnt it, i was stuck in the loop for a long time before i actually quit id drink then usually black out then wake up the next day …tell myself never again …that today would be the day id quit then the guilt and shame would start to swallow me and bang im back at it because i didnt want to feel so bad and the only way it would stop was to drink it away…id wake up and just cry at the feeling of being so trapped in my addiction, it was hell. So i get it i really do…eventually i got my rock bottom and i had to stop because there was too much at stake…you can do it you know…you can be stronger than your addiction…yes its hard but so is drinking and being stuck on the loop so its pick your hard time…nothing will change if you keep relapsing…youve got to see it through…but you dont have to do any of it alone youve got all of us here, are you looking after yourself when you keep trying to stay sober as in are you eating properly, hydrating? Are you treating yourself with kindness? Because you need to do all of that to give yourself the best chance at getting through those early days… sending you love and hugs :heart: :people_hugging:

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