Failed again , and I can’t even manage a post on here !
You just posted, you’re here, you’re not alone. Together we can do this. I’m glad you’re here Mandy. Let’s work on this. Together.
I don’t know how to navigate this, I’m not brilliant at technology but today for the what feels like a million times I said I wouldn’t drink… and I did , and my son, Is so disappointed in me and I feel so awful at letting him down but I’ve let me down too
I’m glad your here.
Have a good read around. Join in when your comfortable.
I just looked up failure. It means lack of success. I guess I was a failure too, until I hung out with some successful people. And I’ll tell ya. I’m grateful it’s working.
Great first step.
You’re managing fine with posting here. Maybe it’s an idea to read around a bit. This one is a good place to start:
We can’t do it alone Mandy. We need help. From our fellows, people with the same problems as we do. You can find us here, and in real life too, in meetings like AA or SMART. Maybe you need professional help too, I don’t know. Be sure there’s absolutely no shame in that. Can’t do it alone. Nobody can.
Thank you but my day ones have turned into a joke , no matter what I do I have no control over this addiction, I’m fed up with myself, no one else can possibly be be this ridiculous, people have days weeks months, but I for some reason can’t get 24 hours, and I am so desperate
1st and foremost, please don’t think you’re a failure. Would a failure continue to try? No. I feel you, I went over a decade of heavy/binge drinking vodka. I also could not string together more than 2 or 3 days.
I’m not sure how long you’ve been drinking, but if it’s been awhile, you may have some withdrawals, but it gets better, ask anyone here.
When I came here, I finally got passed that 3 day trap. First time I made it 23 days, I couldn’t believe it! I have had a few relapses, many people do, and many don’t. But I refuse to beat myself up. I keep trying, because I will never go back to the daily drinkfest that was my life. I’m still a work in progress, but I refuse to give up.
I believe in you, please believe in yourself that you can do this!
Here’s a few things that worked for me:
Stay busy, anything to occupy your time.
If tired, sleep, if hungry eat. Stay hydrated.
I bought all kinds of treats and different foods from the store, don’t worry if you have sugar cravings, that’s normal.
Do you have any hobbies? I picked up diamond painting. Do anything you like. Yoga, movies, read, games. None of that I did while drinking, I would never remember what I watched or read.
Everyday is a new day. And many have been through what you’re going through. We all care and try to help each other.
Keep coming back and sharing.
I think if you’re here, then that is a huge indicator of success likelihood down the line. Think about this place like it’s a sobriety gym that you’re working out in. Some people are jacked and throwing weights around, others are going really slow on an stationary bike recovering from injuries (like relapses). But we’re all working out trying to do better. Good luck, I’ve been there. I’m only on day 8 creeping up on 9 after losing well over a year. Stay on the offense as best as you can. And don’t underestimate yourself.
I have drank most probably my whole life ! My parents used to have house parties and my brother and I being 4 and 3 used to be up and just taking the remnants of the bottles , he also has an alcohol addiction! I worked in bars and went out a lot , but when I married it stopped a while I had 6 babies and I drank maybe just as everyone else did but then my eldest daughter, who I love beyond compare, started drinking at 17 or so and got in with worst crowd and ended up on heroin , we found her one evening, she was 28 and she had heart failure from all the damage drink and drugs had on her body , and since that day 8 years ago I have drowned myself in alcohol every night , but no one knows , only my son who is still at home , because every day I get up at 5am and every day I am there for my 9 grandchildren, but my nights are oblivion
I want to add, IF there’s any alcohol in the house, REMOVE IT ASAP!.
I can’t tell you how often I told myself it wouldn’t bother me. I even tried to convince myself that having it, would lessen my cravings because I knew I had it. (WTF brain?!)
There is never alcohol by morning!
We have all been there. I too have felt like u do. It took time and self love. You have to change your thoughts. Be nice to you. Try and shower and wash away the negative one step at a time. Shut off the negative thoughts in your head. Today we start a new way because what u have been doing isn’t working. Today you try new things. Today u are here with us and we will get through this together ! I would recommend a good shower. Put on some fresh clothes. Eat something on the healthier side of things. Chugs a nice glass of water or two. Breathe and remember to love yourself first ! You got this !
How old is your son, can he help?
I’ve drank most of my life too, my Dad found it funny to give booze to us kids. I started with beer, went to wine, was a pretty heavy drinker on both, told myself I could quit anytime. Then around 2008, dated a guy that drank vodka. He didn’t last, but my love for vodka did.
I’m very sorry for the loss of your daughter.
He’s 21 but I can’t put anymore on him , he is so lovely , and he doesn’t drink or smoke , or do anything like that , ,he is so kind and never
Picks me up on forgetting things or leaving candles burning and lights on , falling asleep in random places , but I’m a burden ! And I hated my mother for being one , it’s only a matter of time before he does
He sounds great, what I mean, when he’s around, can you guys watch movies, play games? It really helps to start changing the cycle by changing the pattern of your evenings.
Don’t think long term, start with One Day At A Time. ODAAT. You will see that written here often. Each day is a new day, each day you make it sober IS a win!
Yes we do watch movies and he still wants me to go to the cinema with him I will do one day at a time , tomorrow, is my day one again , thank you , xx
Please go to the cinema with him, it would be a great day 1. Come back and let us know. Remember, you’re here for a reason, and you’re special and deserve sobriety and a clean, happy life.