I quit without AA, 56 days :)


#41

Only 30 days, but still 30 days that I haven’t had a drink, and that I’ve done on my own, which is important to me. The only support I acknowledge is this Forum, (save a few self rightious near do wells that I wish I could filter out). The insights many peeps share here I so grounding, I truly apperciate being able to come here. Thx peeps


#42

Absolutely but claiming success after 56 days is a little premature. Kind of like saying a car is reliable after driving it 100 miles. I’ll let you know if AA worked for me when I’m on my death bed. When I don’t have anymore tomorrows ahead of me I’ll know for sure.


#43

Thanks. I did. I’m glad I went🖒. It was an awesome way to start my day😀


#44

I’m at four years and two months sober. No AA, no SMART or any other program. And while I can’t predict the future or know anything past this moment, I feel like I’m solid. I’m done with alcohol.

Over the last four years I’ve spent a lot of time examining how big a role I allowed alcohol to play in my life-- and how that role morphed and grew over time. I fucked up all sorts of relationships in my life, humiliated myself countless times, I crashed cars, destroyed friendships, exposed myself to danger and woke up morning after morning hating myself for what I had done the night before. Stewed in alcohol, I also stalled for a decade or so when I could have been moving forward. When I was drinking, I didn’t question my behaviors or analyze them. I drank so that I wouldn’t have to think much about anything. Instead I felt proud of being a good drunk. My fool ass believed that drinking was a talent-- something I was very good at. I thought it made me cool. Of course, drunken shenanigans that might have been marginally cute in my 20’s became a lot sadder, desperate and less cute in my 30’s and 40’s.

I credit my initial sobriety to staying the hell away from bars and my old drinking buddies for the first six months. It was lonely and I felt quite sorry for myself but I stayed away from old places and faces because I knew I would not have been strong enough to say no. But if I’m completely honest, the reason I got sober when I did is because I had changed jobs right before I quit. I didn’t have many friends in the new job and I knew I had a choice of expending the effort to make friends with all the drunks in the new office or trying to stop the craziness altogether. Also shortly before I quit, I watched a lawyer in my new office who was in his 60’s, who was too shitfaced to walk, get carried out of a bar by our 20 year old colleagues and all I could think was, my god, that’s going to be me.

After the first six months of self imposed isolation, my fitbit and the Hamilton soundtrack carried me through my city and the rest of the first year or my sobriety. I love them both passionately because of this. With the fitbit I got physically active again (after years of sedentary drinking) and I lost a lot of weight which felt wonderful and further inspired me to stay healthy by not drinking. I also read a ton of books, blogs and articles about sobriety and about others who had struggled through addiction. Since then, its become progressively easier to stay sober. I’ve changed a lot and taught myself to recognize when I am under stress and developed new methods of handling boredom, stress and disappointment.

This site has been a good resource for me. I feel that I have a much better understanding of some things that I have not personally experienced because of the stories that people have shared on this site and it’s been both a support and education for me.

I’ve never been to AA. I have read enough here to know that its been a lifeline for many people. I think that’s great but I don’t think its the only way. I think that sobriety, like most things in life, is individualized. What works for some, may not work for others.

When I was drinking, I couldn’t imagine a life without alcohol. It seemed like my life would be so dreary and awful without it. I was so wrong.


#45

That is a great accomplishment. Could you share how you did it.


#46

Congrats on your 56 days!!!

115 days (0 relapses, not even one sip) for me, no AA, even people I live and socialise with drinked most of the time.

Like some good people her know it was not easy for me.

Help me: this app, research on recoveries, gym, main thing is honesty with myself on what triggered it and dealing with it.

I was drinking 6 to 10 pints every evening mixed with wisky and sometimes wine, do not remember most of it, only what counted in the mornings after blackouts, for 10+ years.


#47

I love reading everyone’s stories. Sharing is a great way of giving back. I went to one meeting, and it wasn’t for me. I did learn some things from the literature though, and applied it through my recovery. I also found a fellowship on this app. I could not have done it without the support of a sober community. Although I did not have a sponsor, I had someone in this community there for me when I really needed someone.
While I didn’t stay sober through AA, I do give it credit for giving me some of the tools that I needed. For me that was, being honest with myself, putting the work in, learning to accept life on life’s terms, taking sobriety one day at a time, and when in doubt, trusting the process. .I wish everyone success along their journey no matter what it might be.


#48

Congrats! I’m on day 1108 without any program. I just take it day by day. Some days are easier than others, but I keep on truckin’ with the support of the family and few friends I still have! You got this.


#49

Well, in the beginning many years ago I muddled along, quitting and relapsing and learning a little bit along the way…like moderating doesn’t work, switching up days that you drink or what you drink aka bargaining also doesn’t work. I think of those years as my gathering of knowledge and building my sober toolbox years. I learned that putting a few sober days or weeks together made me feel good about myself. That helping others took my mind off myself. That yoga helped soothe my mind. That I was responsible for my drinking, not my husband and his drinking, not friends or family drinking, not a wedding, funeral or anything else…just me and the choice to drink or not.

I learned that as long as I kept stringing days together and focused on today, right now, getting sober was more doable. Thinking about FOREVER was too draining and I know for sure all I have is right now today.

I found that putting down on paper and then my phone a list of why I wanted to be sober, what I would gain, how I wanted to live my life, really helped me when I was feeling weak…I could read it over and it always brought me back to reality. I took a lot of walks, ate a lot of sugar, relapsed for years, but always added the lessons to my toolbox and kept moving forward. I cried a lot. I despaired a lot. I tried naltrexone. I contemplated suicide. I drank, a lot, for a long time. I made a mess of a lot of things.

I realized after awhile the anxiety and off feeling I had always felt…that was mostly from alcohol or the lack thereof. Huh, that was eye opening. You mean I don’t really have to feel that way every day? Apparently not. Who knew?

I stumbled upon sober communities …Soberistas, Women for Sobriety, Talking Sober. I read and learned and soaked up guidance and support. I read a lot of books…novels and non fiction…adding to my toolbox. I worked out a lot, bicycling, running, fitness classes, yoga, walking, etc. I found a lot of stress relief in working my body. I took a lot of naps. I meditated. I ate a lot of chocolate. A LOT. A lot of time spent in nature or with my nose in a book or napping or running. I kept on keeping on.

But most importantly, I didn’t drink and I didn’t give up. Slowly the numbers added up, my confidence soared and my mental health improved. After about 400 days my anxiety was ratcheting up, a lot. I got on Lexapro and found peace. I feel and am healthy in body mind and spirit.

I am sure there are other things I did to help me thru…my sobriety was many years in the making …many painful years…but I kept at it and I continue to take life day by day.

There are many paths to be taken. Choose the ones that work for you and don’t be discouraged.

:heart:


#50

Excellent! Proud of your effort. :grin:


#51

I am coming up on 90 days and realized I needed more than just “not drinking” to help me fully recover. I am later to the AA game; I didn’t think I needed it but I really value the fellowship and the reflection/ work required for step work.


#52

Yessss :pray::pray: preach it


#53

Thank you. This is the first time since I was 18. I’m 39 now. It feels nice to have clarity. I’m so glad I’m in IOP because it’s a big help. I thoroughly enjoyed the morning meeting too. It’s nice being around folks that can dig what it’s like. Congrats too you too. Hope your night is awesome :slight_smile:


#54

Thank you for sharing your journey. It was very inspirational. It’s so important to keep going even if we stumble, and not give up the fight.


#55

I got sober with AA ,when internet came in i was 6 years sober and smart came to uk i was 10 years sober so AA was a life line, not all the other ways to get sober like they have today ,u tube blogs ects.