This is totally my story. I do well, but then small things slip in and I gradually get deeper into it, until I full on relapse without realizing what I’m giving up.
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I am agree with you. I believe that sobriety must be total in order to experience total healing
Same to me. Exactly the same
Thanks for your opinion. I get it. When I relapsed at first it was after doing some things I want used to doing and after some time I felt like my relapse was half a relapse cuz porn wasn’t involved. I told myself just be glad you didn’t fall off the wagon like in times past. And I got frustrated and just went looking for porn.
This situation to me is different cuz I was having phone sex. So I really had no need or desire to add porn to the mix. If during or after the phone sex I’d gone to porn or felt the need, maybe I’d be looking at this differently; but this is where I am.
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Yeah, you get to decide. I know for me, I’d consider any sexual activity aside from with my wife, I would consider a relapse. I’d be giving in to the lust. I’d consider it a relapse especially if I was getting the shakes.
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I guess I get that for you, you’re married and referring to activity,not just thoughts. Cuz with thoughts I think it’s a little different… Although the Bible does say that a man looking at a woman and imagining having sex with her is just like doing it.
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I try to watch my thoughts as well. I dont mark thoughts as a relapse though, cause I’m not acting out, but it’s a slippery slope.
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The real name of our common enemy is Lust. Which causes see others like mere objects of pleasure not like persons.
Today I am 16 days sober and all of you here had been a great boost in this time of sobriety.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart
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I totally get that. Thoughts are definitely slippery slopes at times. It sometimes seems like there’s no escape,but Jesus makes sure there’s a way to escape every temptation that comes out way…we just have to remember that and look for it
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Looking back on this @Victorious, I think that your decision to keep to separate clocks for porn and mb was a splendid one.
The saying goes, “Progress, not perfection.”
You know that you’re not perfect, but you still gave yourself credit for being porn free. Good job. Lots of addicts would be happy if they had your progress.
I’ve practiced all or nothing thinking during my years. I do better with a more positive gentler approach.
Some don’t share the same opinion having concern that one behavior, mb, will ultimately lead to other acting out behaviors. That may be true. That point has merit. And you may find that you have to make some adjustments with your dual clock system.
But that’s not always the case. Having a double clock had positive outcomes for me and others that I know.
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Shalom search for
Shalom
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Wow! It’s amazing how much I’ve changed five years later. I don’t think the same as I did back then.
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Life is about evolving, Kev. Glad you’re in a better spot. I remember one of your posts from years ago where you had a Paradigm shift in that you realized that you were just being white knuckle sober and not really changing your being. I thought that was pretty significant for you.
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I was so broken at that time. I had no clue how it’s going to get out of this. It was going to take a miraculous move of God. And He has been faithful. He’s bigger than all this. He’s been with me the whole way. I wish it didn’t take so long, but it’s definitely worth it.
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That’s gives me hope. .I need that
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Day 3 again. No excuses. No giving up.
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Never give up. Dust yourself off and do a quick recovery. Move on and keep improving.
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Yes. Lately I am finding a lot of inspiration in a podcast named Overcome Pornography of Sara Brewer. Do you know it?
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Never heard of it or her. What’s the idea behind the podcast? Is she an addict?
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